[rileyma]

One question I never asked myself while I was going the hell you're going through and micro-analyzing every email and wondering how to get her to miss me and come back was this: even if she came back, would you ever feel secure in the relationship again? Once she shows you that she can walk away from you, you will always be wondering whether she'll walk away again. Don't make the same mistake I did and overfocus on the present. Dig deep and think hard and realistically about a future with this girl if she ever did come back and how you would honestly feel.

I agree. I think that we focus so much on getting them back that we forget what we're going to do if we actually do. However, you do have to be confident that she went away for a reason. Some times it is a healthy thing to go away, date others and then come back together that much more sure. I think we get our feelings hurt so much that they are wanting to venture out that we forget what the benefits might be. There are many people who break-up, get back together and eventually get married.

I do believe that this "break-up" thing can only happen once though. You can't be having multiple breakups, otherwise there does come a point where you're always wondering when the next time is going to be.

Just do yourself a favor and "Hope for the best....expect the worst". Live your life and date others. This is your time for making sure that she's the one too.

[dachampishere]

I agree 100% with your answers! Believe it or not I'm glad I found this forum, cause its let me see that I'm not the only one that is going through some tought/similar times right now.

For my situation, I truly believe that she just needs to figure something's out in her head doesn't want to be in a relationship. Does she love me or care about me? I don't know and I can't worry about it. I just know right now I'm going to Love Myselft first! If in the future for some reason she comes back and things work out then it was meant to be. If not then I know there is someone out there better who will appreciate what I have to offer.

The pain will go away with time and I know this. Its been a little over a month and I still have days when I just hit rock bottom and feel like crap. But only time can heal a broken heart.

Right now its time for me to grow, enjoy life, and have a good time!