[J_9]

I’m going to be very blunt. Your behavior is borderline stalker-ish. Learning the hard way shouldn’t take 2 years! Delete him from your phone. Block him from social media so that you aren’t triggered by his posts.

[smoothy]

I agree with J_9, I've been through this with a woman who couldn't take no for an answer a lot of years ago. Just from what you have said... speaking as a guy,, it shows he really isn't interested in a relationship, but he's trying to be nice about it and stay friends... keep pushing him and you won't even have that. If its not enough, then you really need to stop talking to him at all. Being he lives in another country.. that would be easy, you don't live next door to each other. Bust as was mentioned..its been two years....you should be through that already....I only had to deal with it for 6 months before she got the message....and that was 5 months too long. Speaking as someone who has been in his situation.....(I recognize how he's reacting) there is no easy way to say this to someone infatuated with you whom you do not dislike enough to not care how they take it. Its an awkward position to be in for BOTH people....if you both would like to be friends after and would be happy with that. That in itself is probably the hardest single lesson to learn about relationships with other people because there are so many ways to screw it up and make enemies rather than dial it back and stay friends.

[Fr_Chuck]

I agree, to be blunt, I have had a women I ended up calling the police on. Time to delete them from all social media and move on with a real life.

[talaniman]

The good news, letting go is hard for you, but you eventually get there. The bad news, once you give your heart away you don't want to take it back, and all you get as a result from it is a case of self reinforced FALSE HOPE. Yeah been reading your posts a long time haven't I? Watching you grow is fascinating, and you could take some time to reread your old posts and I am sure you will be fascinated by your own growth too.

Not going full NO CONTACT has always been your issue until you get sick and tired of the misery, and confusion. Don't be to hard on yourself. Takes most of us a long time and many experiences to know how to let go and heal, so you are hardly alone in that.

Thanks a lot for being brave enough to share your experience with us.

[broken_ heart]

Tal... thanks for always being there for me in all my problems and guiding me... yes I have issues with letting go of things and people I consider close to my heart... but anyhow... I don't have his contact now .so even if I want to I cant text him... until he texts me... J9 I'm not a stalker and I'm nt following him day and night... in past 2 years I texted him only on his birthday last year and that time too... I was not expecting anything from him... but he replied with so much affection that it made me feel the same for him again... still I controlled... but he continued to be like that for our next few conversations till... I decided to forget about whatever bad moments of issues we had... and then I texted him on new year... and from there he started ignoring me... im not following him... its just his on and off behaviour... once too loving (which I never expected from him) and the ignoring me and then replying me... waa making me anxious... still while this was happening... I kept myself reminding that he is not for me... he is not interested... last when he ddnt reply to my hello... ddnt even bother to open my text... I was sure and decide to never to talk to him again... keeping that thing in my mind I said him bye... assuming that we are parting now forever... but then again when he read bye from me... he replied... I still don't understand where was wrong... he himself was planning to meet... we had good conversation for an hour or so few days before new year and nothing in between... then what happened... which made him ignore me... quiet strange... one day you plan to meet... b extra nice and other day you ignore.. anyway I don't want to look for reasons now... it has come to an end... and I cant contact him... may be we are not meant to be for each other...

Anyway thank you all of u.. For investing your time to read my post and reply with your helpful advices...

Tal... hope one day I will learn to let go of people easily in my life...

Thank you again...

[Oliver2011]

" I'm not going to contact him anymore.."

Me thinks you will but the proof is always in the pudding. And I love pudding.

I agree with Alty - what have you done to find happiness regardless of him? People should allow no one to control happiness or contentment.