[ihatewestseneca]

I'll give you that. I know that if I didn't give it my all...then I wouldn't be able to look back on it and think, "Damn...I did a good job. it's her loss"

Agreed

[HurtingALot]

ISNEEZE... I was up right along with you at 4am this morning... DELTETING any and all contacts/reminders of my ex. (My story is in another post... ) I have heard nothing but that HE IS MISERABLE... (saw pics for myself) and multiple people confirm that he is not with anyone and not enjoying life very much.

Guess what? It doesn't matter. It is still painful to hear ANYTHING. I thought (and it did for a while) that hearing that he is unhappy would help me. Now I just don't want to know ANYTHING anymore. Time for me to worry about me and get on with it.

I hope you can do the same... it's difficult to let go... but it truly is Their LOSS. We did our best... and they didn't appreciate. WE DESERVE BETTER!

Stay away from the info. Nothing good can come of it... (trust me from experience... like I said, it's all "good news" for me... but it doesn't help at all.

We'll be just fine.

[ISneezeFunny]

y'know...

I just finished watching 2 movies this past week. Both of them gave the clear-cut message: If you love someone, go after them.

In one of the movies, a girl broke up with a guy because he got way too clingy. She said, "I want to be a part of someone's life, not all of it." Her friend, who wants her to be happy with the guy, replied, "Sometimes, if you love something, you want to be surrounded by it." And the guy kept trying... over... and over... and over... and they finally fell in love.

... what bull honkies.

Don't. Believe. The Hype.

[confused25]

HA! If only life worked as it did in the movies. In reality that guy would have been slapped with a restraining order.

[ISneezeFunny]

Update:

So... I'm getting better... but not 100%. Darn this flu.

I've been... not too busy. I try to stay busy, but being sick, all I want to do is stay in bed.

Went on a date yesterday... it was a bit weird. I was still a little sick so my game was a bit off... I was coughing a little. Conversation was good... we watched a movie afterwards at my place... but again, the sick thing may have thrown it a little off.

My ex's friends have been hitting on me. From what I understand, my ex and her friends don't really talk too much anymore after the breakup, as she has found a new group of friends with the new guy. So, it's been a little weird.

Also just remembered... that I had v-day planned extravagantly. I mean, I went all out. I got:

Spa treatment in the day
Dinner reservations at this place where I had to book it in MAY 2007. MAY!! This place is ridiculous.
Tickets to a show
Hotel reservations
Breakfast the next morning at another restaurant

... and I had to put deposits on the dinner, hotel, had to buy tickets in advance on this entire shenanigan. Oof.

[friend4u178]

It's only money sneeze , and remember how much you have saved on therapy.
Hope the plans for the big party are under way :-)

[ISneezeFunny]

God should smote those who made facebook/myspace/my school network.

I don't check fbook, myspace, or things of that nature.

However, I DO check my school/work network that we have... and everyone has a buddy list of everyone within the network. Every now and then my ex gets on, and almost immediately after is the "new guy." I try not to think of it much, but I get the feeling that the conversation goes something like this:

EX: HEY, HOW WAS YOUR DAY?
HIM: NOT BAD. YOU MISS ME?
EX: YEAH... COME OVER.

After 4 - 5 minutes, the new guy signs off... add 10 - 15 minutes of travel time... and my ex signs off. Like clockwork... almost every other day.

I wish I didn't see this, but I have no choice... it's the school/work network and it's not like I can just close the buddy list, and half the time, I need to be signed on as I'm doing something.

I don't think I'd be as weird about this if my ex just flat out admitted, YEAH, I'M SEEING THE NEW GUY 3 DAYS AFTER WE BROKE UP... but really, she's denied this to EVERYONE. It's absurd...

[wot2do]

Don't let yourself get paranoid mate - your making up conversations in your head! Next you know your thinking of other things.. dont go there!! I know how you feel my ex has starting going out loads... and I'm pretty dam sure with this bloke/blokes she is certainly going on days out with him. But we got to keep telling ourselves who gives a shi* at the end of the day - this person is not the person we thought they were and it hurts but we should be glad we find out sooner rather than later. It does not automatically mean they are doing anything with other blokes - just liking male attention. And you are getting plenty of female attention by the sounds of things. Be strong my man! ROAR!

