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pol5019 · Jul 10, 2008, 08:45 AM

yeah me and this new girl will prob become nothing, we are just really close friends.

chery that response was amazing=], thanks so much for that, I honestly don't know how to respond but to just say thanks.

I'm sure my ex was the one to tell her brother to text me. I mean I had a very close relationship with her brother. Somedays I would go over their plave to chill with him, even when my ex wasn't home. It was like having a second family.

and I understand that I'm not the only one to ever go through with a breakup=]. Its just extra hard for me cause it's the first ttime for me being dumped, and she was my first love.

OK my new problem is this. Her grad party is on Friday, 2m. Her mom texted me a week ago saying she would love to see me there. Its going to be her friends and some family. I prretty much knew her entire family by name. So I'm not sure if I should go or not. I don't want to disrespect her mom cause she did nothing wrong, but on the other hand I'm not too sure how me and my ex will react to each other.

my ex said she wants me to come a few days ago so now I really don't know.

thanks again everyone=]

bigbird213 · Jul 10, 2008, 12:11 PM

Don't go.

You might feel bad at first, but its not worth what it will put your mind through. How can you expect yourself to be okay sitting at her house, with her entire family, but not be dating her. It will be awkward to say the least.

Your not disrespecting her mom, your respecting yourself. Its not worth the pain, trust me. Her mom will understand.

Chery · Jul 10, 2008, 01:36 PM

Bigbird is right.. call her mom and explain that the pain of the break-up is still too fresh and that you hope she understands if you decline. Believe us, she will understand and not hold it against you.

When the times get rough, just log on here and talk to us. We will be here for you too.

pol5019 · Jul 10, 2008, 08:30 PM

I'm still up in the air about the party. I totally get what your saying and my mind agrees with u, but my heart is telling me something different so I don't know what to do

And p.s I had a dream last night with my ex in it, so that makes it 5 nights in a row

hjpan · Jul 11, 2008, 06:25 PM

Originally Posted by pol5019

im still up in the air about the party. i totally get what ur saying and my mind agrees with u, but my heart is telling me something diffrent so idk what to do

and p.s i had a dream last night with my ex in it, so that makes it 5 nights in a row

You should NOT go to the party. Seriously, when you go... you're going to feel like sh8. Why? Because the love attachment is still there.

Chery · Jul 11, 2008, 06:44 PM

Originally Posted by pol5019

im still up in the air about the party. i totally get what ur saying and my mind agrees with u, but my heart is telling me something diffrent so idk what to do

and p.s i had a dream last night with my ex in it, so that makes it 5 nights in a row

That probably means that you have staid at home the last five nights too.
Go out and try your luck and 'create' a new dream. Stop hurting yourself.

Chery · Jul 11, 2008, 06:45 PM

Originally Posted by pol5019

im still up in the air about the party. i totally get what ur saying and my mind agrees with u, but my heart is telling me something diffrent so idk what to do

and p.s i had a dream last night with my ex in it, so that makes it 5 nights in a row

That probably means that you have stayed at home the last five nights too.
Go out and try your luck and 'create' a new dream. Stop hurting yourself.

pol5019 · Jul 12, 2008, 07:16 AM

So I'm sorry to dissapoint you guys but I went to the party. I went an hour and a half late, and left after staying for only an hour. When I walked in, she came running and gave ma a big hug(which I know means nothing), then ran off with her girlfriends. I then went and said hello to her parents, and her mother was so happy to see, and so glad I came. Then I saw her father, who I talked to for 10 min. I moved ffrom relative to relative, grandparents, aunts, uncles, second cousins, the whole clan. I spent more time with adults then I did with my friends who were at the party. But anyway, her mom pulls me aside and says"before you leave i want to see you" so I started to leave, and she pulled me inside the house. The house I haven't stepped foot in in three weeks, and says how much she misses me, and begins to tear. She tells me good luck next year in college, says how great of a kid I am, and how happy she is she met me. Well that brought both of us to tears. She was like a second mom to me I guess. But then I left, and my night was eh, OK. I think going to the party was not a bad idea, I'm glad I went, and I'm glad I saw her family, since I was so close to so many people. So sorry I let you guys down for going to the party. Does this count for my NC calender? so do I have to start over!

