[Stringer]

I have to admit that my first relationship (ahhh hmmm) was when I was 13 and she was an older woman... Aleen was 14. Her dad a Top Sargent in the Air Force caught us on his living room couch...

Funny because years later I was visiting home ( I lived in North Carolina at the time) and my first wife and another couple when dancing at a club. The ladies went to the 'powder room' and the guy went to check in our coats. While I was standing there Aleen came up to me and tickled my chest with her finger, smiled with very large sexy eyes and asked 'how are you babe?' I said 'married', she spun around and looking back said 'NOW you'll never know will you.'

[Kitkat22]

I think some parents have "dropped the ball" when it comes to doing the right thing. I've seen mothers and fathers nearly come to blows because of a softball game or one eleven year old made the cheer leading team and theirs didn't.

Mothers enter their six and seven year old daughters in a beauty contest and make them look like
Fifteen year olds.

Parents who would do anything just so their kids will be"popular".
It's a shame the TV shows make it look OK for a girl to look slutty.

It is a worry and seems as though the kids who are the ones who end up thinking it's OK to have sex at eleven years old and smoke and wear clothing that is beyond revealing. I wish they could see into the future and know how their actions are going to lead to consequences they never would have wanted.

[hheath541]

I think I only misled my mother once. It wasn't really lying. I had a choir concert. She thought I was leaving right after I sang. I told her I was staying to watch the rest of the choirs sing. Then I ended up going out to dinner with a couple friends. I was about 2 hours late getting home. She had the choir directors searching dumpsters for my body and had called the cops. I was grounded for a month.

I had an 9pm curfew on weekdays and 11pm on weekends when I was 16. When I turned 17, it got pushed BACK to 8pm on weekdays and 10pm on weekends, with the added limitation that I could only be on the phone for 2 hours a day. She had to know where I was, that there were adults present, and have a number to call.

She called the friends house I was at once, and scared the daylights out of one of my friends. She found out that the adult present wasn't a parent, it was the friend's 25 year old brother. She also happened to call when a group of us had gone about half a block away to grab ice cream cones. She screamed at my poor friend, almost making her cry, and made me get my boyfriend's brother to drive me home immediately.

I still cannot understand WHY I ended up with stricter rules the older I got and WHY I wasn't allowed to go not even a block away to get ice cream when I was 17. I was almost always home when I was supposed to be (with one or two exceptions when I was a little late). I never lied to her about where I was going or who would be there. I never drank or did drugs or had sex. I followed all her rules. Yet, for some reason, she didn't trust me.

I turned 18, and stopped asking for permission to go places. I'd tell her where I was going and when I'd be back. I'd call if plans changed and I was going to be home late. I was almost always with a fairly large group of friends. Our parties consisted of playing video games, watching movies, euchre, and singing along to musicals. There were no couples sneaking off to have sex or drinking or doing drugs. The most illicit thing that went on was cigarette smoking.

[justcurious55]

I was on the receiving end of one of those sort of phone calls once. Me and my friend would always say we were going to be with each other. I would say I was going to her house, she would say she was at mine. Sometimes we were actually together, others we just went to hang out with our own older groups of friends. Well, she didn't tell me she told her mom she was at my house. So her mom calls me at nearly midnight asking to speak to her daughter. I was speechless for a minute, but had to tell her I didn't know where she was. She'd gone over to a party at our co-workers house and got so drunk she lost track of time. Her mom was furious.

[Kitkat22]

My son and daughters always had a curfew. Even when they were in College and came home for the summer or for Holidays. They didn't care much for it but it didn't bother me at all.

I was known as the "Warden" staying up and making sure they hadn't been drinking or making sure they were home at the appointed time.

My husband and I agreed on the rules but I was more the enforcer.
He couldn't stand for the girls to cry when I told them they couldn't go to certain concerts. Didn't bother me. I had been to more than a few concerts in my younger days and I knew what happened at some. This was after I left home.

My son would go to his room and pout or play his guitar when he was mad. I was strict. I told them.. I'm your mother... you have friends.. Dads your dad... you have friends.

By that I mean a lot of parents want to be friends with their kids... not parents.

[Alty]

I lied all the time.

I had my first "serious" boyfriend at 14, we dated the entire summer. It was definitely more then holding hands and kissing, but what mom and dad didn't know wouldn't hurt them.

We saw each other every day. I'd say that I was going out with my friends, hop on my bike and go to his place. He was 16, had a car. I thought he was all that and ice cream on the side.

As it turns out, we're still friends, sadly he suffered from an aneurysm 11 years ago and now he can't walk and often doesn't remember who I am.

Chuck has a point. Kids don't look like kids anymore. You have to know there's something wrong with the world when stores sell thongs made for 5 year olds, so they won't have to worry about a panty line. I really want a list of the parents that by these!