[ISneezeFunny]

Update:

I saw my ex yesterday...

I was at the gym when it hit me... I had brought my backpack. I usually leave it in the car, but this time, I was on campus all day so I didn't have a chance to drop it off. So I needed a locker. Damn. I took a deep breath, and I went to the front desk, and I saw this girl with her back towards me, and I thought, "My ex doesn't have a sweater like that...maybe it's not her...hmm...she has a pretty cute body."

Then she turned around. It was my ex... with a new sweater. She was very friendly, said, "Hey! How are you?" I said, "hey, what's going on. I need a locker please." I got my locker, and I left.

That was it. Was it awkward? I'm sure it was... but... whatever. Not really a setback... just... happened.

Things are currently looking up for me. I just received a call about a business venture possibly happening in May, and this business venture will secure my financial stability for med school. I also just received a job offer that makes twice as much as I currently make. So it comes down to: business venture or job. I find out in March if the business venture goes through. ::fingers crossed::

Other than that, I'm doing fine in school, physically and emotionally stable, and just chugging along. Thanks to EVERYONE here at AMHD... I would list the people that helped me out here, but there're too many. Proof... NC works. This time, the ex didn't contact me back, HOWEVER, I am moving on with my life and zooming through it. Who knows, maybe the ex will contact me in a month or two... I don't count on it, but I guess we'll see.

[TrueFaith]

Man I think you did that really really well ;)

My X tried to get into contact with me. I didn't even say anything if I met her face to face I would have just said hey what's up and left. There is nothing more to say man.

This is how I see it man your moving on as you say so fast with your life. And she is getting left back. In the cold and rain ;)

I use to work with one of my xs after we broke up that was fun seeing her everyday but it just makes you stronger which I'm sure this has made you feel

good luck to you

respect

[ISneezeFunny]

Update:

I just got a call from one of my friends (ex's good friend... ) and she called up asking about what's going on with my ex... I obviously haven't spoken with my ex so I had no idea what was going on... and I asked her what was wrong and she claims:

... they don't talk anymore... my ex has completely stopped talking to any of her friends except her new guy, new guy's friend and girlfriend.

... she's been getting drunk every few days... and she actually never drank when she was with me. She was actually completely against the drinking idea.

Her reputation has gone down... quite a bit. People have been noticing her getting trashed and having to be carried out of places... and that's just not her. She had the rep of a saint.

... I know what I have to do... and that's to just stay put. She's a grown woman... she makes her own choices, she lives with them... just hurts to see someone so elegant go down this road...

[Romefalls19]

I know how you feel Sneeze... My ex is talking to a guy at work and completely changing herself. She used to have a lot of friends at work that she would talk to, but now everyone says she is fake and talking about her behind her back and stuff. They say she has changed so much since the break up and is looking for acceptance from people. I just said, "well this is what she wanted. I'm not getting involved" The only people she thinks are her friends are these loser guys who are overweight and think that a girl laughing with them means she is into them. Those are one of her old best friends words, not mine. I just find it funny that I have made more friends and she is losing them... So we shall see what's next, but rest assured it won't be any contact coming from my side of the gate

[ISneezeFunny]

Update:

So.. I had lunch with a friend yesterday who immediately asked, "How are you doing with the breakup?"

I thought, it's almost been 2 months... there's no reason for this... so I asked her why. Her reply was that people have been speculating the reason for the breakup. These are the following reasons that people are talking about:

1. I hit her.
2. I was TOO jealous of this one guy and she couldn't take it anymore.
3. I ignored her too often
4. I smothered her

... the only POSSIBLE true thing was #4... but that's because we spent a LOT of time together... so I mean, if I smothered her, she smothered me equally. We called as many times as each other, etc.

#1... is ridic. Anyone who knew me would laugh at this one. I treated this girl like she was the queen of my world. Gimme a break.

#2... hm. I was not "jealous" but simply asking why that guy was hanging around all the time... roughly a week before we broke up. I asked her about it twice... not in an accusing way, but simply, HEY... WHAT'S GOING ON? That's it.

#3 ignored her?? Gimme a break.

I suspect that it's her new guy's friends telling people half of this mess... which I really don't care much for. People know who I am and how I treated her, so it really doesn't matter what's being said. Just thought I'd share how ridiculous it all was.

