[bandgeek121]

Ooops, wrong person. Sorry for posting that.

That's OK


p.s sorry everyone for being an a$$ yesterday:o

[Justwantfair]

illinois wisconsin border

I live in Rockford, IL.

I understand that you want some freedoms, but parents are overly protective for a reason.

Maybe you can request a family meeting for new previledges.

[Wondergirl]

illinois wisconsin border

Have you heard of Richmond? Genoa City?

[bandgeek121]

Have you heard of Richmond? Genoa City?

Yes I have but I don't think I live really close, have you guys heard of antioch?

[JoeCanada76]

he has more freedom because he 1 1/2 years older and is taking drivers ed

Why not wait another year in a half and you would be given the same freedom.

[ANB428]

Why not wait another year in a half and you would be given the same freedom.

Not necessarily. My brother is 20 months older than me and I was never allowed to do a lot of the things that he did. Not because he was older than me, but because I was a girl and he was a boy. My mom treated me like this girl's mother is treating her, but she did it for my own good and I realize that now. At the time I did not, but now that I have a daughter, I totally understand! I never thought that excuse was fair, but it was.

[Justwantfair]

yes i have but i don't think i live really close, have you guys heard of antioch?

That is north of Chicago.

It's about an hour and a half from Rockford, IL.

Work on showing your mother some maturity. Your growing up, is just as hard on you, as it is on her.

[ANB428]

Bandgeek, I have been reading this thread and I just wanted to let you know that I have been where you are at about 10 years ago. My mother wouldn't let me go anywhere. I couldn't go spend the night at friend's houses, I couldn't go run around the neighborhood close to dark or after dark (when it was cooler). I couldn't really go out and do anything. Every once in a while I was allowed to, but not all the time. My older brother (by 20 months) got to practically do whatever he wanted to do. Go ride bikes with his friends, stay out after dark, and so many other things that I couldn't do. She always gave me the excuse that he was a boy and I was a girl, so he could do things that I couldn't do. I would get so mad at her for telling me that, because that is what I always heard growing up. At the time I didn't understand, but now I do. I wouldn't want my daughter to be out running while it is dark outside and going out whenever she wanted because there are so many PSYCHOS in this world. There are people kidnapped daily in good neighborhoods and bad ones. It is really scary.

You mom is being protective of you because that is her job. She doesn't want someone to pick you up and rape and kill you and leave you in a ditch, or for you to get hurt. It would crush her world if anything happened to you. I am so paranoid with my daughter and she is only 4 years old.

I also understand where your mother is coming from on trying to protect you from getting pregnant and everything. I am not saying that you are going out and having sex or anything. She is just concerned and doesn't want you to make the same mistakes your aunt has made, and I know that you realize that. Which is awesome so you don't have to make that mistake. I had my daughter when I was 19 and I wish that I would have waited because it is very hard for me to support her, I don't regret having her though. And I am sure that you already know that raising a child isn't easy, so I am not going to preach to you about it.

I just wanted to let you know that I was in the same boat that you are in and you are not the only one who has gone through this. So, just hang in there.

I would suggest that you take Gemini54's advice. Sit down and talk to your mother and try to talk to her about some things that you can do that the two of you can agree on. That would be a good start to your situation.

Oh and earlier I read a comment that you left on a post and you said “Why should I learn proper grammar.” It is very important to learn proper grammar. You use grammar in everyday life and if you don't use correct grammar, people will perceive you as being young or not educated very well. Do you want people having that thought about you?

Anyway, Good luck with everything and please let us know if you talk to your mom and you get any of your goals accomplished.

[N0help4u]

I always feared my kids getting a drivers license.
Why? Not because I didn't trust them but I do know how easy bad things happen to good people.
You need to work compromises that your mother would agree to.
Like get a jogging club together and maybe make it 5:30 or 6:00 instead of 4.
See if she would go for stuff like that.

[Athos]

So you haven't read it yet. The political stuff and foreign intrigue are mindbogglingly stultifying.

"Mindbogglingly stultifying"?? Quite a phrase.

Ludlum has 290 million books in print, translated into 32 languages, and made into several movies. Not bad for such a terrible writer who, I daresay, never used such an overwrought phrase.

[Wondergirl]

"Mindbogglingly stultifying"???? Quite a phrase.

Ludlum has 290 million books in print, translated into 32 languages, and made into several movies. Not bad for such a terrible writer who, I daresay, never used such an overwrought phrase.

He didn't write this one. He was dead already.

[Athos]

He didn't write this one. He was dead already.

Ah. I thought you meant all his work. My mistake.

