I don't know

Wildcat21 · Jan 16, 2006, 02:47 PM

Yes, yes, yes... I've helped gals and gals do this... many... BUT: You can't break because of cheating, lies - you need to maintain levels of respect and trust. (yes those do break down). There CAN NEVER be any abuse - verbal, mental, physcial.

BUT, you have to change.

It sounds like in your situation you can win back - but you have to SHOW you've changed. Show it - no more jealousy, no more insecure - you are the fun guy, the guy she can count on, the guy who also has a life.

Chery · Jan 16, 2006, 03:45 PM

I was separated from my current boyfriend for two whole years, and refused to even talk to him, although we live in the same building. He came to me several time to try and make amends, but I kept strong. After the two years I accepted a Christmas dinner invitation and we've been together again every since - this is three years now. He did change a bit - not jealous, demeaning, and even helps in the kitchen. He also has started watching comedy shows with me to spend time with me doing something I like. So, yes it is possible. Now, when he upsets me, I tell him right off the bat and we clear it up and don't go to bed angry at each other anymore, but we still do have some great spats - the making up is fun. He used to drink a lot, and he's even stopped that and drinks one weekend a month at a friend's house, and comes home not yelling anymore either.

one_life · Feb 18, 2006, 11:42 PM

Hey everybody how is it going? Its been a long time. Well, I'm still work at the place with my ex, yes she is still my ex. This is the way I figure it, she broke up with me, and she wants to get back with she has to at least make an effort. I'm not going to be the one to initiate anything this time. I'm not going to play any games here. If she wants me back and she is too stuborn to say so, then let it stay that way.

It took me so many months just to get over the hurt. I'm much stronger and I am moving on. If she even initiates anything then it is up to me if I really want to be in a relationship with her at that stage of my life. In the mean while I'll continue to do what I do, and move on with my life.

talaniman · Feb 19, 2006, 06:44 AM

Now that's what I call growing up and correcting your mistakes,a very mature attitude.

Wildcat21 · Feb 19, 2006, 02:02 PM

Good job. And DATE!! Date!! Date!!

Takes a lot of frogs sometimes.

Chery · Feb 22, 2006, 07:43 AM

Originally Posted by one_life

Hey everybody how is it going? Its been a long time. Well, I'm still work at the place with my ex, yes she is still my ex. This is the way I figure it, she broke up with me, and she wants to get back with she has to at least make an effort. I'm not going to be the one to initiate anything this time. I'm not going to play any games here. If she wants me back and she is too stuborn to say so, then let it stay that way.

It took me so many months just to get over the hurt. I'm much stronger and I am moving on. If she even initiates anything then it is up to me if I really want to be in a relationship with her at that stage of my life. In the mean while I'll continue to do what I do, and move on with my life.

SUPER PROUD OF YOU, and do what Wildcat suggests - don't stay at home. Glad we were able to be here for you, and will continue to be.

Love, Chery

one_life · Feb 25, 2006, 10:50 PM

Hi everyone. Well I still stand by what I said in my last post. I think she is trying to make me jealous now. I used to give her rides home after work. In the last few days, she is being picked up by someone else. I think that is her attempt to make me feel jealous. I instead as usually acted indifferent to that.

Wildcat21 · Feb 26, 2006, 12:44 PM

Jjkljkljkljkl

Wildcat21 · Feb 26, 2006, 12:45 PM

No, I think that's her attempt that she's moved on. You need to do the same. Unfortunately, you had done too much danage. Again, leave her alone. Only be cordial with her for now - no seriosu conversatiosn - don't return the e-mail. Don't answer her calls... quit giving her rides. You've been friended. Still playing the 'nice guy'.

Chery · Feb 27, 2006, 08:15 AM

I'm not going to be the one to initiate anything this time. I'm not going to play any games here. If she wants me back and she is too stuborn to say so, then let it stay that way.

It took me so many months just to get over the hurt. I'm much stronger and I am moving on. If she even initiates anything then it is up to me if I really want to be in a relationship with her at that stage of my life. In the mean while I'll continue to do what I do, and move on with my life.

Read your own words, listen to us and stop thinking about her. You've done well in getting over it - now get off your duff and start meeting new people, and wash this (******) out of your head, or you will be a basket case!

I know it's easy giving others advice, and hard to take it when you're involved, but for goodness sake - wake up and smell the coffee now!

If I could, I'd reach through the monitor and spank you!