[Nostradamus_pk]

I think you are attracted to teenagers because you and a younger woman are on the same emotional and experiential level. It makes sense to me that, in effect, you are equals of sorts in that respect.

Speaking from American culture, I would consider you immature and frightened of mature hetero sexuality at your age 28.

I really can't speak for Islamic culture, or other non-Western cultures.

Best wishes to you, :)

Okay same level sexually speaking. ONLY

I am not immature, and that is why I do get hints from older women... and that I do in fact some people I used to work with thought I liked older women and laughed at me.


Please keep the culture+Religion+Country out... I am trying to think independently

I have tried talking to few gals and it always turns out wrong the person is already taken. I just don't go after a girl who is in a relation ship. Wrecking a house is a terrible thing to me.

All these thing add up and that is why I am more attracted to some one younger physically & Mentally.

I keep on saying fresh, no offense intended there; short of expressions.

[smoothy]

Ouch !!

Arranged marriage....I am in USA for now 7 years.

say I go back and end up marrying a girl who is close to my age not that I will have too much to say in the matter lol but lets just assume I do. I know I will get marry once and I will stick in all they to the end. I am a survivor.

I will miss this....but if I do give it a shot it might work it might not work!!

What you said about Change is correct I believe that.

Well, I think you willl find you get a lot less stress from a woman closer to your own age... There are generational differences that WILL result in conflict at some point. Many of these are due to imaturity ( many young people think they know all the answers) and as you get older the more you understand what you really know and can do.

Many guys go through a "Mid-life Crisis" that is much the same in their late 30's to early 40's... they act and do things that they are too old to be doing... sometimes youger women are involved and marriages and families get destroyed over soemthing they will later see for what it was stupid imature stuff.

Don't think you can go back or be young again... you can't and the older you get and try the more obvious it is.

I can't comment on the arrianged marriage thing... I never really understood how people ever agree to that but then I wasn't raised in that culture. I do know several people that were however. And quite honestly I've seen people that would have been better off having their parents pick their spouse than the one they ended up picking for themselves.

[ScottGem]

First of all, if you are constantly running into woman already in a relationship, then you are not going to the right places. There are loads of venues available to meet with woman who are looking for relationships.

And the problem with trying to establish a relationship with someone immature is that they don't last. Someone needs a level of maturity to enter a long term relationship.

[Nostradamus_pk]

First of all, if you are constantly running into woman already in a relationship, then you are not going to the right places. There are loads of venues available to meet with woman who are looking for relationships.

And the problem with trying to establish a relationship with someone immature is that they don't last. Someone needs a level of maturity to enter a long term relationship.

I am willing to take the risk. You are right about going out part.

Thanks for the post

[ScottGem]

I am willing to take the risk. U r right about going out part.

Thanks for the post

But its not only your risk.

P.S. This is not a chat room or text messaging. Please do not you textspeak here.

[Choux]

N, You don't seem to understand that people begin to experiment with their sexuality when they are around 12-13 which is normal. Kissing and holding hands, making relationships.

At age 28, you are way behind socially and sexually, but for some reason, you don't want to think that about yourself, so you will languish in a fantasy world, a safe world. No fear associated with real female interaction.

Time to talk to a professional who can help you understand yourself and your fears. :)

Don't waste time because you are afraid of a blow to your ego.

Best wishes, :)

[Nostradamus_pk]

Y
1. Until you start dating and experience a relationship (not necessarily sexual) with a variety of woman, then what you are after is a fantasy you have built up in YOUR mind. And yes that is where counseling WILL help you.

2. As for the virgin thing, Asking gave a good answer. With the blind leading the blind you have a recipe for disaster. This is not a "good start" but a bad one. You may find it takes a long time to get it good, if ever.

1. Okay I want to date and experience a relationship, but with a virgin and a young girl that is all I want

2. Geez its not a rocket science I am after. Its all natural. Sex; it can't be that hard. It will be pure natural experience. And it will only get better like you said.

Thank you for responding.

[smoothy]

1. Okay I want to date and experience a relationship, but with a virgin and a young girl that is all I want

2. Geez its not a rocket science I am after. Its all natural. Sex; it can't be that hard. It will be pure natural experience. and it will only get better like you said.

Thank you for responding.

YOu are assuming you will find a virgin... that wants only an older man. And you aren't even open to anything else...

Nothing natural or pure about that unless you were a young man as well.

Natural is usually with people your same age group. Look only for an 18-20m year old virgin you are likely to find yourself a 60 year old single man, your whole life wasted looking for one thing you couldn't have. And the older you get the less likely you will ever find that as well.

Quite honestly you stand a better chance of your family finding a young spouse for you in your home country than you are waiting for something that only a small portion of women, much less virgin women want.

What I mean to say if you are waiting for a young virgin that's looking for a much older man to lose her virginity to, then you are likely to be waiting a very long time.