I agree the posthumous one stultified me, and made my mind boggle and tremble (or it would have, had I read it).

[Hayymayy89]

Okay well your mom is going to be a mom, all moms are like that all the time. I don't understand either. She is just trying to do what is best for you. Just talk to her and tell her how you feel after all what have you got to loose. Just tell her that you are not your aunt and that she needs to learn to trust and let go sometime. Because your not going to be a little girl forever. If that doesn't work just tell her that you need some freedom and that you want to go do something with your friends. Sounds like a typical mom. But I think the whole running to loose a couple pounds, that's ridiculous for her to say no, if your not comfortable with your body you should be able to change that. Maybe 4 in the morning is the problem try asking her if you can go about 6 ish...

Let Me know if it doesn't work.

[barbiechick123]

I agree with most of the above, I'm 14 as well and I think you're mom is being a normal parent. First of all, running at four in the morning is RIDICULOUS, why? Because it's still dark, she wants you to be home when she's sleeping and also because you need sleep... no teen should be up at 4:00 AM trying to lose pounds, if you want to lose weight just start exercising at home. Secondly, if her little sis got pregnant at 16 that's a really good reason to not want you to be out and about, like you want to be. Boys can be pretty manipulative at our age, and can sucker you in to doing things you think are okay. Oh and about the "weirdos", she's absolutely right, someone can get abducted ANYWHERE, and it's mortifying. Just do what you're told happily and you will earn a lot more respect and privileges from your mum.

[Justwantfair]

Where does your older brother stand on the issue?
Can he assist by supervising you outside during the day?

natalie1xxx disagrees: she shouldn't have to go out with her older brother at 14!

These were questions to the OP.
They were not up for your disagreement or argument.
Besides that if her parents aren't allowing freedoms, one of the best tools will be her older brother to earn her own freedoms.
Please review the rules of the site before passing out disagrees, as there wasn't any factual information for you do disagree with in my questions.

[natalie1xxx]

Well I disagreed with most people on this. I see where you are coming from , I couldn't stand being in the house all day . You should be aloud to go out with your friends without being supervised. I think that a lot of people on this were missing the point , the people who said there is things to do in the house etc.. That is a bunch of rubbish as you should have the right to go out. And about the 'weirdo's' you are going to get them all the time even if you are 14 or 40 you can still get 'abducted' or 'raped' and that is just a danger that everyone is faced with so therefore I think you should tell your mum exactly the way you feel. :) let us know how it goes .

[nikosmom]

well i disagreed with most people on this. i see where you are coming from , i couldn't stand being in the house all day . you should be aloud to go out with your friends without being supervised. i think that alot of people on this were missing the point , the people who said there is things to do in the house etc.. that is a bunch of rubbish as you should have the right to go out. and about the 'weirdo's' you are going to get them all the time even if you are 14 or 40 you can still get 'abducted' or 'raped' and that is just a danger that everyone is faced with so therefore i think you should tell your mum exactly the way you feel. :) let us know how it goes .

You are allowed to disagree with people; we are all entitled to our own points of view. However, the rating feature is used to point out that advice given was factually incorrect. That was not the case here. There was a lot of valid responses and suggestions given to the OP.

Bad things can happen to people of all ages, but at this age, her mom is responsible for keeping her safe. Everyone here offered suggestions to help her earn more freedom. Although you may feel that she should be able to go and come as she pleases, her mother has a very different opinion on the subject which at this point in time- is the only one that matters. She was offered suggestions to do things in the house because let's face it, if her mother doesn't want her out at certain hours, then her best best is to find some sort of entertainment inside until she earns more privileges. She was also given suggestions for how to go about earning those privileges.

[natalie1xxx]

Yeah but what she was saying is that it wasn't just at certain hours she feels as if she is locked in a cage . She isn't even aloud to go out during the day when it is 70 degrees !

[Justwantfair]

yeah but what she was saying is that it wasnt just at certain hours she feels as if she is locked in a cage . she isnt even aloud to go out during the day when it is 70 degrees !

This coming from all of your 14 yo wisdom?
::sigh::
If you can't use the site properly, you will be reported.
Please follow the rules for posting and partcipation.

[nikosmom]

And that's her mother's choice. None of us here can force her mother to do otherwise. Yes, I'd be pretty upset if I felt like I was being locked up. But that still doesn't make any advice offered here incorrect, which is what the rating feature is for. We all offered ways to help her gain more freedom. Justwantfair suggested going out with her older brother because the parents trust him. Once she also gains her parents' trust, then hopefully she will be afforded more freedom in the long run.