[TrentonQ92]

My name is Josh. I'm 18 years old, and I'm gay. I'm happy being gay and out to everyone, but it wasn't always like that. When I was 16, no one knew I was gay until I met a guy, Kyle. Kyle was 24, and friends with my older brother. Kyle and I started talking over the internet and texting, and I eventually told him I was gay. He helped me come out of the closet and be happy being me. Eventually, Kyle and I started developing feelings for each other. We decided to stop talking until I was 18.

14 months later, on my 18th birthday, Kyle gave me a call. I waited for him for 14 months because I fell completely in love with him. We dated, and it was magical. He was everything I wished for, and more. I was completely and utterly in love with this man. However, he decided to end it six months in because he was having problems. He said he felt smothered by me, and isn't completely comfortable being in a relationship right now. We broke up, and we continued to fight for a few months.

Today, Kyle and I have an excellent relationship. We've moved on from the fighting, and moved on from the relationship. I haven't completely moved on though. Although Kyle is now my best friend, I'm still in love with him. It hurts me when he tells me about this "new guy" he met and likes. It hurts to be close to him because all I want to do is kiss him. It hurts to just be a friend. I want more, but I don't think he does.

I can I get over him? I don't want to stop talking to him. He's such an important part of my life. But I know that I can't go on feeling like this. It'll drive me crazy. How can I move on from the man that I once called my soulmate?

[amicon]

Josh hey. Its tough being friends with an ex. You still have feelings for him and now you hurt. I think you need to put some space between you. Lol.

[emerylynnlove]

Sweetie you can not go from a relationship back to friends over night! You need to put time and space between you, not talk to him everday not run every time he wants you to, when you stop doing those things and start doing for yourself and maybe even go on a couple of dates yourself then you will be able to get over him but you will never forget about him because he is your first love and those stick with you forever

[amicon]

Well said. Good luck josh. It will get better.

[TexasLonghorn]

Stay strong. But being around him all the day does hurt you... you did need a little bit of space.

[Justwantfair]

You absolutely need to walk away from this friendship for a great, if not permanent, deal of time. Your feelings are unresolved and you will not be able to maintain a friendship with Kyle while you still have feelings for him. Break ups are very difficult because most of the time it means losing our partner and our best friend, but it's the only way that we can give our hearts the time and space to heal.

You need to stop contact with Kyle until your heart is mended. That may be months, it may be years, it may be forever. The only true definition of a mended heart is when you can know that he is dating and not feel any emotionally involvement, no pain, no hurt and no jealousy. When you can feel for him the way you feel for any other friend you are closer to maintaining a friendship, but right now you are asking too much of yourself and are only causing yourself pain.

[talaniman]

The others are right, you need time and space to mend, and let the emotional dust settle.