[chaga]

I lost mybestfriend and love of my life 2 weeks ago and I don't understand my lifes purpose anymore, we had a connection so strong this doesn't make sense, everything I did in my over the past 22 years was for me however the constant knowing we would be together, we had 3 years to go before marriage and he was taken from Sept 11/08, the same day the only other man in my life that I ever trusted passed, my grandpa sept 11/01, what kind of sick joke is this, I feel like am a walking dead person, I see no future, I can't make sense of this,I want answers, he had a car accident in May, he was spared and yet 3 months later he is taken, WHY! 3 months that he was here he was warning me , trying to prepare me for something, we even talked if 1 of us where to pass what would happen, I asked that if that happens to please ensure he do everything he can to ensure I do not find out until after the visitation and surly noton the same day, my sweet angel did exactly that he passed away on Sept 6, I found outon the mornng of sept 11. Even the person that we spoke who would tell me,was the person that told me, I feel him, but I don't knowhow to go on or make sense of a love so strong and connection that carried and friendship and love for 22years could end like this, I don't get it. I can't stop crying and when I do I can't figure out why I'm not, the spiritual side of me see the messages he sends I want more, someone please bring him back. I just want to know why I am here and he is not.

[Revival]

Everyone has a time and a place. Unfortunately his has come, and you're left her to wonder why the hell the world can be so cruel. It leaves a bitter after taste in your mouth, it will burn in your heart, but you have to remember what he said when you talked about this. He must've told you what he would've wanted you to do should he go, you have to take the love you had for each other and mend your broken heart with it even though his piece will be missing in a physical sense spiritually he will always be there. My condolenses to you miss chaga, best of luck to you in finding your way again.

[Katho]

Chaga... start taking each day one step at a time... cry when you feel like crying... punch a pillow when you get angry... sometimes you're going to have to stop whatever you're doing and have a little "moment"... you'll work through the grief and the anger and the hurt... but you have to do it one step, or even a half of a step at a time. Sometimes you may have to take a few deep breaths and remind yourself that you are strong. None of us can give you the perfect answer to your question... even those of us who have been through losing someone we loved so much... but just remember that we're here for you. Have faith.

[el_bow_nee]

I'm sorry for your loss. I'm not sure of your religious beliefs but I'm a christian and I believe that GOD does everything for a reason. We may not understand why, but sometimes its not for us to understand. God may be trying to get your attention, this may be his way of pulling you closer to Him through this difficult time. God may want you to pour out your heart to him and allow him to fix it all. I would get in the presence of the Lord and pray until I couldn't pray anymore. He has great plans for all of us and while he understands your pain, He does not want you to be consumed in it. I will keep you in my prayers!

[sadgramma]

This is a very true statrment, pray