pol5019 · Jul 12, 2008, 07:18 AM

And I didn't feel like sh** at the party, I was actually happy, cause everyone was being very nice to me and not alienating me in anyway

hjpan · Jul 12, 2008, 09:15 AM

Originally Posted by pol5019

and i didnt feel like sh** at the party, i was actually happy, cause everyone was being very nice to me and not alienating me in anyway

That's because you WERE with the family, not her.

pol5019 · Jul 12, 2008, 09:22 AM

Very true, her family actually talked to me, and tried to move on. She made no effort at all

hjpan · Jul 12, 2008, 09:26 AM

Originally Posted by pol5019

very true, her family actually talked to me, and tried to move on. she made no effort at all

What if you spent time with your ex more than the parents?

You'd feel miserable

pol5019 · Jul 12, 2008, 09:38 AM

I know I would have been miserable, so I'm glad I didn't. This whole thing sucks, cause for the past year, they have become my second family, my home away from home. And I love her family so much. They have done a lot for me, and I will never forget that. I wish their daughter could be a little nicer but hey what are you going to do=]

hjpan · Jul 12, 2008, 09:56 AM

Originally Posted by pol5019

i know i would have been miserable, so im glad i didnt. this whole thing sucks, cause for the past year, they have become my second family, my home away from home. and i love her family so much. they have done alot for me, and i will never forget that. i wish their daughter could be a little nicer but hey what r u gonna do=]

Well, everyone assumed that you were going to see the ex more so we responded with "don't go"... lol

Just be friends with the family!

pol5019 · Jul 12, 2008, 10:11 PM

I wish I can do that

Just go over their house to hang with them, and neverrr see her lol

hjpan · Jul 12, 2008, 10:21 PM

Originally Posted by pol5019

i wish i can do that

just go over their house to hang with them, and neverrr see her lol

Yeh... I'll laugh at my ex when she comes to me and asks me to help her.

Fuq no.. I would not help her~

thisnthatshoppe · Jul 12, 2008, 10:30 PM

I'd wait a few weeks to call. Then, just call as a friend to see how she is. If she makes it clear that she does not want to talk to you, do not call again. As far as winning her back, there is no real answer to that. Your best bet is to remain her friend and let her decide what she feels. You can not change anything about the way she is feeling right now yourself. Time is all you can count on right now. Either you'll get back together or you'll heal and move on. But don't wallow in sorrow or dwell on this. It may hurt, but get out there and enjoy life. Whatever is meant to be in your life will be. Don't try to control circumstances. Let them come to you and work with what you're given. Make the best of things.

Blessed Be!

hjpan · Jul 12, 2008, 10:42 PM

Originally Posted by thisnthatshoppe

I'd wait a few weeks to call. Then, just call as a friend to see how she is. If she makes it clear that she does not want to talk to you, do not call again. As far as winning her back, there is no real answer to that. Your best bet is to remain her friend and let her decide what she feels. You can not change anything about the way she is feeling right now yourself. Time is all you can count on right now. Either you'll get back together or you'll heal and move on. But don't wallow in sorrow or dwell on this. It may hurt, but get out there and enjoy life. whatever is meant to be in your life will be. Don't try to control circumstances. Let them come to you and work with what you're given. Make the best of things.

Blessed Be!

Chances are... it's moving on

pol5019 · Jul 12, 2008, 11:18 PM

Yeah I have no intention of getting bak together with her anytime soon. I realizd what she has done to me and how badly she has hurt me these past few weeks. I have been chillen with my friends and have been hanging out with other girls. Which by the way didn't go well. The girl I brought to the conert hates me now cause I said something about her that was kind of mean, but 100percent true. So w.e, I reli don't care how she feels about me

pol5019 · Jul 22, 2008, 07:07 AM

hey everyone I just got back from mexico, it was amazing. Uh I kind of hooked up with a random girl from North Carolina. Woops=]. But also the trip was good cause it kind of cleared my mind and gave me a clean slate. I found out my e has a crush on some kid. But he's like a drug dealer, and a real bad kid, so I reli don't want her getting hurt. Any advice on this?