[tony71]

So we talked last night and it turns out she is still married to him and the reason is he doesn't want to pay for the divorce nor does she. But now she said she will need to come up with the money and get an attorney to get the divorce.

[answerme_tender]

Well isn't that convenient( hey did I just sound like the church lady) anyway-- that she just happens now to remember WHY she didn't mention that she was still MARRIED. So now you can add CHEATER to list you are keeping on her. What a excuse not to get divorced, what was she doing with all her stripper money? See there is nothing to worry about when it comes to thinking about her doing anything with her lap dance partners, she must not if been all that great, or she would have had money to get a divorce from her HUSBAND.

[smoothy]

I don't think she ever intends to get divorced... in fact I bet he doesn't even know she's fooling around. They still might even be living together and sleeping in the same bed.


Not just guys use that lame excuse.

[pissedgf]

I'm the girlfriend in question here. You have no idea how hurt and angry I was when I found this post. ***** everything about this. I put up with torture and emotional abuse from this guy for the past year on a daily basis. He treated me like I was nothing but trash while telling me the other girls he dated were better than me, obsessed over my past and threw it in my face every chance he got, went behind my back and made dates with other women because he said he felt justified because of my past, grilled me over every little minute detail of my previous sexual life to the point where it became sick, used my honesty against me while calling me a liar, forced me to stop talking to / hanging out with my friends because of his jealousy and control issues... God, and that's just the tip of the iceberg. The abuse was insane and constant. I know something's wrong with me because I stuck around for all of this. Even after he went to therapy it never got any better. I hate myself for letting someone treat me this way. He destroyed my life and tore down every shred of self-esteem that I had while pretending that he loved me.

[talaniman]

Wow, thank you for coming forward. I hope you took heart that most of us felt he was immature, and cruel, though we didn't know to what extent, and your input has nailed the coffin shut on that point of view.

Your coming forward shed light on situations like these, for others to learn from, and I hope learn from, as have you. I sincerely hope that you have put yourself on a healing path, and gotten all the love, support, and help you need to put this behind you, and move to healthier things.

I wish you luck, and any help, and support we can give you, and again thanks for enlightening us as to the true nature of this situation. Its not often we get the other side of things.

[Enigma1999]

I'm the girlfriend in question here. You have no idea how hurt and angry I was when I found this post. ***** everything about this. I put up with torture and emotional abuse from this guy for the past year on a daily basis. He treated me like I was nothing but trash while telling me the other girls he dated were better than me, obsessed over my past and threw it in my face every chance he got, went behind my back and made dates with other women because he said he felt justified because of my past, grilled me over every little minute detail of my previous sexual life to the point where it became sick, used my honesty against me while calling me a liar, forced me to stop talking to / hanging out with my friends because of his jealousy and control issues... God, and that's just the tip of the iceberg. The abuse was insane and constant. I know something's wrong with me because I stuck around for all of this. Even after he went to therapy it never got any better. I hate myself for letting someone treat me this way. He destroyed my life and tore down every shred of self-esteem that I had while pretending that he loved me.

I too thank you for sharing.

This is why I must be careful in answering questions about relationships.

There are two sides to every story, and we were just hearing his side.

This is quite interesting, and I haven't run into a situation like this before, where the girlfriend finds the post.

I'm glad that you realize what he was doing to you, and walked away.

There is nothing wrong with you for realizing, dealing with it, THEN to leave.

I wish you the best of luck.