[ecky]

Therapists don't get mad. That's why they exist!
Much more than that, of course. They help you get your thoughts and feelings into words, and guide you to some solutions for how to approach life and deal with how you feel, who you are.

I don't know I feel like my mum would get mad and plus I don't have money or the confidence to speak to a theropist or I would have ages ago and why do you want to know my name ?

[talaniman]

Originally Posted by ecky
I have never had a role model I can't stand both my biological or mystep dad

Why??

[ecky]

Why???

I don't know my biological dad and my step dad is a ***** to me

[joypulv]

I don't want to know your name. 'Finding out who you are' is an expression, meaning getting all the confusion sorted out and having a sense of what you want in life - who you are.

[ecky]

I don't want to know your name. 'Finding out who you are' is an expression, meaning getting all the confusion sorted out and having a sense of what you want in life - who you are.

Yeah I red it wrong I thought you said who are you but you said who you are I know what I want In life but my head says different I wish I had the courage to go see a thoropist but I live in fear of what people think about me but I really don't want to end up a sick and twisted b****** as I have said I suffer from depresion aSewell and feel like I would rather die than to become one of them

[talaniman]

I can see your need to turn to someone who can answer your questions and be listened too. I recommend a counselor, teacher, that's trusted since getting a therapist on your own is a few years away. Or a coach if you play sports, or a youth group would be a good choice and a place to observe or learn good clean examples of manhood.

You have let guilt and resentment build up way too long and have to make some confident positive steps in your own behalf. Actually you are a normal kid that has yet to be embraced, who probably has great empathy to younger kids in the same boat.

[ecky]

I can see your need to turn to someone who can answer your questions and be listened too. I recommend a counselor, teacher, that's trusted since getting a therapist on your own is a few years away. Or a coach if you play sports, or a youth group would be a good choice and a place to observe or learn good clean examples of manhood.

You have let guilt and resentment build up way too long and have to make some confident positive steps in your own behalf. Actually you are a normal kid that has yet to be embraced, who probably has great empathy to younger kids in the same boat.

I don't get aroused but I feel my heart go. And in 17 were I live there is nothing for 17 year olds. I don't have many friends so I don't go out much apart from my gym and down town I used to be In cadets but that's it

[talaniman]

That's empathy, NOT lust. That's what I think. Your confusion comes from not knowing what to do about it. And a profound fear of being misjudged because of shame maybe? Shame and guilt will certainly lead to an isolation that stifles self confidence through accomplishment and fun for sure.

Being powerless to make change that works for you and lack of guidance can be overcome by setting a goal or direction and working toward it. Three actually, one for today, one for next week, and a three year goal that gets you what you really want.

So what do you want to happen today? This week? Start there and be thoughtful and reasonable.

[ecky]

That's empathy, NOT lust. That's what I think. Your confusion comes from not knowing what to do about it. And a profound fear of being misjudged because of shame maybe? Shame and guilt will certainly lead to an isolation that stifles self confidence thru accomplishment and fun for sure.

Being powerless to make change that works for you and lack of guidance can be overcome by setting a goal or direction and working toward it. three actually, one for today, one for next week, and a three year goal that gets you what you really want.

So what do you want to happen today? This week? Start there and be thoughtful and reasonable.

IDK its anxiety that keeps conning back I know how to controls it but it can over power me and that's when I try to kill myself

[talaniman]

Focus on the goal, not the obstacles and just say what you want. Just relax and think of just you, NOT the rest of the world.

[ecky]

Focus on the goal, not the obstacles and just say what you want. Just relax and think of just you, NOT the rest of the world.

Thanks for all your help I feel a little better now and surly will feel much better after a couple of days