Other things... I heard that my ex is "f-ing up her life" from her teammate. I didn't ask for details, but that's what I heard. No idea what's going on. On top of that, I heard that this new guy thing will go sour pretty soon as he's been seen with another girl quite frequently.

As far as my own life, it's going great. I'm really really enjoying my own time, keeping relatively busy due to school, work, and other activities. I'm even planning out a trip to europe in the summer.

Fantastic.

[ihatewestseneca]

I'm even planning out a trip to europe in the summer.

fantastic.

That's cool, I was thinking about doing that... but I'm not sure if I'd want to alone.

[ISneezeFunny]

ridiculous update:

so... I'm not sure why this week has been "let's talk about ISneezeFunny and his girl" week... but hey, why not?

Before I begin this long update, I must first thank my faithful readers. I know my life's relatively boring and mundane, but you guys keep reading it. Thanks.

Also, I must introduce some players in this update:

Can'tBeTrusted - my ex and my mutual friend. She is a bit of a gossip... so she can't be trusted. Nevertheless, she's a good friend.

UnBiasedFriend - she was in a really tight group with me, my best friend, and my ex. My ex and I broke up, UnBiasedFriend graduated early... so we all pretty much went our own ways. In my 4 years of knowing her, she has been extremely good at giving unbiased advice. If I mess up, she definitely says, "Sneezy, you effed up."

my best friend - my best friend

my ex - my ex

OK. So I'm running errands today and I get a call from UnBiasedFriend... I haven't spoken to her in a week or two, but her call is always welcomed. She calls me to tell me about this drama that just happened yesterday. Apparently, there was a huge party in which most of my school went to (I did not attend as I was at a friend's place).

Regardless, my ex, new guy, Can'tBeTrusted, and many others were there. Can'tBeTrusted was dumped by her boyfriend about a year ago, but he doesn't leave her alone. He has moved on, but will call her and say, "you know, today would be our 2-year anniversary" and just jackass-things. Can'tBeTrusted's ex boyfriend comes up to her, and says random things and makes her cry (she's a bit emotional). Can'tBeTrusted runs out of the club crying... and my ex follows to comfort her.

At this point, Can'tBeTrusted looks at my ex and says something... like... this:

Why are you out here? We haven't spoken in 2 months because you're always with your new guy. You don't even treat me like a friend anymore. You know what you did to Sneeze? That was f-ed up. You think you're high and mighty but you're actually pretty filthy for what you did. I can't believe you even have the balls to come outside in public after what you did. You think you're so secretive and still keeping up your innocence, but people ALL talk about you... and NO ONE likes you for what you did. Call up your friends and ask them if they're OK with what you did. Not only what you did was bad, you didn't even tell ANY of your close friends about the new guy. Sneeze treated you extremely well, and you PROBABLY won't find anyone to treat you as well as he will, but fine, you got tired of him, then at least tell your friends about it. Are you going to deny that you're with the new guy? Are you going to say you're with him? (at this point, my ex is speechless) Yeah, that's what I thought. NO ONE approves of you anymore. NO ONE approves of the new guy either. He's an idiot and he's going to hurt you and when he does, NO ONE will be there for you. NO ONE respects you anymore for what you did. Get back to the club. I really don't need friends like you.

... is that NOT ridiculous? I heard this entire bit... from UnBiasedFriend, who got a call from one of the witnesses of this debacle. Was it necessary? Not at all...

After hearing this, I really don't know what to say or do. Short answer is... nothing. I shouldn't do jack. But I can see this coming back to me REALLY soon. Duck and hide boys and girls... duck and hide.

[ISneezeFunny]

Update:

So last night, I had a few people over as we were studying for our practical in one of our classes. In the group were some of my ex's friends (our mutual friends). Anyway, we're studying... it gets to be around 3am... and suddenly, one of my friend goes missing. I check my room to see her clutching her stomach and writhing in pain in my bed.

I checked for the usual suspects... appendix, spleen, liver, heart, etc. Nothing seems to be REALLY wrong except for her pain. I suggested the hospital, but she declined... said that it'll get better soon. The pain subsided a few minutes later, but she still remained relatively immobile.

