[yaleoxford2nd]

1.I have low self-esteem- I really shouldn't have been born, my mom told me that they were using a condom when she conceived me and I was unexpected and she wa going to abort me but my dad said no!
2. I'm worthless- I have friends but they are bad influences on me, I can't do anything right just a big mess up! Can't even get a boyfriend and if I do he just hits me/cheats on me/ or breaks up with me after I give him what he wants.
3. I hate myself- I'm ugly, in school I never really had very many friends and my friends were picked all the time like I WAS!
4. I have a anger problem- every little thing gets me mad!
5. not wanted- my parents neglected me till I was 16 then they loved me for 3 months then kicked me out.
6. my family is irregular- dad druggy, mom psycho! Brothers are alcoholics and or druggies
7. I'm not intellegent as others my age
8. I'm ugly- 18... no boobs, no butt, bad horrible looking teeth, short 5'2 fat- 115lbs

What can I do to improve myself? AND DON'T TELL ME TO SEE A SHRINK- THEY GET ME MAD!

[Ash123]

I'M ready to tackle this if you could make a deal to listen... I know you are sick of everything and I'm a stranger but let's just try and see if I can help at all:

THERE IS NOTHING WORSE THAN FEELING ABANDONED AND INADEQUATE.

First of all, I am really sorry for your pain. I wish I could make it go away with a snap.
But I truly believe it will if you try a few things:

THE TRICK TO LIFE IS HOW WE DEAL WITH ADVERSITY.

Life throws a lot of things at us. And you have been thrown A LOT!

1) Find a friend you trust.
Try to help them as much as they help you.

2) Find a support group. And when you do... DON'T ABUSE THEM. Don't take advantage of their help because you are angry or hurting. I would suggest a teen counselor, a women's health group. They have experience with situations just like yours.

A church might help you as well... but I am not advocating one over another.

3) You need to learn to like yourself. You do not seem to be as bad as you say.
But I know the physical things can be a part of it too.
I would see a dentist and talk about your concerns. A nice smile is still possible...

4) Every year of your life things will get better. As you find friends and learn to follow what you really love in life - and not worry about what others say - you will find your path. The key is to dream and follow those dreams. Your bad childhood makes you want to quit. But my guess is you may surprise yourself if you don't. The greatest moments come from beating the biggest adversities.

5) DON'T HATE. Forgive your parents for being weak. You are stronger.
And thank God that he was so intent on getting you to earth that he got you past the condom!

If you wake up tomorrow and say that you will love yourself and forgive everyone around you, I GUARANTEE you that your day will be better. People are drawn to happy peaceful people and boy would people be shocked if you did!!

6) I think a good therapist would be good for you. But don't go if you don't want. They HAVE worked with people just as angry and upset as you. Any doctor would have names or look in the yellow pages under psychiatrists.

7) I am sorry for your pain. As a special favor I am going to try to feel your pain and hope I can take some of it away.

You are loved. And the braver and more giving you are the more you will feel it.
Church is a good place. I don't go every Sunday, but sometimes it really does help.

Good luck to you!! Life is about how we handle the trouble that is given us. You have been given a lot.
But I think you could surprise yourself.
When you want to give up, think of how everything you see might never have happened at all if you hadn't beaten the odds!

[JoeCanada76]

You need to start to get some kind of counsel. If your not willing then you do not truly want to get the help you truly need. If your not willing to change the way you think and seek out help with a counsel then you do not want to change and you won't change. It is your decision.

[nauticalstar420]

If you don't want to seek professional help and see a therapist, then I don't really believe you want to get better.

Therapists make everybody mad, that's what they're there for. I can do my best to try and make you feel better, but let me tell you, I'm no professional.

1. You were a "mistake". Okay, so what? Do you know how many unplanned pregnancies there are every year? More than anyone can count. Either way, you are still here on this Earth, a living, breathing human being like everyone else. Who cares what your parents think? Most people don't.

2. No one in this world is worthless. If your friends are bad influences on you, ditch them and find new ones. I'm sure you could get a boyfriend if you tried, but maybe you really don't want one? Besides, boyfriends aren't all they're cracked up to be.

3. I was picked on also when I was in school. I didn't let it bother me, and eventually the bullies moved on to someone else weaker than I am. I am sure you are not ugly. EVERYONE is beautiful in their own way.

4. Most women have an anger problem. Its called PMS. If you don't let things bother you, then they can't make you mad, bottom line.

5. Okay, your parents kicked you out. If they were to do something like that to a helpless 16 year old, they aren't worth your time anyway. Just because THEY kicked you out, does not mean you are not wanted.

6. Don't be like your family. Be the first one to come out of your family to make something of yourself. That will show them that you are worth much more than they think you are.

7. You may think you are not intelligent, but from the posts I've read of yours you don't seem unintelligent to me at all. Getting an F in school does not mean you are stupid. I got a couple of F's, and its because I didn't try, not because I was stupid. To me, school grades prove nothing.

8. 115 lbs. is not fat, no matter what way you look at it. I have crooked teeth , but I don't care. If they start to bother me that much, I'll get braces. If you look at yourself in the mirror and set it in your brain that you love yourself, then all of the imperfections that you see will go away.

[nauticalstar420]

it doesn't matter what people think of you, its what you think of yourself. You need to sit down and ask yourself who you are (not just your name but really deeply who are you! )
You need to except who you are especially if its good! If not then find your good self and work on it.
Its you can rule and you know where you've been and its you that rules your life... follow your heart but sometimes you need to follow your brain too! Find your inner self and you'll be fine and think about what you want and how you react to things and how you need yourself and remember LOVE YOURSELF! I HOPE I HELPED YOU!!

You just said this to someone else in another thread. You give great advice, why don't you take your own advice? :)

[acetc]

If I might make a suggestion, if you could volunteer a little time at a children's hospital I think you would find that thing inside yourself that you are missing , beauty is not always just in a reflection.

[Wondergirl]

Shrinks are SUPPOSED to get you mad! That's what they do best! If you are mad, that means something positive is happening inside you.

AND if you hate yourself so much and think you are fat and ugly, why did you post your photo? (Or is that not you?)