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    octoberlove's Avatar
    octoberlove Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Dec 5, 2006, 03:54 PM
    Friends with benefits
    How can a person maintain the friends with benefits connection when you really only became friends just before becoming friends with benefits?

    I had this experience and I think my anxiety chased him away. I really wanted to meet up again at least once but in calling I must have sounded like I had expectations when the last thing that I wanted was to impose expectations.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #2

    Dec 5, 2006, 04:03 PM
    I truly don't believe there is a friends with benefit situation, at least one that lasts long, since a sexual relationship, unless a person has only pleasure and no concern of relationship, can ever last.
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
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    #3

    Dec 5, 2006, 04:10 PM
    Oh, friends with benefits never work. Just read all the posts here. One person just wants the benefits, while the other usually becomes more emotionally involved.
    NeedKarma's Avatar
    NeedKarma Posts: 10,635, Reputation: 1706
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    #4

    Dec 5, 2006, 04:14 PM
    There's a whole previous thread here: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...+with+benefits
    SINGLE4's Avatar
    SINGLE4 Posts: 189, Reputation: 33
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    #5

    Dec 5, 2006, 04:16 PM
    Hi octoberlove!

    I am a prime example of what J_9 posted. I had a "friend with benefits" for 2 1/2 years. We kept the friendship when we were seeing other people just not the benefits. When neither one of us were seeing anybody then the benefits started back up again. This only ended a month ago. We are no longer friends. He still calls and wants the friendship but I think it is only because of the benefits. I one day decided that I wanted and deserved more then that. I developed feelings for him and I never told him but I think he knows.

    Bottom line... I lost a friend who (in the end) wasn't REALLY my friend!

    You deserve better!
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