[spartan24018]

If she is still contacting you then you need to tell her that you cannot be in contact anymore. The outcome can only be positive. It may make her focus her mind and see what she has lost, it may not, but you will start to heal over time.

Although getting her back should not be your main aim. NC is about you getting yourself back.

Yeah, getting her back WAS my main aim for about 2 months or so, but she made some big mistakes with her (ex boyfriend now) and it made me look at who she really was, instead of looking at her like how I want her to be. But in my circumstance, it doesn't matter if she's in my life or not anymore. I'm starting to heal more day by day

[in a state]

I'm sick of all you.
They're NEVER coming back.
At least not this year.So
Cheer up,it's 2008 pretty soon.
Until then,shut up.
Get moving

[Jiser]

Yawn. Nc is easy.

[MissingHim2Much]

Yawn. Nc is easy.

Letting go and moving on has been extremely hard for me... but you're right, NC is the easy part... I have'nt even been tempted to call him.

[friend4u178]

Yawn. Nc is easy.

NC is definitely the easy part. In fact NC is a luxury for the people who can't have it. So if you do have the chance of NC , TAKE IT!

[vivia12]

Anytime I miss him, I just remind myself that he's not the same person he used to be or the person I thought he was so what's the point in calling him? It will only make things worse....and frankly, he doesn't deserve my time or energy...let them keep guessing forever...they don't know that you're sitting here thinking about them 24 hours a day..the only way they'll know that is if you call them and tell them...you want to NOT call them so they can start to wonder what the heck you're up to.

You are soooright suelle,about thinking about them 24/7 I thought I was the only one who did that,obsessivelyy think about them,but with NC you can think about them but don't act on it and still protect yourself it's a win win situation. I'm on let see two weeks, hmm, maybe almost ttwo weeks because I did sent him a email attachment w/out writing anything a week ago , I guess that's breaking NC:( but I didn't answer his calls, which was once every two week I see, with no messages. Why don't they bother to leave message if they want to talk to you? But really most of our contact is through the phone which is no more. Now Xmas is coming up and I'm trying hard not to email hi merry Xmas, but NC if you're dedicated is the only way for the rejected to be on equal level with the rejecter, not that we never were equal to them but it seems like they have all the power when they did the rejecting,by doing NC, you're saying, fine you don't want me? You can't have me! %$#@@@! Oops,sorry got a little angry there :)

[vivia12]

Yes I too would like to think that at 4 months I will not be thinking about getting her back.Hopefully by that stage I won't want her back.Right now I do want her back,but not at any price.

That's deep, I want him back to but not at any price, words to live by way to go!

[Jiser]

With No Contact because:

1) They are not in your life

2) The reminders are not there

3) It's broke

The thoughts of them will gradually diminish. It has to happen, its pretty obvious. It's hard but its worth it in the end. Also the relationship is over in most cases, so why should there be contact. Keep at it folks.

[talaniman]

I can appreciate your position. It has been my experience here though, that making healthy decisions, is the best way to go, and healing is the best way to be healthy. It is also my experience that limited contact, and even no contact, has brought the exes back, but in every case so far, The dumpee no longer felt the same, and was going to move on, or the dumpee is seeing the ex in a very different way, and no longer wishes to go back. This has been seen over and over, by even the most hardcore determined dumpees who have posted here. I can only put forth the facts, and stress, its better to get your own act together, and then look at the rest of the world, and think, before you make your next move. Its also interesting that those who have moved on, don't hate the ex for dumping them, as they move to better lives, and relationships, and I think that's the best outcome. I point out even in your own case Radan, your story is incomplete as of now, but we look forward to your update, and I honestly hope you get what you want.

[ihatewestseneca]

Should I wish her a Merry Christmas, or wait for her to do it first?

[ihatewestseneca]

Btw 2 days and strong... lol, not really, but after every weak moment when I cry, when I'm done crying I remember that she's the reason I'm crying and why would I want to call her and let her know that she's getting to me. I don't think I deserve to be a plan B to anyone.

