[liz28]

Yalaira, so your saying it's okay for a 38 year old to date a minor? In your post you state it's okay but then say she's a minor. Which one is it? If so, just curious to know what are the limitations that need to set?

[N0help4u]

In some states 17 is legal but still she needs to stand up as a mother rather than asking opinions on how it LOOKS to others like that is ALL she is concerned about.

[ylaira]

You aren't seriously advocating that she allow her 17 yr old daughter to date a 38 yr old???? What the heck are you thinking???

Im not advocating but I'm trying to understand. A year is not too long to wait??

Sorry for messing up spelling But I'm sure I'm clear on "as long as he respects your daughter."

[amy321]

I know I need to be a better mother. I just going to have to talk to her about this and it sounds like I need help too.

[liz28]

Yes, and it's not too late to get that help. Go to counseling and parenting class. What state do you live in?

[ylaira]

You can't help it. Your daughter is growing is exploring. How's the guy (aside from he's 38)? In my opinion as long as there's nothing threatening about his charater, I'll just be there to guide: (eg: set curfew&have one of your child watch them when they are going out) Your daughter will date him whatever you do anyway. What's the good if you will jail the guy?

[ilovejesse01]

This is what you should do keep an eye on her where ever she goes or talk to her because you know he might be a pervert??

[ScottGem]

Im not advocating but im trying to understand.

In my opinion as long as there's nothing threatening about his charater, i'll just be there to guide: What's the good if you will jail the guy?

That's NOT advocating it?? Give me a break.

As to what good putting him in jail would do, it would get a sexual predator off the street.

[ylaira]

Is another 17yr old classmate/neighbor not a predator too? What's the difference?

[N0help4u]

NO a same age is not a predator.
The difference is the law for ONE thing.
Culture is another reason.

[ylaira]

I guess it boils back to parents good nurture and preparation of their kids for the world.. a year from now the daughter will be 18 and our friend here will sure still have feelings that her daughter is dating a guy old enough o date her.

[liz28]

I know if I was 17 and brought home or even told my mother I was dating an 38 year old, my mother would beat my a** while my father is kicking the guy a**. This guy is way too old and old enough to be her dad. It's sicking and you do have men this age that prey on young girls or try to relive their youth.

[ylaira]

Emotions were understood here, we don't know anything about the guy aside from he's 38, now people call him predator etc. Look, even Celine Dion's parents felt bad for for Renee de Angelis when they were just starting ( Renee is 24 yrs older than Celine, and she used to audition to him when when she was just 12 years old & he's 36). But the guy proved he's worthy and way from "predator". If not because of him, we don't have Celine Dion diva now.

[liz28]

Amy you seek help for yourself and keep this guy away from your daughter. You don't know what this guy and your daughter done did because of her feelings towards him and you already stated she slept out many times and didn't know where she was. Ignore anyone who states it's okay and you do what's right. You must feel it's wrong otherwise you would not be asking for people views.

[N0help4u]

There can be exceptions to any rule but she is mom and she should be in control of this rather than concerned about what others think. Notice she never did even say what he was like, what their relationship was like or anything about him or his character even after I asked her so apparently she doesn't know him at all that well and she is not being the mother her daughter needs. IF he was 'all that' she wouldn't be seeking others 'approval'

[ylaira]

Wheres your husband?

[amy321]

Me and my husband are going to get back with each other we are working on it. He is try to help me out also with his kids. He been helpen out along the way with all of this. He has made a big change and is try to help us all out.

[ylaira]

Good. Let your husband handle talking to the 38 yr old guy. Emotions will get in the way if you will do it.

[ylaira]

Its not only right right now because the daughter is still a minor 17
The age gap is just magnified here
Jamie Lynn Spears was just 16, got pregnant by 21 (?)
What's the technical difference?
What if when she turns 18 in a year,
Then it will be opinion by then.

[N0help4u]

What is the technical difference?
Nobody pressed charges against Jamie Lynn Spears boyfriend -possibly because she is Britney Spears sister?
What if when she turns 18?
By law he could still be charged with rape since she WAS a minor at the time.

Spears home state the age of consent is 17.

Also how old WAS she WHEN she got pregnant?