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talaniman · Apr 23, 2007, 07:30 AM

Hmmm, I guess the grass was not as green as he thought it was, and he btter keep you in his life just in case. Please don't fall for his tired excuses. Think the next time he sees a new pasture, he won't go checking it out? He sure will and you know it. He kicked you to the curb so stay away from him and his game.

confused11 · Apr 24, 2007, 11:22 PM

OK. HE KEEPS ON CALLING! Today I hung out with his best friend, who also happens to be a good friend of mine, so while we were at the movies, my ex calls and wants to know how come I didn't invite him and that its not nice. And I replied with well you breaking up with me wasn't nice either. Then I asked him why he wanted to hang out and he said just to hang out. I told him I couldn't do that and just like that he said OK and bye. That was the whole conversation but this is like the 4th time in 3 days he's called. Last time he called because he wanted to go to my soccer game and now he wants to go to the movies. But when I ask him why he says its just to hang out. I can't just hang out with him because Im still in love with him. I really don't know, what should I do? Should I hang out with him?

mckenzie134 · Apr 25, 2007, 01:34 AM

Noyou shouldn't be hanging out with him, you shouldn't even be talking to him. His going to stuff you around and he is going toget back with you and then when he finds another hottie he will put you on the side again. Anyone who takes a break for a reason other than to think about the relationship for a normal reason saying they are evaluatng where it may be going well you could take them back. Ut are you going to wake up he chose another girl over you, If he really wanted you he would not have done that. It doesn't matter how many times people tell you this you won't get it, he left for someone else and will definitely do it again at some stage if you give him the chance, the onlyreason he is being so nice now is because he does no have you. You are forgetting the major issue here he left you for someone else. There isn't no going back... I know you may love him but do you want to be his go back to girl while your married. If you think things are going to change your not in the real world. You'll have kids one day and he will be rooting the neighbour. Move on I'm sure youcan find a genuine guy. Sounds hard and difficult now but when you find someone you will understand what I mean and say to yourself thankgod I left him I was blinded. I always say tomyself even if you love someone if they don't love you back walk away it will only lead to heartache and dissapointment for you. Good luck.I have beeninyour position before my ex leftfor another guy and I was so upset and then she came back I was still in love I thought she was the greatest in the world then she did it again andagain so I was out. I then met moved on and found out most people are not like that so much beter out there.

talaniman · Apr 25, 2007, 04:20 AM

what should I do? Should I hang out with him?

His fling must be over, so he calls you, and as you see it works to confuse you, and your thinking about him and being with him. Don't fall for that old game, and give him a chance to weasel his way back in your life. Why should you, since your life is getting better. At least it was until you heard from him again. Stop answering his calls, and send a real message that you are not Miss Easy, and you have moved to better things.

confused11 · Apr 25, 2007, 09:31 AM

Yeah you guys are right. I think I'm just going to tell him to leave me alone. This is so hard.:(

sarlar1 · May 1, 2007, 12:22 PM

Im going through the same thing as we speak my boyfriend of a year broke up with me after we were living together and said he didn't want a g/f for a really long time but now he's seeing some girl that he works with its bs and he won't even be my friend

confused11 · May 1, 2007, 12:27 PM

Originally Posted by sarlar1

Im going through the exact same thing as we speak my boyfriend of a year broke up with me after we were living together and said he didnt want a g/f for a really long time but now hes seeing some girl that he works with its bs and he wont even be my friend

Yup. Mine did the same thing. He broke up with me, told me he wanted to be single, that there wouldn't be anyone in his life for a long time blah blah blah, then literrally two days later he is dating some girl from work... the funny thing is that the girl ended up just using him to make her ex boyfriend jealous because now she is back with him and my ex is all alone. And he's recently been calling me a lot to hang out but I want nothing to do with him.

sarlar1 · May 1, 2007, 12:36 PM

You shouldn't hang out with him, Im young and probably don't know a lot about guys but there all about the game, they want what they can't have, don't answer his calls, and when you feel like talking to him think about it, wheres it going to get you? No where except probably more upset

SAB123 · May 1, 2007, 12:41 PM

I'm A guy and I'm not all about games. My ex fiancé broke up with me 5-6 times now she was all about games. But you can't say they are all like that.

sarlar1 · May 1, 2007, 12:43 PM

I know Im sorry let me rephrase that, a lot of guys are about the game, but so are the girls. I just thought I actually found the one that would never hurt me and I was proved wrong, Im just going through a hard time

SAB123 · May 1, 2007, 12:46 PM

And yes I would move on because this guy will probably do it again. Don't fall into his games.

sarlar1 · May 1, 2007, 12:52 PM

Are you talking about me or confused?

