[Jake2008]

I don't think your husband has an addiction to the internet at all, from what you have said. If I've read this right, you've seen him twice in two years, you have a son, and you had immigration problems. He could be doing worse with his waiting time, such as strip clubs, dating other women, drinking, drugs etc. Farmville is a Facebook application, a game that doesn't require any special skill, there is no investment of money (gambling), and to jump to the conclusion that this is what is causing your problems seems unrealistic and immature. How would you possibly know enough about his use of the internet if you aren't around, and blame this breakup on his 'symptom' of addiction? That is a pretty hefty accusation.

That he is afraid you will take everything away from him is probably closer to the problem. Tell me, what do you think he means by that? What arguments, disagreements and impasses have you had over the past two years that have caused the marriage to fail, just when you get the immigration figured out.

Where did you two get married, how did you meet. What country are you in, and what country is he in.

There is a lot more to this problem than Farmville.

[anchalin]

.. I am his wife and I know what exactly he is.. By the way I posted a question here to ask about how to therapy my husband internet Hollic... I do not need to get in to my personal... Do u also play on the Farm ville too?

[Jake2008]

No need to be rude. Surely you don't expect to hear what you want to hear from different people trying to understand your situation. You can take advice or leave it it is up to you, but no need to be so defensive.

You didn't answer any of the questions I asked you. There is no way that this is all one sided, and you are perfectly innocent, nor is it likely that you are qualified to diagnose anyone with an addiction, particularly if you don't even live with them.

So, I am not buying that your story represents both sides of the picture here; there are two (three if you count your son) people involved here, and we have only heard your opinion. You seem to think that if he wasn't 'addicted' to the internet, then everything would be okay, you'd be together, everybody would have their green cards, and the problem would be solved.

You can't cure feelings if they aren't what you want. You cannot make somebody love you, and you cannot make a marriage work if you think that his internet use is the problem.

These are the questions you are deflecting:

That he is afraid you will take everything away from him is probably closer to the problem. Tell me, what do you think he means by that? What arguments, disagreements and impasses have you had over the past two years that have caused the marriage to fail, just when you get the immigration figured out.

Where did you two get married, how did you meet. What country are you in, and what country is he in.

You posted this under 'marriage' so I presume that obviously there is more to this than his internet use.

[anchalin]

No need to be rude. Surely you don't expect to hear what you want to hear from different people trying to understand your situation. You can take advice or leave it it is up to you, but no need to be so defensive.

You didn't answer any of the questions I asked you. There is no way that this is all one sided, and you are perfectly innocent, nor is it likely that you are qualified to diagnose anyone with an addiction, particularly if you don't even live with them.

So, I am not buying that your story represents both sides of the picture here; there are two (three if you count your son) people involved here, and we have only heard your opinion. You seem to think that if he wasn't 'addicted' to the internet, then everything would be okay, you'd be together, everybody would have their green cards, and the problem would be solved.

You can't cure feelings if they aren't what you want. You cannot make somebody love you, and you cannot make a marriage work if you think that his internet use is the problem.

These are the questions you are deflecting:

That he is afraid you will take everything away from him is probably closer to the problem. Tell me, what do you think he means by that? What arguments, disagreements and impasses have you had over the past two years that have caused the marriage to fail, just when you get the immigration figured out.

Where did you two get married, how did you meet. What country are you in, and what country is he in.

You posted this under 'marriage' so I presume that obviously there is more to this than his internet use.

I sincerely hope you have a good and warm marriage between your member family...
Thanks a lot

[Jake2008]

I'm sorry that you are not being upfront here, you have no idea how many people are in this community that can offer you really good advice.

But, it isn't up to us, it is up to you.

For the record, I've been married 33 years, successfully, just one man. I think it is fair to say that I could offer advice on what makes a marriage work.