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posaunus · Jul 28, 2014, 06:56 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

What does that mean?

We love each other different than we love friends and family.

smoothy · Jul 28, 2014, 06:57 PM

I'd really be worried if you was thinking about having sex with someone you thought of LIKE friends and family.

posaunus · Jul 28, 2014, 07:01 PM

Originally Posted by smoothy

I'd really be worried if you was thinking about having sex with someone you thought of LIKE friends and family.

Well, yeah... I don't think of her like friends and family though...

smoothy · Jul 28, 2014, 07:10 PM

I'm thinking English might not be your first langauge even though it is very good (by the way you are responding to some of the nuanced things I said), and you might not be in the same part of the world the rest of us live in, what country are you from? That might explain a lot of things that aren't making sense to us. Including giving us a hint of the cutlure you are from.

Homegirl 50 · Jul 28, 2014, 07:34 PM

You guys have only been dating for 4 months. This "love each other very much" is not real. How often did you see each other before she moved?

posaunus · Jul 28, 2014, 07:38 PM

Originally Posted by smoothy

I'm thinking English might not be your first langauge even though it is very good (by the way you are responding to some of the nuanced things I said), and you might not be in the same part of the world the rest of us live in, what country are you from? That might explain a lot of things that aren't making sense to us. Including giving us a hint of the cutlure you are from.

I live in the US...
What things that I am saying are not making sense??

Originally Posted by Homegirl 50

You guys have only been dating for 4 months. This "love each other very much" is not real. How often did you see each other before she moved?

How would you know that our love is "not real".. I assure you it is very real...
And I saw her basically every day...

smoothy · Jul 28, 2014, 07:45 PM

Originally Posted by posaunus

Well, yeah... I don't think of her like friends and family though...

When you said this... mostly by the addition of the last word "though" which made it really awkward.

Also this is very non-typical behaviour for a guy born and raised here. You would be thinking about it all the time... and trying to get it all the time even if you were so awkward you wouldn't succeed as most guys are when they first start to date. And I wasn't even the biggest skirt chaser in my class by a longshot.

posaunus · Jul 28, 2014, 07:50 PM

Originally Posted by smoothy

When you said this... mostly by the addition of the last word "though" which made it really awkward.

Also this is very non-typical behaviour for a guy born and raised here. You would be thinking about it all the time... and trying to get it all the time even if you were so awkward you wouldn't succeed as most guys are when they first start to date. And I wasn't even the biggest skirt chaser in my class by a longshot.

I only said though cause I thought in the previous response, you were suggesting that I DID think of her as friends or family...

And you don't know me. I do want to eventually do that with her. But we have gone WAAAYYY off topic.

smoothy · Jul 28, 2014, 08:03 PM

Ok on that first point... simple misunderstanding that got compounded.

THat second point isn't far off topic... because if you REALLY thought that that way it indicated a far different thought process than was normal... You asked a question... we are sorting through this to see how you think, and see how you react... from that we can give a better answer.

talaniman · Jul 28, 2014, 08:21 PM

I believe you guy but lets get back to the real issue here and that's seeing your girl, and doing it within the rules of her parents. If you love her, then catching a bus, riding a bike, or even walking are good alternatives to no car. If its love as you say, asking your parents for a ride would be no problem. So buck up and do what you have to do to see your girl.

Man up and make it happen and stop the crying over this.

DoulaLC · Jul 29, 2014, 12:50 AM

Are you her first boyfriend? Knowing you for just 4 months, I can understand her parents wanted supervision when seeing each other. You know, you can go to the movies with her and her parents... you don't have to sit right next to them or see the same movie. Or maybe they can drop the two of you off at the movies then pick you up.

As was said, 20 minutes isn't very far, I know kids who go to the same school who live that far and farther apart, although I understand how it may feel that way if you had been seeing each other just about everyday.

Whatever you do, if you love her as you say, you won't say or do anything to try and get her to go against her parents' wishes.

Keep in mind that while you both are having strong feelings for each other at this time, you can't control how feelings might change. Part of dating is spending time with someone and learning what works for you and what doesn't. This is why most people date different people before they find someone that suits them best. It would be hard to understand that now when the two of you are in a new relationship. Just be aware that if either of you does decide it's not going to work, it is not a reflection on the other person. It is just part of dating and maturing. Don't panic about what may or may not happen.....just enjoy the time that you can spend together getting to know each other better.

Do seek out other help for yourself. One doctor may not work for you, but another will. If you had diabetes, and didn't get help from a doctor, would you not go seek out another until you got the help that you needed? Only once you have your emotions and behavior dealt with will you be able to be part of a healthy relationship.

Homegirl 50 · Jul 29, 2014, 07:15 AM

4 months, you guys don't really know each other and you have an unhealthy attachment to her. This business of being afraid she will fall for someone else because she is 20 minutes away is a bit over the top. Get some help for your depression and cutting issues. If you really want to see her man up and ask your parents for a ride.