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    GL LC's Avatar
    GL LC Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Mar 24, 2008, 06:34 AM
    Morals: Drug use
    I have been in a relationship for 3 years with this girl. Trust is a huge moral of mine and I believe there may be a problem. I am a 18 year old male and I have morlas that are very strong. My biggest one is being drug free. I absolutely hate drugs and I do not associate with people that use them. I attempt to distance myself from users. Well last weekend my girlfriend and I were talking, and she told me she had tried marijuana the weekend before. My heart dropped, and I have never felt so betrayed in my life. She has known since day one, that this is one my most important morals. I feel I can no longer trust her. She is the closest person to me, and I love her dearly, but it has been bothering me for 3 days. I have trouble sleeping and it gives me headaches. Should I stay with her? Should I explain to her that I can no longer be with her? What should I do? I understand that to most people it is probably not a big deal, but this betrayal has me in such pain, its undescribable. How could she go and do this, knowing the way I feel about it? Why would she feel the need to try it. She has assured me she just wanted to try it, and she will never do it again. Should I trust her?

    Please give me some honest feedback!
    excon's Avatar
    excon Posts: 21,482, Reputation: 2992
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    #2

    Mar 24, 2008, 06:44 AM
    Hello GL:

    I think you need to lighten up. It's fine for YOU to set the bar for yourself, but if you set it too high for your friends, you won't have any.

    excon
    Yours To Forget's Avatar
    Yours To Forget Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Apr 14, 2008, 09:45 AM
    The fact that she came clean about it to you, shows you can trust her. And since she's never done it before, clearly she supports your decisions and doesn't want to disappoint you, but you can't blame a teenager for being curious or experimenting. Expecting her to conform to all of your standards and breaking up with her because she momentarily fell below your line of perfection is a tad harsh.
    progunr's Avatar
    progunr Posts: 1,971, Reputation: 288
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    #4

    Apr 14, 2008, 09:59 AM
    You need to lighten up man, it's not like she swallowed a crack pipe or something!

    I agree with excon, such a high level of expectations of those you associate with will certainly limit your potential handful of friends.

    Take a deep breath, everything will be OK.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #5

    Apr 14, 2008, 12:05 PM
    Expecting others to live by your ideas of perfection, is not a great idea at all. Your g/f told you the truth straight up, so trust is not a factor, your high expectations are. You must be perfect, and have no faults, or you would have forgiven her.
    Devildog0311's Avatar
    Devildog0311 Posts: 14, Reputation: 2
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    #6

    Apr 14, 2008, 12:13 PM
    Sounds experimental to me as well. If you love her you'll forgive her. If it happens again then raise concerns about your relationship.

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