When my daughter turned 5 my sister-in-law bought her makeup. No, it wasn't fun, play, dressup makeup, it was real makeup. I asked her why, her response "Well she's pretty, shouldn't she learn now how to highlight her features?" Why? For what purpose? She was five! I kept the makeup in my room for Halloween time.

One little girl in my sons class came to school the other day in a tank top and super short miniskirt. If I had been wearing it I would have had to shave, it was that short! She was sent home and a letter sent to her mom. Apparently the mother was upset that her daughter wasn't allowed to express herself by choosing what she wanted to wear to school. What is she expressing with that outfit, $25 for sex, $10 for a BJ? Ya, I'm being crude, but seriously, what is this mother teaching her child?

I realize that society plays a large role in all of this, but for goodness sake, they're kids, can't they just fill their days being kids, playing, getting dirty, flying kites, playing with dolls, riding their bikes to the park?

Seriously, as soon as the first boy calls my house asking for my daughter, we're moving to the middle of the woods where the closest neighbor is 300 miles away. ;)

[Kitkat22]

I lied all the time.

I had my first "serious" boyfriend at 14, we dated the entire summer. It was definitely more then holding hands and kissing, but what mom and dad didn't know wouldn't hurt them.

We saw eachother every day. I'd say that I was going out with my friends, hop on my bike and go to his place. He was 16, had a car. I thought he was all that and ice cream on the side.

As it turns out, we're still friends, sadly he suffered from an aneurysm 11 years ago and now he can't walk and often doesn't remember who I am.

Chuck has a point. Kids don't look like kids anymore. You have to know there's something wrong with the world when stores sell thongs made for 5 year olds, so they won't have to worry about a panty line. I really want a list of the parents that by these!

When my daughter turned 5 my sister-in-law bought her makeup. No, it wasn't fun, play, dressup makeup, it was real makeup. I asked her why, her response "Well she's pretty, shouldn't she learn now how to highlight her features?" Why? For what purpose? She was five! I kept the makeup in my room for Halloween time.

One little girl in my sons class came to school the other day in a tank top and super short miniskirt. If I had been wearing it I would have had to shave, it was that short! She was sent home and a letter sent to her mom. Apparently the mother was upset that her daughter wasn't allowed to express herself by choosing what she wanted to wear to school. What is she expressing with that outfit, $25 for sex, $10 for a BJ? Ya, I'm being crude, but seriously, what is this mother teaching her child?

I realize that society plays a large role in all of this, but for goodness sake, they're kids, can't they just fill their days being kids, playing, getting dirty, flying kites, playing with dolls, riding their bikes to the park?

Seriously, as soon as the first boy calls my house asking for my daughter, we're moving to the middle of the woods where the closest neighbor is 300 miles away. ;)

Alty.. I'm sorry but I'm seriously LOL at the shaving part ! But you're right. I was so glad when the dress code was enforced at the schools here a couple years ago.

[aimee_tt]

Good thing about australia is we have school uniforms. Although in high school some girls do wear minni skirts but other than a few dresses which are short in primary school (due to parental neglect) most children wear shorts under neath.

[Alty]

Good thing about australia is we have school uniforms. Although in high school some girls do wear minni skirts but other than a few dresses which are short in promary school (due to parental neglect) most children wear shorts under neath.

Only private schools have uniforms around here, and there aren't any in our area.

I don't have a problem with kids wearing their own clothes, but there should be a dress code, or at least common sense.

There's no need for kids to dress sexy at 11 years of age.

Heck, there's no need for anyone to dress sexy until they're old enough to vote! ;)

[Kitkat22]

Good thing about australia is we have school uniforms. Although in high school some girls do wear minni skirts but other than a few dresses which are short in primary school (due to parental neglect) most children wear shorts under neath.

I wish every school would issue a uniform code for the kids...

[hheath541]

One of the principals at my high school stopped one of the girls in the hall and dragged her into his office. Her skirt was so short you could almost see the bottom of her a$$. He told her that he would never let any daughter of his walking around in a skirt like that, and he wasn't going to let one of his students do so either. He went on to ask her if she REALLY wanted to give every male member of the faculty a woody, knowing that most of them were old enough to be at least her father.

She changed into her sweatpants for gym rather than have him call her parents and explain why she was being sent home. I got the impression they hadn't seen what she was wearing that morning.

[aimee_tt]

The thing I like about uniform is it makes everyone equal. At the school I went to there was the uniform and shoes had to be black so even the poor kids who couldn't afford much didn't stand out and everyone was equal.

I guess the difference is the younger students see the older in uniforms and followed. Not see them in skimpy outfis and though I want to be like her!

[Kitkat22]

The thing i like about uniform is it makes everyone equal. At the school i went to there was the uniform and shoes had to be black so even the poor kids who couldnt afford much didnt stand out and everyone was equal.

I guess the difference is the younger students see the older in uniforms and followed. Not see them in skimpy outfis and though i wanna be like her!

