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    AskMe11's Avatar
    AskMe11 Posts: 22, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jul 13, 2014, 11:40 AM
    Confused after a month and a half of dating
    Hi all


    I have been dating a guy for a month and a half. We would see each other once a week usually on weekends. He always initiated the dates. We saw each other last weekend and had a really fun night and ended up at his place, however we have only gone as far as kissing. When I got into the cab to leave his place he said you can at least message you had fun not just 'I'm home' when I got home I did messaged I had fun but... he replied me too, goodnight.

    After that we didn't speak for almost a week and didn't see each other this weekend as he didn't initiate and neither did I. I'm confused does he not like me anymore? Did I say or do something wrong. I want some closure on this but feel silly saying anything to him as I can look needy.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #2

    Jul 13, 2014, 12:33 PM
    Why don't you just text or call and ask how he is? What do you have to lose?
    AskMe11's Avatar
    AskMe11 Posts: 22, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jul 13, 2014, 01:42 PM
    I messaged asking how is he, but he didn't really say much and he asked how was I? I just replied Im good, and mentioned the weathers nice. He confirmed it's nice and said have a good day. I don't understand why it has become awkward suddenly. I don't know if I should mention it to him-and ask why is there a distance?
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #4

    Jul 13, 2014, 01:51 PM
    How old are you two? A month and a 1/2 and games already.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #5

    Jul 13, 2014, 02:20 PM
    Why not ask him if he wants to do something, go somewhere? Maybe he's just tired of always being the one to make the plans.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #6

    Jul 13, 2014, 02:51 PM
    Ask him out and talk to him. Maybe he gets an I'm not interested vibe from you. Or maybe after a month or so he is no longer interested. Ask him.
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #7

    Jul 13, 2014, 02:52 PM
    When I was dating, centuries ago. It was the guys job to initiate the dating scene. Oh, how things have changed. I will leave it at that. Smile.

    No smilie button?
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #8

    Jul 13, 2014, 03:09 PM
    I'm a believer in if you want to know something ask and you can ask a guy out for a coffee.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #9

    Jul 13, 2014, 03:12 PM
    I'm a firm believer in equal rights. Women no longer spend all day in panty hose, dresses, and high heals, cleaning, cooking, and raising children. They have careers, they can take care of themselves. So why shouldn't a woman ask a man out on a date? She can work in any field, but she has to wait for the man to make a move when it comes to dating? Nah!
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #10

    Jul 13, 2014, 03:16 PM
    Ugh, the electronic age. Texting and messaging are so impersonal. Call him!
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #11

    Jul 13, 2014, 03:22 PM
    Yep, needy, needy, chase him down until you get him. lol
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #12

    Jul 13, 2014, 03:35 PM
    How is calling a guy needy catonsville?

    It's 2014, not 1914.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #13

    Jul 13, 2014, 03:47 PM
    You need closure after a few weekend dates? He either wants to see if you are interested, or has no interest. Young guys nowadays get discouraged when they spend a month and there is no sex.

    No phone conversation is a good bet that he was looking for a hookup, or something casual, since that's ALL he initiated. That's why you may be looking at this closure thing from the wrong perspective. If a guy where really that interested in more than just casual (sex) he would be talking, NOT texting for a date. A week with no contact is more telling and why put yourself out there since chances are he will think you are ready for a good lay.

    But I'm old school, and think you youngsters have made a mockery of dating and relationships, and I suspect you are a bit old fashioned too. So crew closure via text, and talk face to face, or by phone, and ask directly what he thinks. Or accept he ain't interested enough to call and express himself for whatever reason, and just move on. Maybe he calls again, maybe he doesn't. OH WELL!
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #14

    Jul 13, 2014, 03:55 PM
    That is just a change in times from what I am used to. You are right, no need for a woman to marry, raise a child (your words) and that is why we have a 50% divorce rate and broken homes 2014. I respect your seniority but not necessarily your opinion.
    tickle's Avatar
    tickle Posts: 23,796, Reputation: 2674
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    #15

    Jul 13, 2014, 03:59 PM
    [MENTION=234242]CaTo[/MENTION]nville. That was a really a inopportune answer and served no purpose at all.

    Yes, this is 2014 and we do phone and we don't wait

    L
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #16

    Jul 13, 2014, 04:07 PM
    One man's opinion who was married for 54 years, sorry. Rare animals in 2014
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
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    #17

    Jul 13, 2014, 04:23 PM
    Divorce rates are not all the woman's fault. You don't have to chase a man but you don't have to be afraid to speak up and ask why when you want to know something.
    catonsville's Avatar
    catonsville Posts: 894, Reputation: 91
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    #18

    Jul 13, 2014, 04:40 PM
    Very true Homegirl.
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