She asked to spend the night so I said that it was fine... we've slept together in the same bed before when we went on trips and such with our group of friends... and nothing's ever happened, so I didn't see anything wrong with it. She and I have been close for almost 4 years now, so... yeah.

Anyway, she kept me up most of the night due to her pain, but around 7 am, she went to sleep. I woke up at 8 am due to class, and found my arm around her, cuddling. I was also holding hands with her (interlocking). So I thought, that's weird. I let go, showered, told my roommate that she was there, and left.

I call her later that day to see if she's doing better (she was) and then as I was about to say, "ok, hope you get better, bye," she said... "I have a confession. I don't know if you noticed you were holding me last night...well...I did that"

Hm. Now, don't get me wrong. She's an attractive and fun girl... but she's been extremely close to my ex and me... so I always saw her as my little sister... type... deal. All in all, I just told her that I felt uncomfortable doing anything with her due to her friendship with my ex... and that I just really like hanging out with her. She said that was fine, and she apologized if she made me feel uncomfortable... and I said that I was fine, and that I'm glad she told me how she felt.

Side note: she currently hates my ex due to how she handled the entire breakup... and hasn't talked to my ex since the breakup. But still... I just feel kind of dirty if anything ever happened between me and her.

This will lead me to a new topic on this forum: What's the "dirtiest" thing you've done out of revenge..

[ISneezeFunny]

Oops update:

So... I had one of my friends over last night. We were studying... and she had some sort of a project she was doing so she was burning the midnight oil. Anyway, I went to bed earlier and she ended up spending the night. Again, another girl... but I've also slept in the same bed with this girl with nothing happening... so nothing seemed awkward.

... fast forward to 5am... we end up kissing a little... halfway into it, she looks at me and asks, "are you still hung up on your ex?".. btw, she's a mutual friend of my ex and me. I said, "hung up? not quite...am I ready to start another relationship? absolutely not." at this, she got EXTREMELY upset... and started yelling at me saying that I used her... and yelling:

Her: What makes you think I'm that kind of girl?
Me: uh... I don't..
Her: so you thought you could just use me and nothing would come about?
Me: uh... no. but... you really thought that us making out would make us be in a relationship?
Her: ugh, idiot
Me: me?
Her: no, me.

... so this is at 5am. I am tired. I am cranky. I am not used to dealing with "the talk" at 5am. Not only that, we just kissed... for about 10 minutes. So I just go to sleep, just dismissing her crazy antics as just that... crazy.

Around 7, she asks me to drop her off back home, which I did... and it was a silent ride.

1. I know I'm in the wrong. I shouldn't have made out with her... but I did. That was my bad.
2. I sort of should have let her know my intentions beforehand... but really, I didn't get much of a chance.
3. Am I way out of line thinking this girl's really out of it? She flipped a nugget when I said, I'm not really ready for a relationship right now... which didn't imply that I wouldn't be later on... I could. Give me some female insight on this... because I don't think she's talking to me anymore.

[mafiaangel180]

Lol... tell these girls to go home and sleep in their own bed!! Lol. That way you don't have to deal with their drama.

[talaniman]

1. I know I'm in the wrong. I shouldn't have made out with her... but I did. That was my bad.

This started by being in the same bed, you need a couch for guests who sleep over, LOL!

2. I sort of should have let her know my intentions beforehand... but really, I didn't get much of a chance.

I think she set you up, to deflect the blame of being your overnight guest, and give her something juicy to tell her g/f.

3. Am I way out of line thinking this girl's really out of it? She flipped a nugget when I said, I'm not really ready for a relationship right now... which didn't imply that I wouldn't be later on... I could. Give me some female insight on this... because I don't think she's talking to me anymore.

That has little to do with it as maybe she felt rejected, and lashed out at you, can't wait for the update, as she is a nut, but you have learned a lesson in thinking ahead, and avoiding this situation in the future.

[ISneezeFunny]

OK. I THOUGHT she was a nut... but I wasn't sure... I sat there questioning myself at 7am thinking,. have I really lost my touch with women that it's gotten this bad?

I have a feeling she feels used because we kissed and nothing stemmed from that. She really believes that once two people kiss, it's relationship time. Anyway, hopefully she'll talk to me again soon... because she's a pretty good friend.