[beth911]

Well, he said when I talked to him last (like a few days or so ago) That he doesn't want anything to do with me and that I couldn't do anything to get him to come back. And I tried and tried but still nothing... But he never gave me a good reason. But how do I know for sure that he would come to me? When he was doing all that, was it just more games?

[beth911]

He finally got rid of every e-mail I sent him in his e-mail. Is that bad? He deleted them all.

[beth911]

I can feel the pain now, and the memories... and it hurts. Idk what to do.. I want him now before I quit caring. If I quit caring I will still want him though

[Clough]

Why do you keep up hopes for someone who obviously doesn't care about you?

Please answer. Thank you!

[beth911]

I talked to him today. He called because someone kept prank calling him and he thought it was me. Luckily they did it when I was talking to him too so he knew it wasn't. Then he thought it was one of my friends but it wasn't. He thought I was telling someone to do it... Anyway, we talked for about 15 minutes and he pretty much just said that he doesn't like the way I am and that he doesn't think I would change. Then he seems to think its okay for him to talk to other girls but it's wrong for me to talk to other guys. First he said that's how it should be and that's how his whole family is.. The wives don't work and do they do what their husband tells them... Then he said that he can talk to other people because he doesn't tell everyone about us and I can't keep my mouth closed so that makes me stupid and I can't talk to people. After a while he hung up... either he had to because of his parents. Or he was mad but he was like in the middle of talking... he just said "if you don't" and then he hung up. I tried telling him I would change.. I wanted to tell him he needs to change to though. But I didn't want to ask for too much at the time. I'm trying to slowly work my way to that. He called a little before that too and when we got off the phone I e-mailed him and told him that if he's trying to get me back, it's not going to work because I don't want to be hurt anymore and treated like that... He called saying that he read it and it made him laugh. Then he said something like "if you wanted to be with me then why did you send an e-mail saying you didnt?'' and he said things like "you were doing so fine though. And I'm happy. Isn't that what you want is for me to be happy?"

[kmt1986]

Girl he has you wrapped around his finger & he knows it. Tell him to get lost & no answering his calls & no calling him. NO MATTER WHAT. What I told you will not work if you still talk to him even in the slightest bit. Nooooo matter what. Us girls will think up any dumb excuse to call or email the guy we are into & it just pushes them further away. You have your own life now.. why would you change for him. Efffff that. He doesn't want that he is just trying to see how far he could take it. Put your foot down now before it gets too late. Just listen to me on this one. Don't talk to him no matter what. Don't tell him what you're up to. Don't tell his best friend or your best friend what you're up to. Ignore him for a week. THEN AFTER A WEEK... only in school... when HE comes near you or HE tries to talk to u.. which he will (NOT BEFORE A WEEK) talk to him. Be sweet as pie but DO NOT SUCK UP TO HIM. TALK TO HIM IN A NICE TONE. IF he brings up the relationship YOU change the subject ASAP. Now you have your own life & you really aren't concerned with what he wants. THAT will make him wonder. THAT will make him want to HUNT you. You are being strug along right now because you are LETTING him. TAKE CONTROL before you lose all potental for control.

[beth911]

Do you think he wants me though? How do I know he really doesn't?

[Wondergirl]

Do it kmt's way -- one week, that's all that you have to ignore him. Meanwhile you can practice being sweet without looking like you're interested.

I really think kmt is onto something. I know men like the chase and HATE to be ignored. Take control, beth.

[beth911]

Thanks, everyone!

[beth911]

Is it considered cheating to talk to other guys online?

[Wondergirl]

Cheating how? You're not going steady or engaged or married.

[beth911]

I don't know. I got bored and was talking to people though but people online always talk like that. But I wasn't exactly. But the person keeps saying they like me and everything. But I enjoy talking to them and wish J was more like this guy... but I only talk to him because I'm bored... Not like that.

[Wondergirl]

Just be careful talking online. Don't give out personal information. (I don't think you would since you were leery even of adorable me.)

I've talked to people who end up living right down the road, within ten miles of my house. Eeeeeek! I'm met some delightful persons online, some of whom have become good friends. I've met only one in person.

As far as your talking to guys online, this will help you become more outgoing and interesting. It also will kill time if you are sticking to The Plan. Just be careful!

[beth911]

Its just I want to talk to them like as friends... and they don't

[Wondergirl]

Where are you finding online conversations? Aren't there friend sites, buddy sites, etc. without all the cybering mess?

[beth911]

Myyearbook.
But theirs just something about this guy where I feel sorry for him. He looks like he's going to kill himself sometime. He said he's been through a lot but didn't want to talk about it.

[Wondergirl]

You can't rescue everyone, beth. And who knows if his story is true.

[beth911]

Yeah I know. And about J... I kind of already got him talking to me. But he keeps e-mailing me until like 5 or 6 am. When we get back to school how am I supposed to ignore him?
Or what should I do?I need to keep him around now.. and get him to show he cares.

[beth911]

J called today and long story but I'm done I can't do it anymore. He may have made this all up... he said he was high, he said he told the school things aboyt me that I didn't want them to know. He kept calling me names and talking abour going to strip clubs and stuff.. even if he wants back I won't let him unless he actually desides to CARE. Because I'm positive he doesn't or he wouldn't hurt me... sorry if this don't make sense... I'm tired and I only got 3 hrs of sleep the past couple nights.

[Clough]

Again, I ask.

Why do you keep up hopes for someone who obviously doesn't care about you?

Please answer. Thank you!