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    crushedovernover's Avatar
    crushedovernover Posts: 260, Reputation: 19
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    #1

    Feb 9, 2008, 10:42 AM
    Well its been awhile.
    Well its been awhile, but my ex is getting married to the man she left me for in 2 weeks. She has known him for 6 months. She cheated on me with this man. She has only seen him 2 times a month since aug. We have a child and I'm fighitng to keep my son here but I just seem to loose at every turn. He lives in Florida she lives in canada. First off how do people get married at 6 months, how is this rebound still going. Yes I am jealous but to get married after 6months is ridiculous. And to try and take my son.. What do I do...
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Feb 9, 2008, 11:37 AM
    You have already done what is right, fight for the custody of your son. The rest is emotional fallout. That's to simple I know. It's the truth though, and yeah, despite all you to have been through, we all get you still care for her a bit. If not as much as before, but you still are a little concerned for her welfare, after all she is still the mother of your child. I understand.
    crushedovernover's Avatar
    crushedovernover Posts: 260, Reputation: 19
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    #3

    Feb 9, 2008, 11:39 AM
    Im fighting for custody, but it just seems I lose at every corner. It is troublesom to me that she just wants me out of her life completely and wants to take my son to go and be with this man. I don't want to lose my son, he is my everything and I don't know what to do.
    crushedovernover's Avatar
    crushedovernover Posts: 260, Reputation: 19
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    #4

    Feb 9, 2008, 11:40 AM
    Who gets married after 6 months tali, what kind of person says to me Ask me to marry you then a week later she is with this man, I just don't get it.
    BMI's Avatar
    BMI Posts: 892, Reputation: 270
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    #5

    Feb 9, 2008, 11:44 AM
    Acceptance is a beautiful thing.
    bushg's Avatar
    bushg Posts: 3,433, Reputation: 596
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    #6

    Feb 9, 2008, 11:44 AM
    Crushed she is just looking for someone any one to help her deal with her demons... (whatever they are) and it will not work out with this man. I don't blame you for being upset after all your son will be around him to. How well can she possibly know this man after 6 months.
    If I were in your shoes and could not keep her from moving or I could not get custody of my son, I would look into the possibility of moving closer to them, so that I could be with my child, more than every once in awhile.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #7

    Feb 9, 2008, 12:03 PM
    Ignorance is BLISS!!
    crushedovernover's Avatar
    crushedovernover Posts: 260, Reputation: 19
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    #8

    Feb 9, 2008, 02:55 PM
    I already have thought about moving. But that is basically moving across the country..
    crushedovernover's Avatar
    crushedovernover Posts: 260, Reputation: 19
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    #9

    Feb 11, 2008, 10:42 PM
    When I wrote this I was preety upset. Still from cooling down it still bothers me that she thinks this kind of behaviour is acceptable. I understand she has the right to be happy and I'm happy for her truly, but to keep our son from me just because you want to move on is being selfish. I don't know why she just can't be mature and talk to me like a human being , its not about her and I this is about our son and I don't want her to take him to be with a man who will be gone in a few years.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #10

    Feb 12, 2008, 07:18 AM
    You keep answering your own question. She is going to do as she pleases, and ignoring how you feel, that's why, or some of the reason, your not together. How is the court thing going, besides slow??
    HistorianChick's Avatar
    HistorianChick Posts: 2,556, Reputation: 825
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    #11

    Feb 12, 2008, 07:39 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by crushedovernover
    Who gets married after 6 months tali, what kind of person says to me Ask me to marry you then a week later she is with this man, I just dont get it.
    Someone who needs to be loved and doesn't know who she is without someone there. That's the kind of person who gets married after 6 months.

    I know. An ex of mine texted me after one month of NC (and 3 years in a relationship) that he was engaged. One month!!

    I was crushed... but... then I started to realize that this guy is afraid of what he is. He can't be alone, he's afraid of being alone, and he needs someone there to love him and tell him he's OK.

    Rather than focusing on what/who she is, your ex is now transferring her sights to another guy, another relationship, and ultimately another thing other than the problems in her own heart.

    I don't know your story, nor do I know the background of what brought you to this point. All I know is that you are doing the right thing... you're fighting for your son. You are his father and you have rights. It will be hard because she is marrying and is able to provide a mother/father unit, but don't give up. Fight for that little boy.

    Good luck to you, crushed.

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