[mpippin]

My son was taken from me after having an illness that kept him in ICU for 2 weeks. It is HUS and it is an occasional effect of EColi. After having a 50/50 chance of living, he was discharged and began having behavioral changes and having seizure-like spells. Took him to 5 other doctors until I found one that ordered a sleep deprived EEG and found it abnormal. Prescribed seizure medication to my then 3 yr old son. Then called DSS and accused my live in fiance' (who is now my husband) of abuse! He did have bruising from his falls due to seizures. My son was taken into state custody and eventually awarded to his father. This was over a year ago. My son is having some issues with rage. He sometimes won't talk to his father and grandparents, whom he lives with, and he goes into rage and talks of his brother and me, he begs to go home with me, and has even began using the bathroom on himself again after being potty trained 2 years. I need to have my son back. I was a stay at home mom for the first 2 years of his life so its no wonder he is so angry. I am only allowed to see him 4 hours a week. I love him so much. There was never any charge on me or my husband for abuse. My husband was never even questioned on the matter. If anyone has any information or links I can go to for information please let me know. I am in the state of Virginia, unfortunately.

Thanks in advance,
Michelle

[serialwife]

Michelle,
I am a social worker in KY not sure about VA but I will give you the best possible KY senario. Did they terminate your parental rights to the child? Contact social services and ask what their procedure is to get copies of the social service records.. I would ask for an open records request... then contact the doctors offices and get copies of all the medical records. You need to also go to the court clerks office and get copies of all orders pertaining to your child. You need to determine if there was a court or a social service finding of neglect. After you have all this information you need to go hire a private attorney and present all this information. The attorney will need to file a custody motion pertaining to your son. Make sure the attorney is aware of the child's issues and presents these issues to the judge. Your attorney should ask the judge to have a custodial study done. A Custody study is when a therapist evaluates each adult individually, the chidl individually, and then evaluates the child with each adult. In addition, a home study should be completed to determine which home is most suitable for your son. If you have questions just ask. I will look at Virginia law tomorrow.

[fredg]

Hi,
Since the court awarded custody to the father, it will be difficult in starting custody proceedings against the father by yourself. There will be much to go through, and you really need the advice of a lawyer in doing this.
I strongly suggest you get a lawyer, one who has handled custody cases. Do NOT get a lawyer with no experience in custody cases! The lawyer can explain your chances of success.
Explain the situation to the lawyer, also asking an estimated cost.
I do sincerely with you the best, and keep up hope.

[mpippin]

My son wasn't necessarily given to his dad by the court, I had to agree to it because I didn't have money for a real lawyer (The court appointed I had was a joke!) and I wanted my son out of state custody. The only "rights" I have to my son is seeing him 4 hours a week. His father has legal and physical custody. During the proceedings, the guardian at litem got all medical records and told me after the case that a doctor he interviewed told him bruising from seizures that was a result of the illness IS possible. I don't have money for a lawyer. I went to one and he wanted $1000.00. There is no possible way I can pay that but I do need my son as much as he needs me. No one was charged with abuse/neglect or even questioned. What it boiled down to was that me and my husband wasn't married at the time and they kept talking of cohabitation! Also my sons dad had filed a petition claiming he feared for our sons safety in January but then signed a mediation agreement in March saying it was OK for my son to be watched by my husband while I worked. How do I find some financial assistance for a lawyer in this God-forsaken state?!