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hjpan · May 31, 2008, 05:09 AM

Originally Posted by liz28

You're using the wrong set of words. Never say you"cant", because you can.

Your mind is playing tricks on you. Stop talking to her mother for the time being because it will only make you remember the past.

Visualize life without her not with. When she is in your head force your mind to push her out.

If you keep continue the way your going, it will lead to depression. Part of get over someone is realizing the relatinship is over and then take it a day at a time.

How long has it been now? Your mother, friends, and people on here gave you some good advice, so use it, if you truly want to get over her.

Thanks~ I am doing my best to avoid contact with her.

hjpan · May 31, 2008, 05:10 AM

Originally Posted by rnfowl

Congrats to staying faithful to her even though you could have been different. This shows what type of person you are and in the future relationship you come into, continue to be the person you are and be faithful. Someday you will find the right one, and when you do you want to have been faithful to her. Trust is a big issue and sounds like you can be trusted. You sound like you are a strong person. Keep your head lifted and keep smiling. You are going through a rough patch but smoother roads lie ahead.

I do not understand why but all my friends, both males and females, tell me that I am the perfect guy for a lot of girls.. =/

But, I have only had one serious relationship and this is it.

talaniman · May 31, 2008, 05:19 AM

But, I have only had one serious relationship and this is it.

If you get busy, and be proactive in your healing, you can change that. Don't mean to be harsh, but you get nowhere in life waiting for it to happen. You have to get off your butt, and adjust your life to living without her, and regroup. When she sneaks in your head, get up and do something to change your focus. Its about the ACTION you take on your own behalf.
And for gosh sakes, why are you talking to HER mother? Not a good idea at all.

liz28 · May 31, 2008, 05:37 AM

Life is not over and you will have more relationship, some will come to a end and some or one will last.

When you become involve with someone there no guarantee it will last. If it don't you reflect back on it and think and say"oh well her lost".

When your with someone look at actions whether words, think with your mind whether than your heart, things you have common goals they want to achieve, always follow your instincts.

So take a class like karate, to help relief some on the stress. It will also help you think with a clearer mind. Again what don't kill you makes you stronger. Also, delete any text/voice messages you have from her, pictures as well, you don't need reminders. If she have anything at your house, as simple as a shirt throw it away.

hjpan · May 31, 2008, 05:54 AM

Thank you all.

I will get more help =]

hjpan · May 31, 2008, 04:08 PM

any more ideas :)?

hjpan · May 31, 2008, 07:01 PM

I talked to my sister and she said to give my ex space & time. No contact or communication at all.

Sikativ · May 31, 2008, 07:07 PM

That's good.
Reread your own thread and you will see some helpful tips that you might have previously overlooked.

-Sik

hjpan · May 31, 2008, 07:46 PM

Originally Posted by Sikativ

That's good.
Reread your own thread and you will see some helpful tips that you might have previously overlooked.

-Sik

Thank you :)

I also just got off the phone with my mom; her best friend is a shaman so I asked my mom to ask her best friend the situation.

It's pretty confidential, but it has something to do with my karma :O

Sik, thank you for your help~ I'll keep updating the situation :)

bigbird213 · May 31, 2008, 11:50 PM

Originally Posted by hjpan

I talked to my sister and she said to give my ex space & time. No contact or communication at all.

PLEASE do this.

Just don't do this hoping to win her back. It Won't work.

hjpan · Jun 1, 2008, 02:03 AM

Originally Posted by bigbird213

PLEASE do this.

Just don't do this hoping to win her back. It WONT work.

Ok..

hjpan · Jun 1, 2008, 04:15 AM

How long did it take to cope the situation for those who were in my position...?

talaniman · Jun 1, 2008, 06:19 AM

That depends on how well you apply yourself and how bad you want to move on.
Those that can accept what has happened, and are through mourning, can move on quite fast. The whole thing is what you do to cope with your own feelings. That's where many get stuck for so long.
Learn what to do with yourself in these situations and you will learn a valuable life lesson.

ka1111 · Jun 1, 2008, 07:48 AM

Originally Posted by talaniman

Learn what to do with yourself in these situations and you will learn a valuable life lesson.

Vague..

liz28 · Jun 1, 2008, 08:25 AM

You need to live by your own signature because Arthea Franklin saids it best. Stick to the words of the song and let that song be your motto.

Everyone is different and it mostly depends on that person mind set. Once you accept that its over you can get over it with patience.

bigbird213 · Jun 1, 2008, 08:34 AM

Originally Posted by ka1111

Vague..

The answer to this has been given over and over in this thread and others. You need to understand what happened, accept the breakup occurred, and know what your part in it was. You then need to get busy, move on, and try to see life beyond that person.

The four stickies at the top of the main page have TONs of suggestions and guidance on all of this. In fact, I believe there is one called "What to do after a breakup..."

talaniman · Jun 1, 2008, 09:03 AM

Originally Posted by talaniman
Learn what to do with yourself in these situations and you will learn a valuable life lesson.

In knowing yourself its much easier to know how to act, and react, to what life throws at you. Knowing yourself, makes it much easier to make a decision for yourself, and what you want, and need, which are two different things, and what right and wrong for you. Knowing yourself, allows you to grow, be happy and healthy, and confident.

As you learn more you grow more.:cool:

hjpan · Jun 1, 2008, 03:13 PM

Thank you all =]

Anyone know tips to get my life pattern back on again?
I sleep less than 6 hours or I sleep and wake up every two to four hours..
I eat really little; stopped eating for two days minimum.
My focus is out of range =/

bigbird213 · Jun 1, 2008, 03:46 PM

Maybe instead of trying to get your pattern back you should work at creating a new pattern. Having a new pattern will allow you to feel as if your life is taking a large turn, for the better. If you remove the regular patterns from your life, you won't miss (as much) the other parts of your pattern, like her.

hjpan · Jun 1, 2008, 05:01 PM

Originally Posted by bigbird213

Maybe instead of trying to get your pattern back you should work at creating a new pattern. Having a new pattern will allow you to feel as if your life is taking a large turn, for the better. If you remove the regular patterns from your life, you won't miss (as much) the other parts of your pattern, like her.

Oh :O~