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MeltimMN · Mar 11, 2009, 02:11 PM

Do you think there is a difference between being in love and loving someone? Is the difference worth the distinction?

I recently posted about my fiance' and I separating for a while so we can work out some financial and other issues. She made the comment that she loves me but doesn't know if she is in-love with me. I told her I wasn't concerned with that. See I think that being in love is a temporary state based on hormones, attraction, excitement, discovery and playfulness at the beginning of a relationship. I think you can be madly "in Love" with someone but not love them. To me, Love endures all. She says she loves me. The "in Love" piece of a relationship comes and goes. But love is continuous, fulfilling and as I said enduring.

Am I onto something or on something?
T

talaniman · Mar 11, 2009, 02:31 PM

Unless your definition matches hers, your still single.

liz28 · Mar 11, 2009, 03:45 PM

When you are in love with someone, your love for them grows each day. You can't imagine a life without them. Every day you feel your heart has reached its largets point, it cannot hold anymore love in, and the next day it grows yet again for this person. They become as much a part of you as you are, you are IN LOVE with them.
Simply loving someone is different, this is the kind of love you can have for your cousin, or brother, or a good friend, while they are in your heart, and you will protect them, and they do meen a lot to you, you still feel that if they were not there your life would not fall apart, it would be worse, but not agonizingly paining and sad. This is when you LOVE them.

I think your trying to make your fiancé feelings match yours but you can't. Loves comes natural and cannot be force so you need to accept things for what they are and stop focusing on your energy by reading into things.

KristalaRista · Mar 11, 2009, 08:58 PM

I agree with you. I think "being in love" is a t the start of a really good relationship and then it kind of grows into something deeper and more meaningful, less puppy love and more adult feelings.

kctiger · Mar 12, 2009, 05:54 AM

In Love = Romantic love

Love = Very deep CARING for someone

Yes, there is a HUGE difference between the two. I don't think either of them have anything to do with age. Infatuation, puppy love, and sweet little crushes, those have more to do with age, or just lack of knowledge about definitions in general.

chel_z2010 · Mar 12, 2009, 05:57 AM

Ok so I'm in love with my long time boyfriend of two years... to me being IN LOVE means that you would go above and beyond for the one you love you have feelings for them even you can't describe and then for me LOVING someone is like a person that is a friend or an ex its hard to explain because people have their own personal beliefs about what the two mean...

Romefalls19 · Mar 12, 2009, 06:02 AM

Love: a strong positive emotion of regard and affection; "his love for his work"; "children need a lot of love"

In love: Waking up every morning next to you S/O and kissing them even though they have morning breathe

Personally, I don't think being in love fades in and out. If you find someone who you share a deep connection with then you fall in love with them everyday.