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morganreece · Aug 2, 2012, 11:53 AM

I have been with my boyfriend for eight months, and I love him to pieces, I get very jealous over little things, some days if he says he doesn't want to see me I get upset. I always want to be with him. But a lot of the time I'm alone I start questioning whether I want to be in this relationship, I wonder about other guys also. Is this normal? I hate this feeling, and I'm scared of losing him. Can someone help me please

C0bra_M3nace · Aug 2, 2012, 12:05 PM

You're insecure, very insecure and unless you learn to deal with these insecurities you're going to throw your relationship under the bus. You have to either trust your boyfriend or leave. Without trust, there is no relationship.

morganreece · Aug 2, 2012, 12:07 PM

Originally Posted by C0bra_M3nace

You're insecure, very insecure and unless you learn to deal with these insecurities you're going to throw your relationship under the bus. You have to either trust your boyfriend or leave. Without trust, there is no relationship.

I trust him completely. What I'm trying to say is I question whether I want to be with him or not, but other times I get upset over him, is it my hormones?

C0bra_M3nace · Aug 2, 2012, 12:15 PM

Originally Posted by morganreece

i trust him completely. what im trying to say is i question whether i want to be with him or not, but other times i get upset over him, is it my hormones?

Horomones is a possibility, but I think at any point in a relatonship, if you have doubts about it, maybe it really isn't meant to be. Do you want to spend the rest of your life having doubts about your partner?

morganreece · Aug 2, 2012, 01:00 PM

No I don't. But I know that I want to be with him

I love him so much, and I can't imagine being without him, I know I want to be with him

C0bra_M3nace · Aug 3, 2012, 03:45 AM

Originally Posted by morganreece

i love him so much, and i can't imagine being without him, i know i want to be with him

Then you just answered your own question. Now to prove to yourself that you want to be with him as much as you say, then stop being so insecure. Actions speak louder than words.

morganreece · Aug 8, 2012, 10:49 AM

Originally Posted by C0bra_M3nace

Then you just answered your own question. Now to prove to yourself that you want to be with him as much as you say, then stop being so insecure. Actions speak louder than words.

Thank you :)

talaniman · Aug 8, 2012, 11:52 AM

Maybe you should have other things to do besides worry yourself over a relationship,like a very healthy happy social life. Life goals and activities and hobbies.

Sometimes our feeling do confuse us, especially the young and inexperienced, we are just unsure about ourselves, or the future, and that makes us insecure and confused.

How old are you, and do you stay in this relationship because you are afraid to be alone, or explore and experiment on your own?

8 months is not a long time at all, and maybe you are just learning what each other is about.

morganreece · Aug 22, 2012, 01:29 PM

Originally Posted by talaniman

Maybe you should have other things to do besides worry yourself over a relationship,like a very healthy happy social life. Life goals and activities and hobbies.

Sometimes our feeling do confuse us, especially the young and inexperienced, we are just unsure about ourselves, or the future, and that makes us insecure and confused.

How old are you, and do you stay in this relationship because you are afraid to be alone, or explore and experiment on your own?

8 months is not a long time at all, and maybe you are just learning what each other is about.

Thank you for that. I am eighteen years old, and I know that I want to be with him, I think it's just that I'm young, and I don't know what the future holds and I think that is what worries me, but for now I am happy:)

And what do you mean 'maybe you are just learning what each other is about.' ?

talaniman · Aug 22, 2012, 03:25 PM

Right now all you have are good feelings that are intense, but be real, there is much more to learn once the happiness of initial attractions have worn off and replaced by reality. You already have nagging doubts when he isn't around to fill you with butterflies.

Maybe it's a sign not get so carried away by that love thing and have a life that makes you happy when he ain't around. Keep this new love in healthy perspective, and enjoy it as you see where it leads and not be so dependent on it so fast.

To early for all that!

Too much, too fast, crash and burn!!

Give him space so you can have space.

crazycat111 · Aug 22, 2012, 04:53 PM

Being so insecure at the beginning of a relationship isn't a good sign. You've only been together 8 months which isn't long... so maybe his true personality/feelings are shining through

backpack2389 · Aug 22, 2012, 08:29 PM

At 18 it's perfectly normal for you to be looking around and not entirely sure if you're ready to commit/be monogamous. If your feelings are so distressing and if you are entirely confused, maybe you should consider an open relationship in which you guys see other people as well as each other. You do run the risk of him meeting someone else, but then again, you could meet someone too. 18 is awfully young for either of you to tie yourselves down (especially to people you're not entirely sure you want to be with).

You say you wonder about whether you should be in the relationship and think about other guys. When thoughts like this pop up, do they stem more from dissatisfaction or doubts about the current relationship or simply from being tempted by other guys? If the former, I think perhaps this relationship isn't for you. If the latter, I would say it's normal to wonder about other relationships, especially when you are so young and have not finished figuring out what you want in a partner.