[sadmom101]

My son left home at 17-to go live with older sis about 300 miles away-i said yes-couldn't stop him-said he hated school here and would die here- so off he goes. I sell trailer =move to apt.-he does OK for awhile-then has fallout with sis, visits-still hates it here-goes back- does great with roomate---graduation comes closer and all of a sudden he doesn't have enough credits-it was the school and teachers fault just like when he lived here. All the while I have sent him money to help out-go up and visit-all great-going to summer school-love you lots mom-come back soon-move here-i miss you... Less than 24 hours later I call to tell him I found a place near him and he did a 180---oh, sorry mom I can't move from my situation cause I can't pay rent and go to school-besides you couldn't wait for me to leave-you spent all our money on yourself and I never had the medical care I should have... ect... ect-------I said I was single had two kids and no child's support-how was I supposed to provide everything all alone... he starts cussing -i hang up=Leaves message of- congratuf9ckinglations-you have no son-you are a stupid piece of sh8t and don't ever call me again!! Go F8ck yourself!! ---I am in shock-that was a month ago and after the anger-the hurt set-almost lost my job- now I am just numb and dumbfounded---
He is blaming me now for raising him in a trailer park and being poor... I honestly did the best I could with what I had-not a hell of a lot-his dad was a dud no child support for years-then he died-left many messages- from anger and hurt-no contact-how do I keep going??

[shygrneyzs]

I am sorry that you are going through this with your son. When your ex died, did your children receive his social security? That would have helped some with the finances.

But you cannot help what happened here. With limited resources, there is only so much one can do. Living in a trailer park? There are worse places to live. Like in a cardboard box or out of the car. You did the best you could with what you had. Don't ever feel bad for that. Times were tough and probably still are tough. Your son needs to grow up and he has lots of time to do that. Maybe he can take what he thought was so bad in his life and turn it into something good for him. But to lash out at you is not right. This is the time he needs to get his attitude adjusted and be thankful for everything you tried to do for him.

You can tell him that as long as he is going to be cussing at you and calling you names, he is not welcome. Yes, you can say that. You have the right not to be verbally abused. Don't take from him what you would not take from anyone else.

You go on by understanding you did the very best with what you had and the rest is up to your son. You can love a child but you cannot make that child act in a loving manner to you.

Hugs to you and hope this turns out better for you.

[Fr_Chuck]

Well of course it all starts last year when you allowed a 17 year old to move out and did not control the situation and make him do what he should be doing, by not being at the school checking his credits and so on.

With that said, that is all in the past, he is currently blaming everyone for everything and not taking responsibity, so you let him go, and hope in 10 years he will havve turned around,

And all the tings shygrneyza said