I agree aimee... I remember how bad it was for the kids who didn't have rich parents. I was one who didn't care what they said (still wish I was that way) I remember a girl who wore a different dress every day with shoes to match and she always lorded it over everyone else.

My dad was a hard worker and we had nice clothes but there were seven
Of us kids so we didn't have the kind of clothes this girl had. My mom would iron our clothes at night. One morning this girl came in with a purple dress with pleats and a little jacket to match. She looked at me and said
"you wore that dress on Friday and you have to wear it again today.

My History teacher (God Bless Him) told her..."why don't you stand in the corner and let everyone admire that dress. " Of course I had to pipe up and say; "and while you're at it take the toilet paper out of your bra." Oh well.. I did get a good talking to from the principal and my mom.
Didn't get a spanking either.:D

[aimee_tt]

and while you're at it take the toilet paper out of your bra."

This made me 'lol'.

[philemonphilip]

I agree this is a genuine question, When I was 20, young girls some are aged 11 and 12 has proposed me and have even asked to go for date... which is embarrassing and a real test for anyone... I have reported this to their parents but I am sure not all boys will do that...

[seankirwansean]

Most kids should be able to have relationships but some kids get picked on because of weight issues. Its okay. Fight through it with your power of diet. Keep them away from the cheeseburgers that have affected you and people around you.

[DoulaLC]

Some of the public schools in my area have gone to uniforms. I like the idea for the various reasons already posted.

I do think many of the preteens posting are not actually going out on dates, but are calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend just because they like each other.

I teach second grade this year and have seen it at that level... 8 year olds talking about how they aren't going to be so and so's girlfriend anymore because he likes so and so now.

We had a family Valentine's Day dance and I had a few kids talking about who they were going to the dance with, and whether they had a "date" for the dance. They didn't actually "go" to the dance with them, they saw them there and had a dance with them.

Many kids are growing up too fast... you see it in the media, kids' programs where the kids rule the house, talk back to the parents, sometimes dressing as teens or mini-adults. These kids know the lyrics to songs that would shock you... half the time they don't even understand what they are saying but they sure now the words.

Some parents just don't realize how much their young children are taking in and being exposed to... either at home or at friends' homes. Some parents think it's cute. Thankfully most allow, and encourage, their kids to hold onto their childhood a bit longer.

A few examples of kids being exposed to more than they should: several years ago, also second grade, one little boy was telling another boy about a movie he saw... he couldn't remember the name but was describing a scene and another little boy chimed in that he knew that movie as his sister has it. It was American Pie! I had not seen it myself but had heard enough about it to know that I wouldn't even want my (at the time) 13 year old to see it.

Another little girl shared excitedly how her dad rented Freddy versus Jason for her slumber party... she was turning 9.

Confiscated a note from one of my third graders a few years back as he tried to pass it to a classmate: "You have a hot body"

Ahhh, the stories I could tell... :eek:

[KBC]

Most kids should be able to have relationships but some kids get picked on because of weight issues. Its okay. Fight through it with your power of diet. Keep them away from the cheeseburgers that have affected you and people around you.

HUH?

I don't think you got the jest of this thread at all:(

[KBC]

Kids 'dating',,

When I was 12,I wanted to go to the movies,, WITH MY SISTERS!

When I was 13,I enjoyed LOOKING at girls,but heaven forbid I did what I was thinking about.

When I was 14,I did what I was thinking about, things changed a lot.

Should we usher our children into a way of healthy relationships,without rushing them into the sexual nature of them?YES, absolutely!

The responsible thing to do is to allow our kids access,, TO THE THINGS WE UNDERSTAND,to the things we want them to understand, without having those barriers which MY parents set up, not allowing me to learn from them, I did what I wanted to do, and with a willing partner, continued doing it.

Hey,I don't have the right answer to any of this, every parent/child relationship is unique.Each person's personal boundary is different.I didn't want my daughter pregnant at 21,yet she was, I am proud to be a grandparent,

Did I have say so in her dating scene, yes,I had custody of her at 16,during those times I was with her,we had a 'somewhat' strained relationship,but there was mutual respect,open discussion about how we would handle relationships, mine and hers and hers with others.

Less than 14, I would be ashamed of myself if I allowed my children to do what I did.

I guess I would say that IF communication between the parents and ALL KIDS INVOLVED in an outing, perhaps there can be a compromise reached, a middle ground.After all,we did experiment and learn the how to's somehow... I just wouldn't want it to be that early, that young.(Sex education did actually have an effect on how I dated and proceeded in sexual relations)

OK<<let me have it:p

[slapshot_oi]

The way I see it, the problem isn't the dating, is the general misnomer of what dating is. Just 'cause middle-schoolers s are dating doesn't mean their having sex and whatnot. It's the parent's job to gauge how far the dating has gone and where to draw the line.