[Wondergirl]

no idea...

When you succumbed, you played right into her hands. She isn't interested any longer but wants to find out if you are -- and if you are still panting after her and missing her.

no, no one has to be at fault, but the worst case is I am at fault. So I start with that, until , figuratively, I am proven to be not faulty.

Let's say no one was at fault. Could you live with that?

But are there things about you that need tweaking before another love adventure, so that you can give the relationship the honesty and validity it deserves?

[sean_s]

and if you are still panting after her and missing her.

Indeed...

She kept on commenting, I kept on casually responding like a normal person in the net whom I never met..

Then I posted the comment copying her own message , and she stopped...

Indeed... she was probably waiting for me to post that particular comment..
So I guess she feels good I guess to know someone loved her and misses her or?.

Speaking of it, my immediate response to the breakup was this:
http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Hate-Being-Lied-To/2179429
She did not bother to comment on this - does not this automatically show that I am hurt??

Let's say no one was at fault. Could you live with that?

Well, I will take that as an axiom

But are there things about you that need tweaking before another love adventure, so that you can give the relationship the honesty and validity it deserves?

If that relationship give me the integrity, then sure, of course...

[sean_s]

You know, I had interested my self in a stupid mexican...

You say you don't get angry. Contempt then. There are sides to you that aren't apparent at first, and they are just as ignoble and flawed as the rest of us.

Indeed there are, but anger is not one of them. I call her stupid, because she uses those arguments to cry on my shoulder, which she used to go away from me :)

[joypulv]

I feel like a lot of us here have adopted you. Are you still there?

[sean_s]

I feel like a lot of us here have adopted you. Are you still there?

I am and I am preparing for my ordeal today...

[mmresd]

If you are that decided, I hope you find what you were looking for.

[sean_s]

If you are that decided, I hope you find what you were looking for.

that decided in what?

you know I am confused. Some tell me I should keep on my Modus Operandi, so I keep on defining miilimetergenau what I want, and some tell me I have to relax, so I am relaxed, and people say I first have to find myself etcetc.

Yet one more reason to find someone with whom I can share my life.

People are picking me up of being 22, but trust me, I have a challenging life. On 19th I will meet some people from the Lunar Exploration and Analysis Group. Today, is my ordeal of showing internally what my concept to present to them is. 50%of that ordeal is done, 50% will be done soon. With that, I have quite well decided what I am going to tell them. The presentation handouts are individually made for each people, keeping in mind the color schemes, the font format etc they use in there websites.. or any information you could find. Yes in certain case, I am that precise. Yet, in certain case, I fall in an endless loop, and if I randomly come out, ît is a fehl decision.

I wish there was someone, with whom I could share my challenge (they don't need to participate actively), my passions, and my wins..

[Wondergirl]

Yet one more reason to find someone with whom i can share my life ... I wish there was someone, with whom i could share my challenge (they dont need to participate actively), my passions, and my wins..

We're here to share. :)

First, your duty is to yourself. How is that progressing?

[sean_s]

We're here to share. :)

First, your duty is to yourself. How is that progressing?

To myself: I am totally lost. Nothing makes any more sense. I completed the target assigned to me,in a somehwat dirty manner,but I did. So what??

[talaniman]

Take a break, relax, look around at all the things you have missed, neglected, or dismissed, and formulate a plan to put your head back together, and the life you will lead, without her, but this time, for yourself and your own happiness.

I don't know what to do is not an excuse, as it only takes a reasonable thought. Its supposed to be a hard process. Self motivation is a important, and high value skill to develop, as you have already been taught.

Wrapping the reason for your existence around the feelings and actions of another, was always a losing, self defeating proposition, but you did it any way. Now you have to correct the thinking behind YOUR actions. FACTS, and not just hard to cope with intense feelings are how you go about the next decisions that you make, so make sure you use only serious reasonable thought to come to that decision.

For me its so simple, get ready for the NEXT challenge, opportunity, or event to explore, and experience. But then, I have had a lot of practice, and know the rules, and routine of self motivation.

[sean_s]

Thank you, but the whole statement is like pushing the button on the remote harder and harder when it is not working. I know what self motivation is, and applied it in at least *some* cases in my life.

The reason I am here is because life is pointless for me know, and I can not motivate myself for anything. I am making the mistakes which I always hated and so on. Therefore saying "get a plan" won't work. Trust me, I have a million plans well written in my desk, and with a large redundancy support, so if one plan goes wrong I can use the other.

I can not relax, I am smoking 40 grams of virginia crossroads every day, and can not sleep, and if I try to sleep, I am crying.

Of things I missed or neglected for her, there is nothing I can pick up like that, as those lines are typed. In fact, I don't have a list of what I MISSED. I have a list of what I PAID.

Of my happiness, if I don't at all have a point of life , how can I have a happy life. I am working, but the success of that tastes like what I presume to be my own... It feels disgusting. Really. There is no point conquering a challenge. (heh she used to call me her conquistador).

I wanted to go to Austria to see Sabina, someone I know, and I could not. I was depressed work had to be done, and I was slow, unproductive. I wanted to take a break anyway, about a ticket, sat on the bus, and felt miserable , and came down from the bus.

I am deeply depressed, I just am rolling into a ball and crying. I can not work at all, in any direction. Really.

[Wondergirl]

Good grief! I'm a female (you know, one of those fragile, emotional creatures) and have been disappointed in love many times, but never fell into those depths of self pity where you seem to be wallowing! Now I want to take you by your shoulders and shake some sense into you. Plus, I'm the site Lead Editor and want to correct the spelling in your posts. Maybe I'll start getting rough with you... We Teutonic types don't usually suffer fools gladly. And yes, you're being foolish.

[sean_s]

Good grief! I'm a female (you know, one of those fragile, emotional creatures) and have been disappointed in love many times, but never fell into those depths of self pity where you seem to be wallowing!

Well, congratulations! ;) besides, I just note you say you were disappointed. I isn't disappointed. I'm broke.

Now I want to take you by your shoulders and shake some sense into you.

See above post maybe, please?

Plus, I'm the site Lead Editor and want to correct the spelling in your posts.

Please do.

Maybe I'll start getting rough with you.... We Teutonic types don't usually suffer fools gladly. And yes, you're being foolish.

I .K.N.O.W. that. If knowing that solved the problem, do you think I would keep on posting here, or would I accept the task of calculating the effects on solar wind in Mare Serenitatis?

[Wondergirl]

would I accept the task of calculating the effects on solar wind in Mare Serenitatis?

You would be more productive doing that. Let me know what you decide is the speed, so I can plan my wind-surfing expedition.

[sean_s]

You would be more productive doing that. Let me know what you decide is the speed, so I can plan my wind-surfing expedition.

I am afraid the wind in Mare Serenitatis would take about a year to bring your surfboard to the acceleration you are looking for.

[Wondergirl]

I'm easy. And patient. I can wait.

[sean_s]

I'm easy. And patient. I can wait.

Okay, will tell you when I can actually convince myself with a reason for doing it.

[Wondergirl]

A reason for calculating the wind speed on that mare -- or something else?

[sean_s]

A reason for calculating the wind speed on that mare -- or something else?

A reason for calculating the effects of solar wind on the electric charging of micrometeorite particles on Mare Serenitatis on the near side of Earth's moon

[Wondergirl]

"On the near side of Earth's moon" is redundant with Mare Serenitatis.