[ninagirlG]

Hi my name is christina giovanazzi and I'm 16 years old I've been going out with my boyfriend for 3 years . The very first week I started dating him he told me he loves me ,
3 monthes later we had sex.
Now he makes me do it all the time , we get in fights about it and sometimes he hits me if I don't . Also everyday all day long he makes fun of me and call me names or pretends to hurt me . Sometimes it gets so bad I start crying really bad in front of everyone
I'm always imbarased to be around him . Also he won't let me hang out with my friends, talk to guyz ,see my family or wear jeans ! Is my boyfriend abusive and what should I do? please help me!

[J_9]

What should you do? Run as fast as you can away from this horrible excuse for a man and never look back.

This is a very dangerous and volitle monster. What you are experiencing now is only the beginning if you continue to stay with him. He is manipulating you, torturing you, and abusing you. In the end it is possible that he could kill you.

If you don't live with your parents, you need to get back home and get a restraining order against this monster immediately before it gets worse.

This is a vicious cycle that sometimes does not have a happy ending.

Please get as far away from him as fast as you can.

[x-mo-x]

yes he is abusive!! i was in an abusive relationship when I was 16 and he did exactly the same things to me as your boyfriend is doing to u!! i was not allowed to go out to town with my friends,cudnt spk 2 boys, certain friends i cudnt speak 2 because he didnt like them, i wasnt allowed to wear yellow or my hair curly, he called me horrible names, pushed me, called my dad a wanker an thretened to kill me and i still stayed with him for a year and a half because i was soo in love. In the end I had 2 move away for a few months 2 get away from him, i went to spain!! I do think the best thing to do is get him out of your life. I look back now and think wat the fuk was i doin and I see him down the pub and jus laugh at him hes sooo pathetic, treating a girl the way he did!!! It might not be easy but ur better off without him! he'l probally beg for u to get back with him if u finish and promise he'l change but they never do!! hope u sort it, u dont deserve to be treated like dirt!!! take care!!! xxx

[grammadidi]

Sweetie, you need hugs not bruises. Surround yourself with supportive, strong people and in a year or so you will be looking back and THANKING this man for making you strong enough to walk out and live a better life.

Oh, and hun... don't post your real name on online bulletin boards. You need to learn how to keep YOU safe!

Hugs, Didi

[scol409]

You are sixteen years old and you have your whole life ahead of you. This guy is a loser and not worth the dirt on your shoes. You have to believe that you are worth more than this. People treat us how we allow them to treat us. If you expect love, respect, kindness, friendship... then you will receive it.
LEAVE this relationship. You can do better than him.

[TheSavage]

Every word you posted points to abuse -- He damands sex? Its YOUR danm body YOUR problem if you get impregnated Or a STD.
MOVE ON
Now here's the hitch [There is always at least 1 ] Your used to being abused and abusers can spot the kind of girl that are the prey they are after -- the weak and insecure.
Before you start dating again you will be needing a backbone-- Always remember that its your damn body/mind and let no one else think otherwise -- Savage

[houston_chick]

There are plenty of fish I the sea for you to find one that treats you nice!!

[emoXpixxie]

These guys are all right. He is an abusive b******. Get rid of him for your own safety. Call the police, he's breaking the law. I hope things work out for you.

[moomin007]

I can only echo what everyone else has said:

GET OUT while you can!

You WILL get through it and be a stronger person for it. It will take time but it will happen. I know. It happened to me.

There is a whole world of beautiful people out there, why settle for the first scumbag who comes along?

You can be a beautiful, independent, strong woman.

Tell someone what is going on (friend/dr/priest), ask for help but don't delay.

The fact that you have asked the question here tells you that you know it is WRONG.

Have courage, be strong, it will be the best thing you've ever done.

Moomin

[JoeCanada76]

First of just a bit of advice about advice boards and websites like this. Never ever ever use your full name. Unless the reason you did is you want somebody else to call the cops and somebody could use your full name. It is not wise or safe to use your full name.

Second, this abusive son of a Bit$# needs a good beating himself and you need to get the cops involved. Charge the sob and make sure he has no way of finding you. Restraining order is a must here.

Third, where are your parents in all of this? Time to get your parents involved if they are in the picture. They need to know what is going on.

Joe

[kristynn]

HE'S VERY ABUSING!

You must seek help immediately! You seem very unhappy and the whole situation you're in is very unhealthy.

What you have to do (although it won't be easy) is that you have to get away from such a person. I guess he has problems w/ himself. He's very controlling and you don't need such a person. I doubt he loves you and I really think he's only using you. He has no respect...

You're very young and you don't deserve this!

[robertsqueen]

YOU NEED TO GET OUT NOW. I was in an abusive relationship when I was in high school. He was my first real boyfriend, and he tried to drown me in the lake. I woke up in a hosptial... You have to get out now, before it gets worse. Also you need to tell your parents what he is doing, and inform your local law enforcement. If you said no to sex and he still had sex with you he raped you... You need to let people know, don't make the same mistake as I did.

[lacuran8626]

OK, this is the deal. Your parents may not know you are having sex so you may feel like you can't go to them. You can and must. I'm a parent--I'd want my child to tell me and would guess your parents would, too. Still feel you can't? Go to your school counselor and ask them to help you tell your parents, or to just help you directly. Having another person there who has a counseling background will make it easier and help keep things from getting overly emotional and harsh.

You are way over your head and out of your element and you and your famliy could all be in danger.

My suggestion is to tell your parents, get an immediate restraining order, and take this very, very seriously. He has done pretty much everything that is a classic sign of escalating abuse. If you can, change schools. Even, if you can, go stay with other relatives to finish high school. Don't tell other friends where you are.

This may sound extreme, but you should not diminish the danger he has put you in and leaving him will likely make him more volatile. You need to know, though, that staying with him will also escalate the situation - he is sick and even if he pleads that he will do better, he can't. It's not in his control. What you describe makes me wonder if he has raped you, and if you have justified it in some way?

You need some counseling. You also need to hear this very,very clearly - this relationship will never, ever, ever be good for you. You are too young and not ready for a sexual relationship, and those feelings you have that you don't want to complywith his demands, is your body telling you that you are not in the right situation. It is what they call the "flight" instinct that tells us to get out of unsafe situations. Listen to it. Act on it.

You may be blaming yourself or feel emabarassed or even may be stating to believe the unkind things he has said about you. Just keep telling yourself you deserve better, and get your family, school and your close friends (nobody who remains friends with him though) around you. You will get through this.