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NewLifeNewMe · Feb 13, 2009, 01:44 PM

Would you ever consider adopting a child? Why or why not? I’ve been considering this for a while now. It’s not that I’m not capable of having my own children, but I’ve always thought of adoption as a very admirable thing to do.

JudyKayTee · Feb 13, 2009, 01:46 PM

I think if you are seeking to do an admirable thing, you have the wrong mindset. If you want to love a child, adoption is the answer, whether you can or cannot have your own children.

I have a dear friend who has 5 children. Two are adopted. If you ask her which ones she says she can't remember.

That's someone who should adopt a child.

If you want to be admired, take in stray cats.

startover22 · Feb 13, 2009, 08:08 PM

Adoption is not meant to make one feel admirable.

stevetcg · Feb 14, 2009, 06:24 AM

It is a very admirable thing to do... but not a reason for doing it. If you want a child, adopt one. If you can love that child forever, adopt, if you have a hole in your life where a child belongs, adopt. Heck, if you are afraid or for whatever reason unwilling to birth one yourself, adopt.

If you are looking to adopt because it takes a "bigger person" than having one naturally... who cares. Adoption is about building a family, not one's esteem (self or otherwise).

As to would I - absolutely. I have also given a child to an adoptive family. I think adoption is a wonderful thing if done for the right reasons.

Synnen · Feb 14, 2009, 10:16 AM

I could PERSONALLY never adopt, for many reasons, not the least of which is that I'm a birthmother, and just could not deal with the whole thing from the other side.

I think that someone who wants to adopt because they'd like a CHILD (and notice that I did NOT say infant here) in their lives and would like to love and care for a child for the rest of their lives--that's a good reason to adopt.

Bad reasons to adopt: You want a BABY and can't have your own, you think it's admirable, you think you're "saving" a child, etc.

Personally, I think that adoption is a big business, and that there's not enough known about adoption by the general society for most people to even have a knowledgeable opinion about it.

startover22 · Feb 14, 2009, 10:37 AM

Most people do think it is admirable. I suppose if you were rescuing a child from abuse and neglect on an emergency "no time to think" basis, it may just be admirable. Kind of like a fire fighter going in and making a rescue.
With adoption, it is nothing like that. There are long lists of applicants that can do the job as you can... so what puts you at the top of the list? I guess would be the best question. There are older kids of course, like Synnen was pointing out that are in a bit of need of a permanent family, but most want to start with the babies. The list for adopting an older child has a lot less applicants. Good luck.

GoodLuckJen · Feb 24, 2009, 03:21 PM

Of course I would adopt a child.. There are too many children out there that aren’t lucky enough to have their parents raise them. They get stuck in foster homes.. which may turn out for the better and other times for the worse. Kids get abused all the time. If I had the financial security, I would definitely bring a child into my home.

GuruCindy · Feb 26, 2009, 02:54 PM

Yeah, I’ve heard terrible stories about kids in foster homes. They think they’re going to be in a better place and sometimes it just ends up worse than their original living conditions. There’s actually a movie I’ve seen commercials for recently that deals with the american foster care system.. called America actually. This is the trailer for it: YouTube - America - SATURDAY at 9pm|8c on Lifetime

JudyKayTee · Feb 26, 2009, 03:02 PM

Originally Posted by GoodLuckJen

Of course I would adopt a child..There are too many children out there that aren’t lucky enough to have their parents raise them. They get stuck in foster homes..which may turn out for the better and other times for the worse. Kids get abused all the time. If I had the financial security, I would definitely bring a child into my home.

If you can't adopt for financial reasons but otherwise qualify, have you considered being a foster parent?

GoodLuckJen · Feb 27, 2009, 03:09 PM

I have considered being a foster parent.. It's something that caught my interest.. Problem is I don't have the space right now. When my in laws move out, I may be able too. It is definetely something I want to do.. :(

And I've seen commercials for the movie. It’s on tomorrow night I believe. This is the link to some interviews of the cast members at the premiere I was just watching:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oPt1ZMr_308