[Nostradamus_pk]

Well, I think you willl find you get a lot less stress from a woman closer to your own age....There are generational differences that WILL result in conflict at some point. Many of these are due to imaturity ( many young people think they know all the answers) and as you get older the more you understand what you really know and can do.

Many guys go through a "Mid-life Crisis" that is much the same in their late 30's to early 40's....they act and do things that they are too old to be doing....sometimes youger women are involved and marriages adn families get destroyed over soemthing they will later see for what it was stupid imature stuff.

Don't think you can go back or be young again....you can't and the older you get and try the more obvious it is.

I can't comment on the arrianged marriage thing....I never really understood how people ever agree to that but then I wasn't raised in that culture. I do know several people that were however. And quite honestly I've seen people that would have been better off having their parents pick their spouse than the one they ended up picking for themself.

Okay I get the part where they are immature and probably we will not get old together.
All that is not written in stone.

Its like I am bore. I am not rich or any thing... actually lucky to have a job in the economy. But, I want some spice and maybe some of my own fantasies to come true. I am guilty of that. But it's the experience I want. To be able to enjoy myself with extremely young silly gal who has not set her foot in the world of Sex just like I have not.

I don't know what's in store for me. The way I am going if I don't get arrange marriage I'll die alone and people won't even know... well perhaps the stink/odor of my body rottening will make them break whole and carry to the grave.

[Synnen]

See... the problem I see here is that you are looking for a girl that will last "for now" until you go back to your homeland and enter an arranged marriage.

Sorry--don't know many virgins in the US that aren't looking for a permanent relationship to give their virginity to.

You are looking for the impossible. Not just improbable, but impossible. If you are not looking for a MARRIAGE partner, then what is the point of dating? Yes, it's fun--but someone is going to get hurt if you go in with less than honorable intentions.

You want a sex only relationship, or one that is "no strings attached" then find a prostitute.

[smoothy]

Okay I get the part where they are immature and probably we will not get old together.
All that is not written in stone.

Its like I am bore. I am not rich or any thing....actually lucky to have a job in the economy. But, i want some spice and maybe some of my own fantasies to come true. I am guilty of that. But its the experience I want. To be able to enjoy myself with extremely young silly gal who has not set her foot in the world of Sex just like I have not.

I dunno whats in store for me. The way I am going if I don't get arrange marriage I'll die alone and people wont even know...well perhaps the stink/odor of my body rottening will make them break whole and carry to the grave.

That is basically not a realistic expectation. In fact that is the LEAST likely thing you will find. Like Synnen has said above. Women just are not saving their virginity to give up for an older guy that's got no intentions of marrying them and might in fact get married to someone else.

Want a youg woman with no strings... there are escorts... they are the furthest thing from virgins, and as long as you are clean and have money they don't expect anything from you but respect. But they can be young and you can have sex.

You can wait, and wait and wait, because you only want what you want and nothing else and find yourself a much, MUCH single older man one day and you see the opportunities you have missed when its too late.

[Nostradamus_pk]

YOu are assuming you will find a virgin...that wants only an older man. And you aren't even open to anything else...

Nothing natural or pure about that unless you were a young man as well.

Natural is usually with people your same age group. Look only for an 18-20m year old virgin you are likely to find yourself a 60 year old single man, your whole life wasted looking for one thing you couldn't have. And the older you get the less likely you will ever find that as well.

Quite honestly you stand a better chance of your family finding a young spouse for you in your home country than you are waiting for something that only a small portion of women, much less virgin women want.

What I mean to say if you are waiting for a young virgin thats looking for a much older man to lose her virginity to, then you are likely to be waiting a very long time.

Oh God!!
I am Beat... may be when I am old I could use my retirement fund to a good use lol
You keep throwing the ugly reality at me.

I am not incapable of achieving this on my own. It can be done. Might have to save the virgin part for after retirement. All the gals I talk to they lost there's around 14 or 15. And that's simply WRONG.

Lol

I though this might have helped but I am actually getting sad.


Thanks for honest responses though

[smoothy]

Oh God !!!
I am Beat.....may be when i am old I could use my retirement fund to a good use lol
you keep throwing the ugly reality at me.

I am not incapable of achieving this on my own. It can be done. Might have to save the virgin part for after retirement. All the gals I talk to they lost there's around 14 or 15. And that's simply WRONG.

lol

I though this might have helped but I am actually getting sad.


Thanks for honest responses though

We are just trying to point out what is an unrealistic expectation... There are plenty of women out there in the world, not all are married... and most of them are not young virgins... limiting yourself to the one thing that's not likely is a bad way to view life.


A healthy approach it looking at all available women equally that are in the right age range... they might not be virgins but if you don't open your eyes you won't see them.

[Choux]

Really, n, talk to a professional. You will feel better and more clear-headed about you situation at age 28. :)

Best wishes,

[ScottGem]

As you have found out for yourself, someone who is still a virgin at age 18 is a rarity. And any that have committed to maintaining that status this long is not likely to be someone looking to give it up to a dating partner.

