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Homegirl 50 · Sep 27, 2007, 07:10 PM

Originally Posted by bummedout4

what do you mean? just tell her everything i feel and to just tell me whether its over or not? she knows how i feel and has said we arent together but she keeps putting a spin on it like she is confused and she needs time. do you think she knows deep inside if she wants me back or will want me back and is not saying anything/?

See you know what the deal is, now you need to give her space, and while you're doing it, go on with your life too. I think she may be confusd, but I think deep inside she knows you guys are done.

bummedout4 · Sep 27, 2007, 07:12 PM

Well I hope she is just confused but I guess I have to go on as if we are done for now. I guess that the only way I can start to feel better about everything and myself. Thanks

Homegirl 50 · Sep 27, 2007, 07:24 PM

You're welcome. I really do wish you the best. You will get past this.

star3114 · Sep 27, 2007, 07:34 PM

I know it sucks right now, but it WILL get better. Then you will meet someone terrific and understand that this all happened for a reason. Fate has a way of working itself out in mysterious ways.

bummedout4 · Sep 27, 2007, 07:45 PM

I hope so, I also still hold out hope that she is the one for me because I really do feel that in my heart. I know now though I can't make her feel what I feel, if we are to be together again it will come naturally. If not, I know someone is out there for me, it just seems so far away right now.

star3114 · Sep 27, 2007, 07:59 PM

Just take each day at a time. Reward yourself for getting through the day... rent a favorite movie, take a bubble bath, paint your nails... uh wait, those are chick things :O)

Okay, so scratch yourself and grunt loudly during your fav sporting event. j/k

Do something that you really feel at peace doing. I garden. Helping something else grow makes me feel that I have purpose. Find your own passion, or borrow mine if needed. :O)

What do you like to do in your free time... before you met her... or what have you always wanted to do (not a retorical question... please answer)

bummedout4 · Sep 27, 2007, 08:08 PM

Originally Posted by star3114

Just take each day at a time. Reward yourself for getting through the day...rent a favorite movie, take a bubble bath, paint your nails ....uh wait, those are chick things :O)

Okay, so scratch yourself and grunt loudly during your fav sporting event. j/k

Do something that you really feel at peace doing. I garden. Helping something else grow makes me feel that I have purpose. Find your own passion, or borrow mine if needed. :O)

What do you like to do in your free time...before you met her....or what have you always wanted to do (not a retorical question...please answer)

Well you know its hard to even think back to my life before her. It was just a typical first year of college when we met and I was just hanging out with friends back when everyone was still down here. Since then its been her and me with occasional friends here and there. So I guess I like to play golf, video games, car stuff. So I mean I could do all these things with her, I guess now I just have more time to do them. I guess after some time I will figure some other things that I can do. I just hope I do these things and get my mind right and then see where we stand in the near future. But I don't know where she will be, although we may still be in touch so I don't know how I will feel when I talk to her, when she calls me.

star3114 · Sep 27, 2007, 08:20 PM

Okay... so this weekend (weather permitting) plan a golf outing with the guys. It will give you something to look forward to. A baby step would be to take a cool car for a test drive. Get you out of the house and into some fresh air. Test drive something with lots of ponies under the hood. That will bring out the spunk in you.

bummedout4 · Sep 27, 2007, 08:22 PM

Originally Posted by star3114

Okay...so this weekend (weather permitting) plan a golf outing with the guys. It will give you something to look foward to. A baby step would be to take a cool car for a test drive. Get you out of the house and into some fresh air. Test drive something with lots of ponies under the hood. That will bring out the spunk in ya.

Thanks for all your help and support, I really appreciate it. Don't think I would be able to even think right now if it wasn't for you and others on here. This is one of the best sites I have ever found. I just wish the circumstances were different.

star3114 · Sep 27, 2007, 08:38 PM

So what kind of car are you going to take for a test drive? Huh... huh??

bummedout4 · Sep 28, 2007, 05:50 AM

Originally Posted by star3114

So what kind of car are you gonna take for a test drive? huh...huh????

Haha I don't know. I will see what's out there. Anyway, this morning I didn't call her again. We haven't had contact since she texted me yesterday morning. I pretty much doubt she will be calling me today since she works till 6 then probably will be busy tonight going out or whatever. So I am fighting the urge to call her or text her, its hard but I am trying. I mean I do hope she calls me eventually this weekend for some reason, but I know it probably won't do anything to make me feel better. I do have the urge to just ask her if space is what she really wants or if she just wants to be with someone else, because I know she is hangin out with that guy and those people from work and it bothers me. I sort of look forward to the week because at least I know she's not out late doing whatever with whoever. I know its messed up to think like that and not good for me but that's where I am at the moment. Maybe after this weekend I will feel a little better, but I don't know.

bummedout4 · Sep 28, 2007, 06:53 AM

Should I even text her to say "have a good day at work"? I mean do you think that she will take me not contacting her as me saying that I am OK with everything and don't want to hear from her? I don't want her to get the idea that I don't want anything to do with her anymore and therefore reinforce her decision. But I know that probably isn't the case, just feels like it sometimes.

farfrmnormal · Sep 28, 2007, 07:06 AM

You're driving yourself nuts - go out and do something. Get away from the computer - for like three days straight you have been on here. Write in a journal - something... staying inside alone is going to send you to the loonie bin!

bummedout4 · Sep 28, 2007, 07:10 AM

Originally Posted by farfrmnormal

You're driving yourself nuts - go out and do something. Get away from the computer - for like three days straight you have been on here. Write in a journal - something... staying inside alone is going to send you to the loonie bin!

Well I am at work most of the time I am on here. Its hard to concentrate on work when I have all these emotions and thoughts in my head. So I mean I am not choosing to stay inside willingly, coming on here helps me because I get what I am feeling out and read what other people have to say, it keeps me stronger than I would be all by myself.

farfrmnormal · Sep 28, 2007, 07:11 AM

Is your work getting done?

bummedout4 · Sep 28, 2007, 07:19 AM

Yeah I get my work done, I really don't do much as of now, its my first real job out of college and really just a job to gain experience on my resume. Nothing really hard or exciting. I have just been in a funk ever since this whole situation started, I am trying to act normal around people but I just feel depressed and its not so fun. I like coming on here to read everyone's comments and stories and advice. It makes me feel better sometimes that there is hope that things will work and yet give me the reality that they may not.

farfrmnormal · Sep 28, 2007, 07:22 AM

Do you use any IM clients at your work?

bummedout4 · Sep 28, 2007, 07:23 AM

Originally Posted by farfrmnormal

Do you use any IM clients at your work?

No, I think I have msn messenger installed on here but that's about it.

farfrmnormal · Sep 28, 2007, 07:27 AM

I ask because maybe there are people on your messenger list that can help you talk things through.

bummedout4 · Sep 28, 2007, 07:36 AM

Originally Posted by farfrmnormal

I ask because maybe there are people on your messenger list that can help you talk things through.

I wish, but not really. I mean I am able to function like a normal person and appear to be fine but inside is where I really hurt. I just want things back how they were, and my heart keeps saying to try and fight for it. But my head is saying that's not the right way to approach it, its just a battle between the two. Sometimes I feel like I am going to cave in and call her and then I will think for a minute. It's a hard battle to fight with yourself, something new for me and I wasn't ready for it. I keep thinking this is like the other times we have fought or she has been upset or something but it definitely isn't. I guess the bottom line is I Wish there was something I could do, I don't like when a situation is taken out of my hands completely.