SAB123 · May 1, 2007, 12:52 PM

Originally Posted by sarlar1

I know Im sorry let me rephrase that, a lot of guys are about the game, but so are the girls. I just thought I actually found the one that would never hurt me and I was proved wrong, Im just going through a hard time

I don't blame you one bit I know what you are going thr and the hurt will go away in time it's been 3 months since my ex broke up with me again and the hurt is gone I still think of her, But listen to every one on here. Buy listening to people on here I'm strong enough not to take my selfish ex fiancé back.

sarlar1 · May 1, 2007, 12:54 PM

Its very hard though, I didn't have any friends for a year cause I gave everything away for him, and I don't want to bad talk him because he really really is a great guy, maybe it was me that did something wrong

SAB123 · May 1, 2007, 12:54 PM

Originally Posted by sarlar1

are you talking about me or confused?

Talking about confused11 and if you are going through same thing I guess you too.

SAB123 · May 1, 2007, 12:58 PM

I also gave up a lot for my ex hanging out friends doing thing I like to do. And before I answer you I'll have to read your thread.

confused11 · May 1, 2007, 02:03 PM

My ex is definitely about games. When he broke up with me he told me that we can still be friends and hang out and just because he feels like this now he might feel different in a few weeks and he still loves me more then anything but is not in love with me. It all just didn't make any sense. He basically wanted to date this other girl and still have me waiting in the background in case it didn't work out with her. Well the last week or so he's called me a bunch of times and asked me to hang out, he wanted to go to my soccer games and wanted to go to the movies and stuff like that I kept on saying no, and when I asked him why he wanted to hang out he said it was just to be friends. I can't just be friends with him because I still love him and its easy for him to be my friend because he is probably over me. But anyway, the other day I had to call him to ask him something important and he doesn't even bother picking up the phone or calling me back when I call him, so its just a big game to him and I'm not falling for it anymore.

confused11 · May 1, 2007, 03:59 PM

Well speaking of my ex. He called me today. About 3 times. I finally picked up the phone to see what he wanted. We ended up talking for about an hour and it was really really nice. He told me that he misses having me around and that his heart was broken too and he wanted to know how I was doing and he was just really nice. Is he possibly having second thoughts? And if so how do I tell and what do I do?

sypher373 · May 1, 2007, 04:09 PM

Originally Posted by confused11

well speaking of my ex. he called me today. about 3 times. i finally picked up the phone to see what he wanted. we ended up talking for about an hour and it was really really nice. he told me that he misses having me around and that his heart was broken too and he wanted to know how I was doing and he was just really nice. Is he possibly having second thoughts? and if so how do I tell and what do I do?

I see that there could be one of two things going on..

It is possible that he does miss you, he wanted to be your friend, you said so yourself. Its probably tough for him to accept that you cannot be friends with him, and he misses having you as his friend. Im sure during the relationship you could have seen yourself as best friends, and he is missing that friend in you. That does not mean that he wants you back.

It is also possible that he is "playin a game" beucase he realizes that your no longer sitting on the sideline waiting for him to come back to you. It scares him that you are moving on, and he wants to know that he still has control over you.

Its really hard to say what he is thinking, as no one really knows but him. All I can suggest is that no matter what you do, be very careful. You said yourself that he likes games, and you don't want to fall prey to that again...

Just because the shock of not having you around anymore hurts him DOES NOT necessarily mean he wants you back.

confused11 · May 1, 2007, 04:30 PM

Yeah you are totally right. I'm not going to get my hopes up and I'm not going to do anything different. I'm going to continue to try to move on, he already knows that I cannot just be his friend and the next time we talk I'm pretty much going to tell him that he either wants to get back together or he needs to let me go so I can continue to move on. The way he was speaking today though kind of made me think he wanted me back. He was saying how its hard to find girls like me who like sports and video games and etc and how he misses waking up with someone. When I asked him what happened with the other girl at work, he pretty much said that she liked him more then he liked her and he really wasn't that into her, he pretty much said she was fun to look at and that's it. He made it pretty clear that though he could be with someone, he is not... so I don't know. He said he would call me soon, so we will see. I'm not going to jump into anything. Thank you so much for the advice. Really appreciate it.