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    MoeyLuv's Avatar
    MoeyLuv Posts: 15, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Apr 14, 2008, 02:37 PM
    I've lost my bestfriend/lover.
    My bestfriend and I made the horrible mistake of taking our relationship to another level. Just a little background... we were bestfriends for close to 10 years, but when i went to college we sort of lost touch but when i moved back we reconnected... but not only as bestfriends. everything was good about the "more than friends relationship" except for the fact that I wanted to be his girlfriend but he always said that he didnt want to ruin our friendship with titles,and also if things never worked out we could hopefully still be friends. or he would say we both know what it is so why do we have to put titles on it. now this guy like most guys isnt willing to share his feelings. But with him he did when i suggested that we not be together anymore or if I even hinted to us just going back to being friends.. then he would beg me to not do that and confess his love for me... so now I started to see the only time I get not only the attention but also to get to know how he feels about me I have to threaten to end things btwn us... ok so maybe I did get a little carried away.... so one night about 3 months ago I got really upset with him and I ended it with him... and he said to me if you do it this time im telling you thats it im not going to beg you or nothing... of course I thought he was bluffing ... but of course this was the time he was serious.... ok 2 weeks go by and i dont hear from him or anything then it really starts to set in that its really over btwn us...
    I try to call him and talk to him but he doesnt answer, he just recently started answering my text messages... I really just want my bestfriend back.. nothing more.... somebody please give some advice to get my bestfriend back!!!!
    progunr's Avatar
    progunr Posts: 1,971, Reputation: 288
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    #2

    Apr 14, 2008, 02:47 PM
    It may not be possible.

    Sorry to have to tell you that, but, having been more than just friends now, he may not be able to tolerate being "just friends again". I would have a difficult time with that situation.

    There is an old 70's song by Lobo. It was called "don't expect me to be your friend". Ever heard it?

    This is the risk we take, when we do decide to take things to the next level.

    Just try to be strong, 10 years from now, no matter how this turns out, it will seem such an insignificant issue to have suffered so much, from when your hind sight will surely be 20/20 as it always seems to be.

    Good Luck to you!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #3

    Apr 15, 2008, 05:29 PM
    You must understand he was tired of the games you played as a g/f, now he is po'd to the max. Yep you messed up a relationship, and a friendship. Leave him alone.

    Did you learn anything?
    lmnotok's Avatar
    lmnotok Posts: 217, Reputation: 37
    Full Member
     
    #4

    Apr 15, 2008, 06:33 PM
    10 years of friendship is not a short time. So I believe that he'll become your friend again. But not as close. So right now, just let him be, leave him alone. When the dust is settled, sky is clear again. Stay calm, and everything will be just fine.

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