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    coni303's Avatar
    coni303 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 26, 2007, 02:28 PM
    Returning to ex-wife?
    How much control do ex-wives have over ex-husbands? I met a really nice guy; spent most of the last 2 weeks at his house. He has been divorced 14 months. Now the ex-wife has showed up, pitched a big fit (crying, making him feel guilty and threatening to kill herself) and he is staying at her house until he gets things "under control" because she is "acting crazy". I'm a smart, mature woman and I would tell anyone else not to fall for that line. I'm wondering what are the odds that he is being truthful. He has his own house and their house (which he maintains) is on the market. I would like to hear from some men.
    Haplo's Avatar
    Haplo Posts: 128, Reputation: 17
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    #2

    Jul 26, 2007, 02:35 PM
    Hard to say without more information about what happened between them. Do you have details?
    coni303's Avatar
    coni303 Posts: 4, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jul 26, 2007, 02:43 PM
    He said that she had sex with a co-worker when she was drunk (she usually doesn't drink) in Florida. She told him about it and he left. I find that difficult to believe because I couldn't get that drunk. If I did had sex with a co-worker and realized what a mistake I had made, I sure wouldn't return home and tell my husband about it (if I wanted to keep him). He also said that they had gotten to the point where they took each other for granted. He said she liked drama and he didn't. When she came to the house she said that he had told her that he loved her, that he just wasn't in love with her. He has said the same thing to me; that he cares for her, but isn't in love with her. He says he lives in his house and she lives in hers. At this time, however, he is spending the majority of his time at her house and I'm not hearing from him.
    ss4gilpin's Avatar
    ss4gilpin Posts: 8, Reputation: -1
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    #4

    Jul 26, 2007, 02:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by coni303
    How much control do ex-wives have over ex-husbands? I met a really nice guy; spent most of the last 2 weeks at his house. He has been divorced 14 months. Now the ex-wife has showed up, pitched a big fit (crying, making him feel guilty and threatening to kill herself) and he is staying at her house until he gets things "under control" because she is "acting crazy". I'm a smart, mature woman and I would tell anyone else not to fall for that line. I'm wondering what are the odds that he is being truthful. He has his own house and their house (which he maintains) is on the market. I would like to hear from some men.
    Well its sounds to me like the ex-wife is just realizing she has made a mistake she made by divorcing the ex-husband but saying she is going to kill her self is a bit ex stream if you really loved someone then you would want them to be happy no matter what the outcome has to do with them... so in my opinion I think he should move out and live his life unless he loves her...

    Hope that helps
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    Jul 27, 2007, 10:17 AM
    They still are active in each others lives, and honestly neither of them has moved on emotionally from each other, and as you can see neither is ready for any relationship with others, and it will be a long time before they are. I hope you don't get caught up in their drama, and if you do, expect nothing from him. That way you might not get hurt to bad. The best thing is to leave him to his own misery, and find you a happier, and healthier partner, with less baggage.
    Haplo's Avatar
    Haplo Posts: 128, Reputation: 17
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    #6

    Jul 27, 2007, 10:43 AM
    I agree with Talaniman as well, aside from the misery and such.

    It certainly sounds like he and his ex have a lot of unfinished business and their feelings were strong enough to get married at one point, so they're pretty strong.

    As for what she did and how it all happened, it's not really for you to judge. He needs to figure out his life and it may be a good idea for you to get off the train before things get out of control.

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