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nickshehe · May 1, 2008, 05:17 AM

West, these things kind of just happen.. I've only been on NC 31 days.. dumped for a month and 2 weeks about. I've slept with 5 girls since then (most my friends in a relationship would swap places with me and they envy that sort of freedom) - but it meant and means nothing to me.. I hate being single.. You mentioned you wish you had another interest.. I have several really but they're all meaningless, but to be honest it makes me feel better. I know nothing serious will develop with thes girls(I make sure I don't mislead them either).. I talk to one in particular that keeps me busy and keeps my mind off things. I miss my ex the most whenever I'm bored really.. So I just have a GIRL to call.. I know many people suggest a friend or whatever but that doesn't cut it for me.. I just call her.. we flirt here and there.. then its off my mind.
You should talk to as many girls as you can.. it really helps I think.

confusionmax · May 1, 2008, 08:39 AM

Day 4 going strong! I'm still thinking about him, but I don't have the urge to call him or text him. :)

jpm247 · May 1, 2008, 08:51 AM

Originally Posted by ihatewestseneca

Can't sleep tonight... its 4AM... its been about 4 months NC... and im still having these days/nights... shouldn't i be better by now... i know ive made a lot of progress, and im happy with things right now, but i just wish i had another interest... someone else that i could see myself with. Its just so damn unfair... if my ex ends up with this new guy i think im gonna take karma into my own hands, shed a little blood. (im kidding, obviously) but sometimes i want to hear something, anything about they're demise... im pretty sure its gonna happen, but i can't be sure, lol that sounds so selfish... goodness writing this makes me feel better, i less than 3 AMHD... i am so glad i found this site, im so glad for the great advice... i dont know where i would be without it. but at the same time i'm glad my ex is happy, if she is happy... and i think i would like to be her friend one day, but im gonna let it happen naturally... im not gonna call her this summer at all when she comes home, NC is easy, but knowing that she's around doesnt make me feel any better. i also know that she has just about no friends here, what the crap is wrong with me... i know ill feel better tomorrow, and i know that girls will flirt with me tomorrow at work, and i should feel a little prideful about that, but none of them really do it for me... so it has me thinking im too picky, but is it so wrong that i know what i want in a girl and dont really settle for anything less? i guess i still have trouble accepting that she just doesnt want me anymore... and it really boggles the mind, we were so great together, and it sucks to think that the guy she left me for is better... women huh?...

amazing how many people feel like that west, I know I do too sometimes.

I'm picky with my women too. I guess I wasn't looking when I met my ex, then we randomly met and had a great year together, then she bailed on me.

I guess I don't really feel anything toward any other females at the moment, but I guess this isn't a quick fix especially after we invested so much. The more you put in the more you stand to hurt, if the other person isn't putting in the same amount.

next time around I'm going to be strict 50% input from me.

all I can say, is that keep doing NC, and try and fill the large void as best as poss. I know how u feel as I miss the company and the friendship and the relationship I had with my ex. We spent a lot of time together and its hard to let go, and hard to fill the space they left behind.

ill be dammed if this breakup gets the better of me.

don't put too much pressure on yourself to find another, will def happen, might be a while though, just try and be happy for who you are, and also for what you will become.

that thought keeps me going. My ex let the best thing in her life go, but that was her choice, and one day I hope she regrets it, but its what she wanted, and the day before she split with me was saying ' its taken me this long to realise how much I love you and want to be with you'

next day she dumped me! Lol

women huh!

if I didn't laugh id cry.

keep going, your doing well.

kaneda · May 1, 2008, 09:00 AM

Day 4 is going nicely but :/ it hit me today,the thought that every day further into NC creates a greater and greater distance between us.There will be no turing back.

ihatewestseneca · May 1, 2008, 09:09 AM

Originally Posted by jpm247

amazing how many people feel like that west, i know i do too sometimes.

im picky with my women too. i guess i wasn't looking when i met my ex, then we randomly met and had a great year together, then she bailed on me.

i guess i don't really feel anything toward any other females at the moment, but i guess this isn't a quick fix especially after we invested so much. the more you put in the more you stand to hurt, if the other person isn't putting in the same amount.

next time around im going to be strict 50% input from me.

all i can say, is that keep doing NC, and try and fill the large void as best as poss. i know how u feel as i miss the company and the friendship and the relationship i had with my ex. we spent a lot of time together and its hard to let go, and hard to fill the space they left behind.

ill be dammed if this breakup gets the better of me.

don't put to much pressure on yourself to find another, will def happen, might be a while tho, just try and be happy for who you are, and also for what you will become.

that thought keeps me going. my ex let the best thing in her life go, but that was her choice, and one day i hope she regrets it, but its what she wanted, and the day before she split with me was saying ' its taken me this long to realise how much i love you and want to be with you'

next day she dumped me! lol

women huh!

if i didn't laugh id cry.

keep going, your doing well.

Thanks a lot Jpm... this is what I'm talking about when I say I love AMHD... always someone with an answer that will make you feel loads better... I guess I just kind of forget that I'm not the only one going through this... and its funny how that works, I started dating my ex when I had just started to not worry about getting a girlfriend... I used to be that guy who would roll with everything and just go with whatever is happening, then after dating my ex, we planned so much stuff out... and I like that I'm getting back to that carefree guy.