But you seem to be missing the main point here. That you have widely unrealistic expectation. You have a fantasy. The odds are you are not going to find someone to share this fantasy with you. And the longer you stick to this fantasy, the more you are depriving yourself.

Doesn't the fact that just about EVERYONE responding to your post has told you the same thing tell you something?

[asking]

I agree with the others. If you let go of the idea of "getting" your fantasy virgin and instead starting looking for love with a real person, whose status isn't important, you have NO reason to be sad. You are at a great age to meet someone wonderful.

I think counseling would be a good idea, too. You are stuck on an idea that is holding you back from a major part of your life.

[asking]

As you have found out for yourself, someone who is still a virgin at age 18 is a rarity.

Scott,
Just in the interests of truth and accuracy, 18 year old women who have never had sex are not rare.

I don't know what the current numbers are, but as of 1995, about 50% of 19 year old women had never had sex.

N C H S - 1997 News Release - Teen Sex Down, New Study Shows

The 1995 National Survey of Family Growth, conducted by HHS' National Center for Health Statistics, found that 50 percent of women 15-19 years of age had ever had intercourse, the first decline ever recorded by the periodic survey. The survey previously found that 55 percent of 15-19 year old women had ever had intercourse in 1990, reflecting a steady increase from 53 percent in 1988 and 47 percent in 1982. Earlier surveys found the percentage to be 36 percent in 1975 and 29 percent in 1970.

For 2006, the numbers are:
"53% of girls 15 to 19 and 49% of boys reported that they had had intercourse."
Study Suggests Shift in Teen Sex Practices - Los Angeles Times

One reason that more girls than boys have had intercourse is that older men are more likely to seek them out. All the same, as you can see, 47% of 19 year old women have never had intercourse. That's a lot of virgins.

[Nostradamus_pk]

See....the problem I see here is that you are looking for a girl that will last "for now" until you go back to your homeland and enter an arranged marriage.

Sorry--don't know many virgins in the US that aren't looking for a permanent relationship to give their virginity to.

You are looking for the impossible. Not just improbable, but impossible. If you are not looking for a MARRIAGE partner, then what is the point of dating? Yes, it's fun--but someone is going to get hurt if you go in with less than honorable intentions.

You want a sex only relationship, or one that is "no strings attached" then find a prostitute.

No No NO

I never said that. There are plenty of people in my family who have married gals from other countries.

I don't have bad intentions!!


I respect women... I have met some amazing gals here in USA and who are hot and I made a move as well. It just so happen that they are taken. Lol

Like I said and some other dude as well Dating is the beginning. I never said I have a year to satisfy my fantasy!

I want to say if my fantasy is fulfilled and it clicks I would be honored to spend my whole life with that one girl. And tell me grand kids one day that I fell in love with this amazingly young girl nothing like me and she and I've done all these crazy thing & are going to die together. 1 person for the whole life. I already said If I get married I'll never be able to get out of that...

I can't believe you brought Prostitute in this discussion... Land of the free wasn't quite free for me and now all of a sudden fantasies are also getting sanctions!

Tch Tch Tch


I apologise if I have frustrated you in any way.

[ScottGem]

Scott,
Just in the interests of truth and accuracy, 18 year old women who have never had sex are not rare.

I don't know what the current numbers are, but as of 1995, about 50% of 19 year old women had never had sex.

N C H S - 1997 News Release - Teen Sex Down, New Study Shows


For 2006, the numbers are:
"53% of girls 15 to 19 and 49% of boys reported that they had had intercourse."
Study Suggests Shift in Teen Sex Practices - Los Angeles Times

One reason that more girls than boys have had intercourse is that older men are more likely to seek them out. All the same, as you can see, 47% of 19 year old women have never had intercourse. That's a lot of virgins.

Hmm I wouldn't have put it that high. Last I remember seeing some numbers there were under 40%. I do remember reading that the numbers seem to have bottomed out and Teen sex is back on the rise.

But be that as it may, I still think anyone still a virgin in that age bracket is more than likely to be consciously saving themselves for a life partner.

[Nostradamus_pk]

We are just trying to point out what is an unrealistic expectation..... There are plenty of women out there in the world, not all are married....and most of them are not young virgins....limiting yourself to the one thing thats not likely is a bad way to view life.


A healthy approach it looking at all available women equally that are in the right age range.....they might not be virgins but if you don't open your eyes you won't see them.

U said right range!!

Geez my first post mentioned the girl I really really liked... I would marry her even now with eye shut. She is amazing... guess what she is dating someone almost 20 yr older than her.

There is no right range... I think

Part of my problem is when a girl come up to me and say You look nice today XXXXX, I don't know what to say back. Or some one come might close and smells me and tell me that they like my cologne I tell them its XXX you should buy that for your BF.
Lol

All I am getting from you guys is open your eyes, go to counselor (u r sick), the world is ugly, young gals are not good, I am sick in head bla bla bla