[Ash123]

OK, I am going to assume she wanted more affection. I got to pick... one!

So, if she extended an olive branch, set up a time and place and put yourself out there.

Talk and listen and ask what is bothering her and tell her what you can do to make it better.

Do you really want to? Are you ready to be as affectionate as she wants?
Or do you just want to be casual? If so, be honest and let her go.
Or try again.. but see how you both feel after the talk.
Most relationships repeat patterns. I doubt too much has changed in 3 weeks.

And as for her girlfriends, she is young, that is to be expected... can't say too much there unless a planned event was missed. Or you all never do things together.

[talaniman]

Forget NC, what you mean is should you back off a bit and see if she responds.

So should I txt her back or should I just wait for her to contact me about Sunday?

If you have asked about this already, don't pester her again. Just a gentle reminder is all you need.

[talaniman]

"Let me show you how I'll be different"
And she would say... "When I'm ready" I guess she's ready now.

She better be worth all this is all I say.

[angel0772001]

Apparently she is worth it otherwise I don't think he would have came to us to try and save his relationship

[EasyDoesIt]

Well we've been texting back and forth for about 20 times today. She seems to be her old self... We were joking around. It seems like Sunday is a go... She said "I'm still thinkin things threw" but she said she wants to go to the shore with me and all. So I guess I just have to prove that I will keep my word and show her a good time. Do you think she's realizing now she misses me and wants to be with me?

[Ash123]

Well we've been texting back and forth for about 20 times today. She seems to be her old self...We were joking around. It seems like Sunday is a go...She said "I'm still thinkin things threw" but she said she wants to go to the shore with me and all. So I guess I just have to proove that I will keep my word and show her a good time. Do you think she's realizing now she misses me and wants to be with me?

Well, this is not about what she's feeling about you.

This is about what you feel about her.

Are you ready to take this to a more serious level? Really? Seriously?
If you are ready for that then focus on how you feel about her.

That is the more mature move. And she wants a more mature you...

*though that may mean she has to be more mature too (plans with you over plans with the girls) is she ready for that? :-)

Go slow and talk NOW about what was tough for both of you in the past - on Sunday.

Good luck.

[xxsassyxx]

Hello people,
I have been dating this girl for 3 years now.
Everything has been going great. Of course we have our little arguments here and there but nothing too serious.
Recently we have been arguing alot and we both decided to take a break.
She said she needed time and space to think things out. I also know she's REALLY stressed out at work.
I know and admitted to her that I did take her for granted. I didn't show her the attention and affection she deserved.
I saw her last night and she came back to my house to talk about everything. She said she still misses me but isn't sure if she loves me or not? I told her I apologize for not giving her the attention and affection she deserves. I told her I will change and I showed her... We cuddled for alittle and kissed for awhile. She also cried alittle bit while I was telling her this. I asked her if it made her happy hearing the things I'm gonna change about myself and she said "Yes". Anyways, I'm just curious as what I should do now?
She doesn't text me or respond to my phone calls lilke she use to. I know I hurt her and I apologized and showed and told her I am going to change.......What else can I do?
What should I do?
Thanks everybody.

Quickly talk to her on a phone and ask her to go to dinner then porpose to her maby she is juist wondering what is talking you so long to do that!

[angel0772001]

Good I'm happy for you. Good luck

[ISneezeFunny]

quickly talk to her on a phone and ask her to go to dinner then porpose to her maby she is juist wondering what is talking you so long to do that!

... not sure what fantasy world you're living in kiddo... we don't randomly get down on one knee and propose to appease someone.. . kinda... difficult.

[angel0772001]

...not sure what fantasy world you're living in kiddo...we don't randomly get down on one knee and propose to appease someone. ...kinda...difficult.

Thank you. I don't know why someone would do that. It doesn't make things better it just could possibly hurt them even more if your not ready for that yet.

[talaniman]

I have been dating this girl for 3 years now.

I can very well see her anger, and frustration at him, that he hasn't shown a willingness to include her in his future, with some type of commitment.
3 years is a long time to date and be in LIMBO!!!

Not that I'm recommending marriage by any means, but after all that free milk, the cows get tired of waiting for the farmer to build a barn.

