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    BeeBopN's Avatar
    BeeBopN Posts: 12, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #21

    Jan 5, 2009, 04:45 AM

    I understand what you are going through.

    But if, just if you get married with him. I bet you, that you will be living with guilt the rest of your life. You won't be entirely happy. Guilt and thoughts about guilt will kill you and lead you into something worse. Don't be a homewrecker . No one loves a homewrecker.

    Memories are forever, but will be a burden in this case.
    Mom of 2's Avatar
    Mom of 2 Posts: 449, Reputation: 90
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    #22

    Jan 6, 2009, 01:38 AM

    Did you say that you are going through a divorce or ARE you divorced?

    The reason that I ask this is because...

    If you are going through a divorce, you need to get through the divorce before you enter into another relationship. You need to be by yourself for a while so that you can find yourself again, do a lot of introspection. Going from one relationship straight into another relationship is really not a good idea, as this is very codependent behavior.

    And it is NEVER a good idea to be involved with a man who is still married, for the very same reasons that I stated why you need to get through your own divorce. Also, in my way of thinking, once a cheater, always a cheater. I don't care if "the marriage has been over for a long time, blah, blah, blah".

    Weren't you ever taught to clean up your messes before creating another when you were a child? Sometimes I think of relationships as a room. If you don't clean up your messes in a room, then the room soon becomes a disaster, which creates undue stress and anxiety. In relationships, if you don't clean up the "messes" in your life before moving on, then your life will become a bigger mess when you run from one mess to another.
    HistorianChick's Avatar
    HistorianChick Posts: 2,556, Reputation: 825
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    #23

    Jan 6, 2009, 01:11 PM

    One more question for you...

    You're breaking up his marriage. Let's just suspend reality and say that he DOES leave his wife and her kid for you and you two were to get married. What is to stop him from having an affair on you and doing the same thing to you?

    Once a cheater, always a cheater.
    ZoeMarie's Avatar
    ZoeMarie Posts: 2,049, Reputation: 468
    Ultra Member
     
    #24

    Jan 6, 2009, 01:18 PM

    Lmao, tal. We must be posting at the same time
    JBeaucaire's Avatar
    JBeaucaire Posts: 5,426, Reputation: 997
    Software Expert
     
    #25

    Jan 6, 2009, 03:17 PM

    (innocent)
    elizhuie's Avatar
    elizhuie Posts: 13, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #26

    Jan 6, 2009, 04:35 PM

    Wow
    I am actually struggling with the same problem My ex remarried less than a year after our break up. I am single and not dating. He thought I was involved with someone and I wasn't . He called 6 weeks ago to see how our old dog was doing, we have stayed in touch, then told me that he wanted me back but didn't know how to do it. Said his marriage is a mistake. I called back to see where he was with the situation, and he hasn't returned my calls. Nothing I can do. Hurts. All over again. Like he left me again. Stay away and move on.

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