Need some help

Krs · May 11, 2006, 06:31 AM

Oh I see, well there always a time for our first experience in anything, being good or bad. Its not the end of world.
Keep yourself busy, go out with your mates and enjoy being single when the right girl will come along you will know it.

Where there's a will there's a way ;)

Good luck

Krs · May 11, 2006, 06:58 AM

Me too talaniman :)

Wildcat21 · May 11, 2006, 09:37 AM

Screw the friend thing unless you ALWAYS want to be friends. I'd cut off ALL contact with her - it makes her MISS YOU, you will get your power back,

I have a feeling you became a little bit of a Wuss/nice guy? To nice, too needy? - happens a lot in 1st time relationships.

Don't talk with her... work on yourself... work out

Go to AskMen.com - Free Men's Online Magazine - read EVERY article on dating and relationships. EVERY article.

Go to Love Tactics - Love Tactics Home - you will get some strong advice there. Scroll to the bottom... you'll see they recommend no contact for at least 2 months.

Skell · May 11, 2006, 07:55 PM

Please read all the previous posts again. From the start. You can't be friends with her if you want her back. NO CONTACT at all. Being friends is keeping you there.
Please.. we aren't trying to tell you anything that won't help. Learn from my mistakes. I tried to make it work and it only pushes them away. You need to get out of her life. She won't forget you and if she does then she def wasn't worth it was she.
She doesn't need you anymore, at least for the moment. It is just easy for her to have you as a friend but it will be impossible for you to simply have her as a friend and it will kill you in the process.
Do yourself a favour and move on. Its not to say it may never work again but right now you are only digging a hole for yourself that will get harder and harder to get out of.
Not trying to mean but unfortunately it is the truth.. and it hurts. Cry for a while but then you will be OK and find other things to do. It gets easier believe it or not.
Good luck!

whatthe??? · May 12, 2006, 04:22 AM

Well I told her yesterday that I need some time away right now and she repsected that but proceeded to email me three times. It is tough not to talk to her but I am trying. We also work together at times so that may be diffucult.

talaniman · May 12, 2006, 05:02 AM

You have to realise that first she is a teenager second working together you will have to find a way of dealing with her,since she really has done nothing wrong there is no reason for you to be anything but nice. Those workplace romances have a way of putting a lot of undo pressure on those that engage in them. Good luck!:cool:

s_cianci · May 12, 2006, 06:43 AM

I think you sort of answered your own question at the end of your post. Other than that, have you tried talking to her honestly and upfront about your concerns? She may feel like she's ready to move on at this point. Granted, a year is a rather long time to spend with someone and then seemingly abruptly lose interest ; if it had been a month instead then your situation would make a lot more sense. However, she's still young (19, compared to your 31) and may not be ready for anything permanent just yet. Try talking to her and see how she responds. I know you don't want to lose her but be prepared for that possibility.

Wildcat21 · May 12, 2006, 08:10 AM

No contact means no contact - you shouldn't have even said you needed time - it's more powerful if you just cut it off. Say - "ok bye, what ever you want" and leave - no more contact. Set them free.

Wildcat21 · May 12, 2006, 08:10 AM

I am sure returned those e-mails - big mistake.

valinors_sorrow · May 12, 2006, 02:49 PM

Takes two to keep the game going.. .

Wildcat21 · May 12, 2006, 02:52 PM

They work together? - well you say hi. And limit the conversation to no more than that - if that. You can't act DESPERATE. Smile - always.

amandarena · May 12, 2006, 03:09 PM

I'm 22 and I have been with the same guy for the past 4 years. Use to we where always togather. So I know from my experence with him you can get tired of always being with the same person and doing the same things. It could be as simple as she wants some time alone and wants to spend more time with her friends. Its always simpler just to ask her what she really wants.

talaniman · May 12, 2006, 03:09 PM

Wildcat-Sorta thought you'd say that,very good advice!:cool:

whatthe??? · May 13, 2006, 04:25 AM

Well I was nothing but nice to her at work we talked about work and a little about her school. Never brought up anything about us. For the second straight night she sat at home alone. I have been doing other things and haven't been home a lot this week. She also post a blog that she was glad this happened. Is she just trying to piss me off more or do you think she is having second thoughts already?

talaniman · May 13, 2006, 05:37 AM

What difference does it make if your moving on with your life?:cool: :eek: