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    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
    Uber Member
     
    #21

    Apr 13, 2008, 04:39 PM
    Then it seems like you are playing volley ball with him
    You want him back when he wants time but when he is ready to discuss it you want time.
    flatron's Avatar
    flatron Posts: 12, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #22

    Apr 13, 2008, 04:45 PM
    Yeah kind of. First he tried really hard to be friends than I ed up and now I am trying really hard to be friends.
    The difference if when I have problems I like to go straight to source and try to deal with it.
    Him... want the opposite. I am coming terms with it N0help4u. That he does need this time.
    Its ironic things which makes me happier makes him sadder and vice versa.
    I gave him time 1 and half months. I think its time for both us to face reality and not run from it. Or is this just pure self-fishiness. Isn't not contacting just makes us even more apart?
    flatron's Avatar
    flatron Posts: 12, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #23

    Apr 14, 2008, 03:52 AM
    Hey guys the problems been resolved. We had a long chat.
    And he does want to be friends. And he made clear how me contacting him isn't helping.
    So I am just going to stop contacting him and get over him.
    I am pretty relieved.
    COOKIE MONSTER's Avatar
    COOKIE MONSTER Posts: 589, Reputation: 56
    Senior Member
     
    #24

    Apr 14, 2008, 12:47 PM
    Good I'm glad to hear your going to start no contact and get over him it's the best thing you can do
    flatron's Avatar
    flatron Posts: 12, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #25

    May 3, 2008, 10:25 PM
    It nearly been a month and I did contact him. Once on msn but sure he have me blocked. And once this morning. They were not emotional or clingy so I am letting myself of the hook for them. I haven't been doing to well...
    This moving on business is hard.
    I though as time passing will help me realize he isn't coming back. But I am so convinced he will... I just keep lingering. I should be moving on... and if he does come back than start thinking of him again. Grrrr what's wrong with me!!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #26

    May 4, 2008, 05:33 AM
    grrrr what's wrong with me!!
    Your broken hearted and have a hole in your soul, and it takes time to heal. Other than that... your fine. Be patient with yourself as it will get better.
    Sad Soul's Avatar
    Sad Soul Posts: 177, Reputation: 40
    Junior Member
     
    #27

    May 4, 2008, 06:27 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by flatron
    it nearly been a month and i did contact him. once on msn but sure he have me blocked. and once this morning. they were not emotional or clingy so i am letting myself of the hook for them. i haven't been doing to well...
    this movin on business is hard.
    i though as time passing will help me realize he isn't coming back. But i am so convinced he will... i just keep lingering. i should be moving on... and if he does come back than start thinking of him again. grrrr whats wrong with me!!!

    You're convinced he's coming back and you will hold on to any signs that may seem like he will, because after a break up, your body and soul need those delusions for survival. The shock of somewhat losing a best friend can be detrimental on our mental health, so we tend to help our healing process by believing that our ex will come back (at least we believe this for a little while).

    You're right. Moving on is damn hard. This is why you have to take your medicine, even if it doesn't taste good. You can't skip out on it either, because medication won't work otherwise. That is, you have to maintain "no contact" (your medicine) even if you don't enjoy it... you'll see that it'll work wonders with time.

    Are there things you have to do? Books? Money? Looks (health)? Take this time you have in being single and focus on building the best "you" that you can. This breakup could be a blessing in many ways, if it means you actually have time to produce a stronger self. And in the process of improving (becoming happier with yourself and changing your perception on this whole ordeal), you'll be attracting MANY good people into your life. That's because everyone wants to be around happy, healthy and successful people. Trust me. You'll be fine, if you choose to be. Make the best decisions for "you" starting now.
    flatron's Avatar
    flatron Posts: 12, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #28

    May 4, 2008, 06:30 AM
    :) taking day by day.
    He will come back.
    But what kind of guy want to be with clingy person.
    I have to move on... if I want any chance with this guy :P
    Jiser's Avatar
    Jiser Posts: 1,266, Reputation: 281
    Ultra Member
     
    #29

    May 4, 2008, 07:22 AM
    No contact, work on yourself. Give it time.
    flatron's Avatar
    flatron Posts: 12, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #30

    May 4, 2008, 07:35 AM
    Haha thanks guys.
    Just reading my previous posts I can see I have changed.
    I am a lot stronger now.
    Even though... I still mess things up by contacting.
    But even the content of these have changed. I am asking him to chat or e.g..
    Just asking about something he has shown me or thanking him. He didn't reply but I really don't care :)
    I think since my mind is becoming better perhaps I should treat my exterior too.
    Thinking of joining the gym and doing some volunteer work.

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