[Diana_LA333]

I met this guy two years and a half ago after acouple of months he had to move so now we are in a distant relationship. After about a year and a half we started fighting because sometimes he would choose his friends over me and he actes like he doesn't care. He just told me he liked hanging out with his boys and that he loved. Then one day after two years we got in a fight bacause he wouldn't call me. Then he said I should take some time and try to look for a different guy or find out if he is what I really want. So I would call him and he would answer or call back but one day he started being different like he wouldn't return my calls and when I confronted him he said he was busy. Does he love me?
Could he be cheating on me?

[JBeaucaire]

I'm not sure you can call what you two have an "actual" relationship, so can you call him wanting to spend time with his local friends and perhaps a local girl "cheating"? I don't know. It seems like a stretch.

Does he love you? How does answering that help? Feelings aren't the issue here, actions are the issue. Geography is the issue. Being realistic is the issue. You guys are losing on all those issues.

And it also sounds like your relationship, nice as it may or may not be, can't really stand the distance. Are you two the kind of people that can only break up in a heated, hateful, angry, arrow-slinging argument? Perhaps you two could be more mature about it and break up because it's not working and you don't want to turn each other into enemies.

You love in the fantasy world of the heart, but you have to live in the real world. Dating requires daily PHYSICAL interaction and commitment. You two can't do that and you know it. Be grownup about it.

[Illusion]

Diana, you need to move on. This is not in your favor, this young man does not know how to come out and say good-bye - and he is wasting your time. He has his friends and has made it clear he will spend time with them. He has already asked you to look for another guy. It is time that you make a decision for yourself - called taking care of yourself - and let this go. He has given you enough information to let you know that you need to move on. He just hasn't come out and said it - but his behavior is sending out signals big time. It is taken you by surprise - you can't believe that he is behaving this way - someone that you were once close to.

I am so sorry for this - the signs are all there and you may not want to admit this because you may be afraid of getting hurt. Let go of this, have a good cry and do not call him again. There are other young men waiting for your friendship and love. Take care.

[Washington1]

Some men are controlling, and what he's doing is the definition of controlling.

He wants to be the player (Note: This doesn't mean he's messing around)! It makes him feel like he has an edge. Not to mention a female he can run to anytime things get rough, or when he needs something you can provide. Do not be that female.

This is what you do (trust me--i've been that guy during my younger days--age 16-20).

Stop calling! Now you are in control. Also, start hanging out with friends, and enjoy being yourself, and the results will manifest.

[ladieedee21]

Chick...
This playya doesn't love you..
What.. he doesn't get back to your phone calls... he bearlyy talks to youu.. and
He tells you to try to FIND SOME OTHER GUY.
What dah hell... thatt is not what you call I love you..
You know I don't know why your wasting your time over this player when you could have fun with your friends and at the same time have someone who is there with you...

[talaniman]

How old are you two?