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Cat1864 · May 2, 2011, 04:53 AM

That is part of the problem. You are looking for someone to tell you what to do each step of the way. However, you need to take charge. You need to determine what is the best way for you.

We can give you advice on what you should do, but we cannot live your life for you.

So far, it sounds like you have been a dutiful daughter and for the most part wife. Doing and accepting what others decide for you. I think rebellion may be part of the attraction that your classmate holds for you. Once you take control of your life, making decisions for yourself, I think you will see that the classmate is using both you and his girlfriend to get what he wants.

Can you answer these questions:
What do you want in life?
How do you get what you want?

Nadineblue · May 2, 2011, 08:44 AM

I want to be free and happiness. I want to live just for myself. I want to back to normal. I want to be successful in life. I want to be strong.

Alty · May 2, 2011, 08:48 AM

Originally Posted by Nadineblue

I want to be free and happiness. I want to live just for my self. I want to back to normal. I want to be successful in life. I want to be strong.

Then work on achieving those goals. How you go about it is up to you and only you.

Nadineblue · May 2, 2011, 12:09 PM

Ok tell me what am I going to do about the school part?

talaniman · May 2, 2011, 12:53 PM

Originally Posted by Nadineblue

Ok tell me what am i going to do about the school part?

"I want to be free and happiness. I want to live just for my self. I want to back to normal. I want to be successful in life. I want to be strong."

Then be strong and tell the guy to leave you alone. You can't just want something without doing what it takes to get it. Be strong, don't just say it!!

Alty · May 2, 2011, 03:25 PM

Originally Posted by Nadineblue

Ok tell me what am i going to do about the school part?

That's up to you. Part of being strong is making decisions for yourself, and not relying on others to tell you what to do.

You can do this. You can decide what you want your future to be. Your life is in your hands, and only your hands. We can't and won't tell you what to do, because we have no right to do that.

Take this step now. Be independent. Stop relying on other people to tell you how to live your life. Live it on your terms! That's how you become strong.

Nadineblue · May 2, 2011, 09:44 PM

Now, I want to talk to him for the last time and I will tell him that I can't be with him anymore. Even if its hard for me, it's the right thing to do but I will always love him.

Nadineblue · May 3, 2011, 02:43 AM

I talk to him and he said he love's me. He didn't leave his girlfreind because he did it for me because am married and everyone knows about it. So, he said he is cover me up until am divorce my husband. He cry so hard and I left him. What am I going to do now?

amicon · May 3, 2011, 03:27 AM

Heal from both relationships.

Start living your life and doing your own thing.

Study,make friends,actively work on moving on.

Cat1864 · May 3, 2011, 03:42 AM

You are going to survive. You are going to heal. You are going to move forward.

When you think about going back to him, keep firmly in your mind that he is using another person to get what he wants. He wants you so he is using her as a cover. How do you think it will make her feel if/when she finds out that she nothing more to him than an excuse? Do you want to be a part of making another female feel like that way?

I know you are probably hurting and confused right now. It will get better. Are there any clubs at school that you can get involved in? Do you have any hobbies or interests that can help occupy your mind?

talaniman · May 3, 2011, 03:58 AM

Originally Posted by Nadineblue

I talk to him and he said he love's me. He didnt leave his girlfriend because he did it for me because am married and everyone knows about it. So, he said he is cover me up until am divorce my husband. He cry so hard and i left him. What am i going to do now?

Ignore him, move on, and get your house in order, by handling your business with your husband, and start building the life you want in a good orderly fashion. Stop being distracted by silly side shows that only keep you from focusing on what's important for what you want.

No more excuses for bad behavior, or what everyone else is doing to you. Own your mistakes, and do better for yourself.

amicon · May 3, 2011, 03:59 AM

Then find things that interest yo;,we need to make an effort in life-things aren't just dropped into our laps,nor do people come knocking on our doors wanting to befriend us.

You've got to go out there and create a life for yourself.

anita37 · May 3, 2011, 04:14 PM

I think the best thing is to divorce him,then take time on yourself without a man and look back on your previous mistakes before moving on to anyone else...

Nadineblue · May 4, 2011, 09:51 PM

I didn't answer his phone calls and his text too. But I just can't thinking about him. I always see him at school.what should I do?

Alty · May 4, 2011, 10:16 PM

Originally Posted by Nadineblue

I didnt answer his phone calls and his text too. But i just can't thinking about him. I always see him at school.what should i do?

Nadine, no one said this would be easy. The first few days are the hardest. Yes, you keep thinking about him. He was a part of your life, in your head, and in your bed. It's hard to go cold turkey. The fact is, you're doing what's right for you, even if it hurts a bit.

What should you do? Continue concentrating on what's good for you and your life. Focus on getting a divorce. Concentrate on doing well in school. Concentrate on getting a good job. Concentrate on getting your own place to live. Concentrate on you.

You are what's important. You don't need a guy to make you important, or to make you feel special. All you need is you. So work on you. Look in a mirror and tell yourself that you're worth being loved for you. You're worth concentrating on. You don't need a man to make you feel worthy or safe. You need you!

You can do this. You just need to get past this bad part. After that it's smooth sailing.

Nadineblue · May 7, 2011, 07:55 AM

Am alone now. I can't trust no one. I hate all guys but I can't forget him. I always thinking about him. I always see him at class. What should I do.

amicon · May 7, 2011, 08:51 AM

You get active and start building a life you enjoy.

Alty · May 7, 2011, 10:59 AM

Originally Posted by Nadineblue

Am alone now. I can't trust no one. I hate all guys but I can't forget him. I always thinking about him. I always see him at class. What should i do.

You stop beating a dead horse, you stop posting the same question, and you read what we've written and follow our advice.

Nadineblue · May 7, 2011, 11:22 AM

I did. Am already on it. Am start living just by myself. I think your advice are working.

amicon · May 7, 2011, 11:25 AM

Then I wish you the best of luck-stay strong and have a happy life.