[friend4u178]

Sounds like he's not over his Ex so he's keeping you on a lead in case he needs you , like the others said he sounds like a player. And even if you were to get together you would just be each others Rebounds.

[Kitkat22]

Sounds like he's not over his Ex so he's keeping you on a lead in case he needs you , like the others said he sounds like a player. And even if you were to get together you would just be each others Rebounds.

I agree with Friend...

[Twinks2388]

Hey,

So I've been seeing this guy for a while. Yesterday he invited me out with his friends who I've met before. We all had some drinks, were having a good time, went to this person's house and hung out. It was good until we got back to his place. He asked me if anyone said anything to me and I told him that yea his roommate's girlfriend had warned me about him but there was miscommunication and he freaked out on his roommate. Basically it started this huge argument so I left on the phone for about 10 minutes and came back when it was all calm. Then it flared up again and the guy wanted the story straight from me and it was obvious I was choked 'cause I was asked to calm down but he called me a b*t*h so I was upset. I walked out and had to be asked to come back and stay.. the guy and I talked it out but he thinks I made him look like an idiot in front of his friends.. he says it's all good and everything and that his roommate's been acting stupid lately and he's been wanting to move out and everything but.. do you think it's really all good? Would you call back? After all that he told me he loved me.. then said well.. I don't know about love love but I'm really into you and all this. However on the drive back to the city today he was absolutely quiet and held my hand not even 5 minutes before I had to drop him off. Again, would you call me back after all that? He says he cares but.. I'm so nervous!

[ZoeMarie]

after all that he told me he loved me.. then said well.. I dunno about love love but I'm really into you and all this.

Seriously? Wow.

Have you invested a lot of time in this relationship? If not, I say run for the hills. I'm having a hard time seeing what exactly you did wrong, when it was his friend that warned you about him. Maybe it was good you got a warning.

[Homegirl 50]

I have to spread some rep ZoeMarie, but I agree with you.

I would walk away and not look back. That whole situation is a bit too weird for me. Way too much drama and flaring tempers.

[Kitkat22]

I have to spread some rep ZoeMarie, but I agree with you.

I would walk away and not look back. That whole situation is a bit too weird for me. Way too much trauma and flaring tempers.

Sounds like a soap opera and if I were you.. I'd walk away.

[I wish]

Do you really want or need this kind of drama in your life?

Why not find someone else that you can have a happy and healthy relationship with?

[Kitkat22]

Do you really want or need this kind of drama in your life?

Why not find someone else that you can have a happy and healthy relationship with?

Why would you even want a relationship with this guy?

[Twinks2388]

So..

I've been seeing someone for a couple months. I denied hooking up with my ex of 2 years ago after we broke up and hooking up with a professional football player I'm friends with 4 months before I even knew this guy. He found out that I did and he lost his mind, got out of my car, called me and told me to just go home. He tells me he's now unsure if he wants to be with me. I'm keeping this fairly short so.. my opinion is that whatever I did in the past shouldn't be something he should be mad about. He says it's an insecurity issue because of the professional football player and the fact I lied. I didn't lie about anything in this current relationship or even since I met him only about the past part of my life why? Because I didn't want to look promiscuous.. he has major trust issues but honestly.. am I in the wrong for this one? Thank you

[Fr_Chuck]

Completely in the wrong, you lied, that is the issue, and now he has no idea what other relationships or things you lied about.

There is never a "great" reason to lie.

[martinizing2]

It only take one lie to break trust. Even though you are right about what happened in the past should not affect what is happening now. It was not right to lie about it.

You make things look worse when you lie and get caught no matter how innocent they may be.

This may be a hard matter to overcome and it may not happen.

Honesty is the only policy.

[Kitkat22]

He wont'ever trust you fully again.
Lies have a way of getting out of control .

[Cat1864]

You shouldn't have lied to him. It damaged the trust between you.

You should have told him it isn't his business that it was your past and you are free and healthy. That's ALL he needs to know. Digging around in your past to satisfy his need for 'security' is no better than you lying to him (if you didn't want to seem promiscuous, I doubt you volunteered the information).

I am wondering if you really want to be in a relationship with someone who you feel you need to lie about your past to.

[ISneezeFunny]

It's not that you hooked up with these guys, it's that you lied about it. Sure, no one wants to hear about their partner's past sex life, but it's one thing to keep it private, it's another to lie about it. If I had asked my girlfriend (which I don't... mainly because I don't care about her past, but had I done so) about her past sex life, and told me the truth, fine, it would sting me... but I'd find a way to get over it. Had I found out that she had lied to me about it, I'd have more of a reason to start doubting her.

[Kitkat22]

He will never be completely sure of you again. I wouldn't if I were him and that isn't being rude to you. It's just the truth.

[Oddboots]

Lies create distrust. He's in the right about this one.

[talaniman]

He was wrong for putting his nose in your business after only a few months, but you were wrong to lie about it, when you had the option to be honest with him, and tell him its none of his business.

[Kitkat22]

He is wrong and so are you. I don't think it's going to work for either of you.

By the way, has he been honest with you about his past?

[Twinks2388]

He tells me about things but there are times I'll catch him in something and he'll turn it around and use something I've done to try and steer me away from getting an answer or he will say something like I'm not dealing with this I don't need this in my life do you want to be with me or what and over dramatize a simple question.

[Kitkat22]

Both of you need to step away and give each other some space.
Try iy with NC and see what happens.

In all honesty I think he will never be able to let this go. If you stay together it will be there and he will always wonder.