[EasyDoesIt]

[QUOTE=talaniman]he hasn't shown a willingness to include her in his future, with some type of commitment.
3 years is a long time to date and be in LIMBO!!!
QUOTE]

Hey, well I did show a willingness to be with her. I would always talk about our future together. There were just sometimes I admit I didn't show her the affection I should have.
I think that's do to her actions sometimes. Her mom is a very strict christian. She won't let her go on vacation with me. She won't let her sleep over. And I started not showing her affection when all she did was hang out with her gf's. And to be honest... most of her gf's
Have messed up lives, ruined relationships and they hang around the same
Dive bars and drink everyday. For the first 2 years she wasn't around them that much. Now she is and I see a HUGE change. I just want to know where she stands. She said yesterday "I'm still thinking things threw" I should find everything out this Sunday.

[Ash123]

You need to think too.

Does this really work for you.

[EasyDoesIt]

I am seriouslly thinking about everything... Even though we are on a break, I'm still very considerate and respectful towards her feelings... She's being very rude and inconsiderate of me. Ex: I would txt her just to say hi and that I miss her and ask how she was doing... I wouldn't get a response for 3 days. I would txt her again and say hi. Nothing... Then she finally contacts me and I don't reply within 3 hours and she writes "I know you dont wanna say anything to me" or "Don't you wanna talk 2 me now".
Right now I'm just stuck in the middle... She said she is still thinking things through...
I just want to know where we stand, but she's so confused... She says she's not seeing anybody else but I don't know... HOpefully we talk about everything on Sunday... unless she cancels on me which I would be very dissapointed

[angel0772001]

It seems to me that this web site is making you doubt what you have for her. You need to stay strong if that's what you want to do. She seems to be very important in you life otherwise you wouldn't have came her for advice on how to get her back. Now everyone is asking if she is even worth it. IF SHE Wasn't WORTH IS HE Wouldn't BE ASKING US TO HELP HIM GET HER BACK!! Be supportive for him.

[talaniman]

All right I have heard enough! You need a new g/f. One that gives you what you need, and respects you too! I asked you was she worth it, and to me all this drama, and stringing you along while she thinks about it, ain't love, but some kind of sick twisted game she is playing with her hang out friends, to prove who is calling the shots, in this relationship.

In all the healthy relationships I have ever seen, the partners work together to solve their problems, with caring and sharing, not I am still thinking things thru. BULL CRAP, and no man with dignity, and self respect, goes for that, like everything is your fault. I don't think so, and your letting your guilt and fear of being dumped, reduce you to being willing puppy when she wants you.

Let her think it through by herself, with no influence from you, and let her g/f's take her out. Sorry guy, don't mean to be harsh, but if you've been that bad to deserve this kind of disrespect, she would have left, and not given you a thought. This needs resolving, and needs to be confronted and dealt with. Ain't that much love in the world, to make you kiss up to her, while she thinks it thru.

Take all the blame you want, but stand up for yourself.

[EasyDoesIt]

Well... She came over lastnight... and we had a great time!
She was just a COMPLETELY different person... We laughed, We had fun.
She even said "Your more important to me than my family".
She did a complete 180. I'm happy, but at the same time alilttle hesitant as to why a sudden change like that. But things are worked out. She apologized for things she did and said she will work on them and I did the same.
I did realize that lastnight was the only night she left her cell phone in her car... Is that a bit suspicous or am I just reading too much into that?

[Ash123]

you need to think too.

does this really work for you.

Not to be a broken record but make sure you want this for more than just winning her back. Think about it.
She is on her best behavior and so are you.

Sooooo, don't forget to TALK about the issues that separated you (attention, friends, etc.) NOW.

.

[EasyDoesIt]

Well... The truth came out... She came over again today... I just still felt like she was lying to me... I took a look at her cell phone and saw one of her text messages to her gf's... She slept with some other guy 3 days ago. I know the dude and he really is a loser... I told her to get the hell out of my house... She cried, said she was sorry, that it was a HUGE mistake and that she needs me and that she's a better person with me.
She said I'm her world... and that she'll do anything to get me bacl... Does everyone agree with me that I should kick her to the curb and move on??
I would love your advice on this.
Thanks everyone

[ISneezeFunny]

Now you know.

Move on. What other choice do you have?