[tracy90]

Ok so I am 21 and my husband is 22. We have been married for almost 3 years (feb 14. 2012 will be our 3 year anni.) I actually have two questions I am hoping you all can help me with.

1. My husband really wants to have anal sex. He loves regular sex but anal is something new that he wants to try. We tried it once but before he even got the head of his penis in I was like "stop stop" it was a bit more painful that expected. So my question is... What could I do to make it less painful? I know there are anal desensitive creams available but I don't know if they work(help) and How could we work up to streatching me enough for him to enter. I mean obviously I am tight back there because I have never had anal sex so how could we get it to be a little easier and a little less painful?

2. How can I get my husband to take control? You know what I mean. Like sometimes I like it where we are just having sex together and its just normal but how can I get him to take control such as tell me what he wants me to do and such...

Any answers will be appreciated. Thanks.

[ScottGem]

1. The only thing I can recommend is very heavy lubrication. KY Jelly or similar. But there is the possibility that your anus is just too tight and you will never be able to do that pain free.

2. One of the most important sex organs is the brain. You need to explain that to him. Tell him you want to please him during sex, but you can't feel what he's feeling, so he has to let you know what feels good and what he wants you to do.

P.S. I edited the title of your post. Please don't tell us how to answer. If you feel an answer is inappropriate, then report it and the Moderators will take care of it. If you don't like an answer simply ignore it.

[Fr_Chuck]

Anal is of course not for everyone, and he should always use a condom. Lube, play with finger first and so on, all helps.
Make sure he is not rushing

Role play, ** bad school girl** fun cheer leader** police officer doing a traffic stop, anything you can dream up, you dream up one, he dreams up one

[frankplank]

I have anal sex and I at first had the exact pain, I never used anything just plenty of lube and its important that you penetrate the anus as this helps relax the anus. Never let him go in and out once the penis is inserted into the anus just let him thrust back and fore when starting performing anal. Also you can buy anal plugs which will stretch the anus. This takes time also when having sex try not to cause infection by vaginal and anus penetration.

and for the controlling just tell how you like it and maybe suggest some porn videos?

frank x