And my ex said something along those lines the day before she broke up with me too... "Westy... i am so in love with you." next day... game over.

Women Ha!

ISneezeFunny · May 1, 2008, 09:22 AM

Day 1: I love you.
Day 2:... I need time.
Day 3 - 20:... I found someone new.

... should be a t-shirt idea.

Sorry to hear you're down westy. Since the weather's clearing up, you need to get outside. Tell someone you'll walk their dog for them and take it to a park. There're women EVERYWHERE.

As for me, I'm currently infatuated with this one girl... I am told that we're dating (by people around us)... but I don't think we're there yet. We just hung out about 3 - 4 times, that's all.

But yeah, I'm never putting 100% her. n.e.v.e.r.

kaneda · May 2, 2008, 01:50 AM

I love that T-shirt idea :)
Anyway so far day 5 is great but last night he made contact :0 and by contact I mean via an IM he sent me a picture.I took my time trying to decide if I should accept it, seemed harmless enough.Turns out it was a picture of his varorite singer (sp vocalist)?! Wait what? He initiated contact to send me a photo of some other woman?Why would he do that?Complete and utter selfishness? I got pissed, logged off and that's that.

ISneezeFunny · May 2, 2008, 01:53 AM

... it wasn't another "woman"... it was a picture of a celebrity?

... did he just simply send you a pic or were you two actually talking before he sent the pic?

Don't let curiosity get the better of you. You know what it did to the cat...

kaneda · May 2, 2008, 04:00 AM

... a dust nap. Well no we weren't talking - he never said anything and I never said anything. Actually he often used to show me pictures of D`arcy and this one was no different.Way to go,push your own interests on someone who's NC-ing you.I'm still pissed :/

Questions2007 · May 2, 2008, 04:43 AM

[QUOTE=ISneezeFunny]Day 1: I love you.
Day 2:... I need time.
Day 3 - 20:... I found someone new.

... should be a t-shirt idea.

Ha ha, very funny. I think more accurate:

Day 1: I do love you
Day 2: I am not sure about us
Day 3-10: I need time but I want to stay friends
Day 10-30: I have met someone else
Day 30-50: I don't think it is fair on my new person if we keep seeing each other followed by begging and pleading
Day 50ish: You start No contact
Day 120-250ish: You realise you don't really care anyway. What made you such a need fool etrc
Day 250ish onwards: I have been thinking about you, can we talk. You say no, not interested.

ISneezeFunny · May 2, 2008, 05:26 AM

Yeah, but I figured it'd have to be an XXL t-shirt to fit all that.

kaneda, I know what you mean. Give it some time, and just try to stay busy. I'm on day... good lord... 140 ish? I lost count. My ex has stopped calling. HUZZAH!

kaneda · May 2, 2008, 05:47 AM

ISneezeFunny huzzah indeed clap clap But why do you still keep count? You seem pretty moved on :confused:
BTW I'm putting serious thought into making that into a t-shirt,it would make nice PJs AND remind me not to give in :)

ISneezeFunny · May 2, 2008, 05:50 AM

Yeah, I'm actually moved on quite a bit... currently infatuated with HBIASMS-girl... (hot but independent and sending mixed signals). That number's just off the top of my head... we broke up... 4... 5 months ago? Something like that.

t-shirt idea. I've bee pushing the whole, "I need space" one... for quite some time.

kaneda · May 2, 2008, 05:53 AM

Sounds more like stringyoualong playgirl type,but you know better

ISneezeFunny · May 2, 2008, 05:54 AM

Very true. I couldn't agree more... but she's hot enough (not to mention... extremely nice/sweet enough) that I'll allow it.. . that's a dangerous mix. Smart, beautiful, AND extremely nice.

As for now, it's finals week, so I have better things to do than to fawn over her. Last final today. Last final today! Best wishes kaneda. I'm going to go a-fib for the next couple of hours.

kaneda · May 2, 2008, 05:57 AM

Ah yes,ye olde hot factor
Ex showed up in IM hasn't said a word,I guess being rejected sucks huh

ISneezeFunny · May 2, 2008, 05:58 AM

I have the same problem... cept HBIASMS-girl's online and she hasn't said a word.. . yes being rejected sucks. Sad.

losingit77 · May 2, 2008, 06:30 AM

Dreaded Day 13 of NC. This is the day I made it to last time before breaking it. No chance of that happening this time! I at least have to double it now (little goals ; ))

Now, the dreams have kicked in. Every night for the past 3 days I've dreamt about him. Oh well, I guess they'll go away after awhile.

bigbird213 · May 2, 2008, 06:47 AM

I'm on Day 13 as well. First time I've actually stopped and counted it out.

For the first week or so I was feeling great. The last two days have been a little tough on me but in less than a week I'm home from school for the summer. Should be tons more to do then.

ISneezeFunny · May 2, 2008, 06:48 AM

I think that's a small blessing I have... I rarely dream (last dream I had was... I think 6 - 7 years ago), but when I DO dream, it's WEIRDDDD (i.e. - last dream I had... in high school, I think Ted Turner was choking in a restaurant and I did the Heimlich, didn't work, so I had to do an emergency trach. Weird...