Check out some similar questions!

Amber25 · Jul 23, 2007, 06:46 AM

Hi everyone. Hope someone can advise me!

In February this year my Dad was diagnosed with a terminal Cancer. Within a week, his girlfriend (who had previously refused to marry him on several occasions) agreed to marry him and they were married within a month. She gave up her job to care for him and he moved into her home, keeping on his own house too. After 2 months I gave up my job too, as she was providing very little care for him. She goes out for most of the day every day, so I am now his full time carer - although this isn't recognised by others as she is claiming Carer Support. The Doctors only give him about 6months so he has been trying to get his finances etc in order. He has decided to give my brother and I 85% of his will and his wife 15% (as she owns her own property and has her own savings). Recently his wife has constantly been saying things like 'I've gven up my job for you, and when you're gone I'm going to have no job and no money'. She has also said that people have told her that as his wife she should have more of his will than 15%. It is my Dad's desire for the majority his money to come to his children. We don't get on with his wife and I'm terrified that when he's gone she will try and contest the will. It's a dificult enough time anyway, without having to go through that whilst dealing with out Father's death. By the time he has gone they will probably have been married for less than a year. Will she have adequate grounds to contest the will and maybe win?

I'm not being mercenary, but I can't stand the thought of my Dad's memory being tainted by difficult and stressful court cases. And I can't stand the thought that my Dad's wishes could be ignored, and his hard earned money be taken by someone who did very little looking after him.

Please advise!

Thanks Amber xx

touji-za-nai · Jul 24, 2007, 08:17 PM

I really don't know what to say about the will issue, but you seem like your already OK with his death "By the time he has gone-"

Pray, I've seen cancer simply disappear from it. Twice actually, both where terminal.

RubyPitbull · Jul 27, 2007, 09:19 AM

Amber I am so very sorry to read about your father's situation. Facing one's imminent death is strain enough without having your family members fighting over who gets your money. As touji suggests, there have been cases of miraculous recoveries. I think it is more important for you to be helping your father through this difficult time than worrying about the dispensation of his money. Yes, it is terrible that his wife appears to be placing him under additional strain but if your father wants to leave you money, he will do so. If you feel that she is manipulating him and taking advantage of all of you, then you need to talk to him about your concerns. If your father is unsure or waivering at all, and considering rewriting his will in a way that is appears to be completely out of character for him, then it might be beneficial to discuss his making an appointment with his attorney who drafted his will and have ALL OF YOU that are mentioned in the will, meet with the attorney. He/she will do what is in the best interest of your father and act as a mediator with all of you. At that time, your father can advise him of what he wants, without the fear of anyone manipulating him and misinterpreting his intentions.

jstrike · Aug 2, 2007, 10:53 AM

Very sorry to hear about your father, this type of situtation is never easy on anyone.
It sounds like your father has his wits about him based on the fact that he's only leaving her 15%. I'm no attorney but I would think that, if challenged, the will would stand up in court as they have not been married that long. You should discuss power of attorney with your father while he still has his faculties and before his "wife" tries to get it.

Pray for the miracle.

LearningAsIGo · Aug 6, 2007, 06:14 AM

I can't advise you about the legal issues, but I want to say how sorry I am that you are in such a difficult situation with all of this. Cancer is a wicked thing and I hope you all have the strength to get through it. God Bless.

celestec02 · Sep 11, 2007, 10:00 AM

Amber,

I am sorry to hear about your father. I lost my father 2 months ago in a 18 wheeler accident. It happened so fast. My father did not have a will and of course his wife got everything. Even though he told me that he wanted me to have his truck. Everything will work out. She is just being greedy and will get what she deserves. She shouldn't get more because she is his wife. You and your brother deserve it.

HistorianChick · Jan 8, 2008, 09:45 AM

I have no words of wisdom about the legal issues of your case, but I can say one thing about losing your Dad because I lost mine.

Make sure your Dad writes down some of his memories. I bought a Father's Journal - it asked all kinds of questions like, "what's your favorite childhood memory?" and "tell me about your first kiss." I've had many hours of sweet remembrance for my Dad reading through his memories.

Take advantage of all the time you can. And who knows? Prayer may work miracles for you!