[ISneezeFunny]

Way to go west. Way to go.

Roughly... 2 weeks with a hiccup a week ago. Going strong? Eh... still going.

[MissingHim2Much]

It's been 5 months no contact for me now... I think N/C is the easiest part of all this. I suppose when your ex moves in with someone immediately after leaving you it makes N/C that much easier... I mean what would I say anyway... Offer to buy them a house warming gift?

[ISneezeFunny]

Haha true. Funny thing is, my ex and I had a "good breakup". One of those, I LOVE YOU, AND I WANT US TO TALK IN ABOUT A MONTH OR SO...

... those.

So it was hard. Not only did I love this girl, she was GOOD. We broke up... WELL. So I missed her even more. I even remember saying to one of my friends, I WISH SHE CHEATED ON ME OR SOMETHING SO I CAN BE MAD AT HER AND GET OVER HER More quick.

3 days later, from her friends, I find out some dude's been spending the night at her place.

... touche fate. Touché.

[MissingHim2Much]

i even remember saying to one of my friends, I WISH SHE CHEATED ON ME OR SOMETHING SO I CAN BE MAD AT HER AND GET OVER HER QUICKER.

3 days later, from her friends, i find out some dude's been spending the night at her place.

...touche fate. touche.

I don't think even the fact that he moved in with someone else made it easier or more quick to get over him... I should've been mad but for months I made excuses for him... In my mind it was almost like I thought he left for some reasons beyond his control... Like he didn't really mean it... But I do think that the fact he's with someone else definitely made N/C easier.. Reason being, I was scared I'd find out he was happy... I didn't want to hear that.

[ihatewestseneca]

I really really want her back... I know this is probably a weak moment but I want her so bad to realize that she made a mistake. But I swear I'm not going to call her, or even text her a merry christmas. But sometimes I wonder if she won't realize that she made a mistake, and she is stubborn about making the first move... but I guess a phone call isn't really too much to ask for... I know NC is about me, but I just find myself waiting for her to call. Especially now around the holidays when almost all my friends are away.

[ihatewestseneca]

Day 3... so far so good.

[talaniman]

Natural feelings, its only been 3 days, I do suggest you get proactive on your healing though, it will fill the time better than waiting and wondering.

[kuulski]

Well Guys I have been doing great until today. Don't want to beat myself up about it but my ex emailed me after 4 MONTHS! This is how it went down lol. First email was a Hi in the title with no body to the email I email back hello. She emails back just wanted to check on you and the baby and see how you guys are doing. I give her a quick snapshot of what has been going on with my daughter in her new school etc.. Next is so what you been up to? Gave her a quick snapshot of that stuff working out diet etc.. HELP! Lol.
I feel I have been progressing sooo much I really don't want to see it ruined cause she decided to contact me. Me and her did not have nasty falling out or anything just went through allot myself personally allot of death and it strained our relationship so we parted ways. But recently I met somebody she works with by chance on a internet dating site once I realized they worked at the same job, had the same manager, etc.. I cut the girl off I don't have any animoisty torwards my ex I am hurt but not bitter. Recently I had been really struggling with missing her and I do miss her badly but I don't want any recurrence or setbacks. Do I love her ? Yes Do I miss her ? Yes would I try to work it out? Probably but I don't want to walk into a bear trap which is what I feel is happening. I will keep my distance and the emails to a minimum. I WILL NOT call her or email her directly myself if she emails I will respond but I won't be as the other post says a WUSS lol.

[Maggie83]

Im hating xmas, this is my first on my own in six years all I've thought about is texting her even just to say merry xmas... I know I can't but I want to I'm missing her a lot!

Although I've been very busy the last few days, I mean this is the first time I've really sat down since yesterday morning all I want to do I speak to her, there's no real point I know and I know the more I text I lower myself but I just can't help feeling this way is!

Is anyone else feeling the same?