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ronsgrl524 · Apr 7, 2008, 01:02 PM

I have this question about giving up your rights to a child. My boyfriend has a daughter that is 10 months old he has never seen her and has a hard time trying to see her because of the child's mother, she tells him that she will not let him see her. He pays child support. The question is He wants to know how he can give up his rights and if he would still have to pay support and if he would still be responsible for his arrears? If you can help me so I can let him know what to do it would be very appreciated. We are from Kalamazoo, MI, if you might know someone we could get ahold of around here to do something about this, I am very confused about this but he wants to give up his rights, there is no adoption thing in question, it would be giving the mother all rights and him none.

JudyKayTee · Apr 7, 2008, 01:10 PM

Originally Posted by ronsgrl524

I have this question about giving up your rights to a child. My boyfriend has a daughter that is 10 months old he has never seen her and has a hard time trying to see her because of the childs mother, she tells him that she will not let him see her. He pays child support. The question is He wants to know how he can give up his rights and if he would still have to pay support and if he would still be responsible for his arrears? If you can help me so I can let him know what to do it would be very appreciated. We are from Kalamazoo, MI, if you might know someone we could get ahold of around here to do something about this, I am very confused about this but he wants to give up his rights, there is no adoption thing in question, it would be giving the mother all rights and him none.

In the US you cannot give up your "rights" without someone else being available to adopt the child. I understand right now he doesn't see the child but pays support - however, he seems (from your post) to be in arrears and wants to give up his rights in exchange for not having to pay the arrearages - ?

He cannot give up his rights and stop paying support unless someone else is willing legally to step into his shoes.

If there is already a support order there should be a custody order. He should go back in and file for visitation or joint custody - unless he just wants to walk away from the child. Then he can pay support and not see her.

svatnsdal · Apr 7, 2008, 01:11 PM

I think he needs to think long and hard about this. He helps bring a child into this world, that child has part of him. Giving up on that child could really hurt in the end, that's mainly for lame men to do, men who can't mature. Sorry.
If he gives up his rights, he will never be able to see his daughter again! He will never know where she is, what's she's doing, how she's doing. Then if he changes his mind years down the road, he's screwed! It's not a smart thing to do.
With keeping his rights, the mother of his daughter has no right to refuse him visits. He will have to go to court, but he doesn't need a lawyer. Just walk into a court house and ask about papers regarding visitation rights. Not exactly how it all works, but I do know he can do all this on his own. He will have to pay child support, but nothing compared to what the woman will be paying!
He could file for custody and then he raises his daughter, that's what supermen do.
Just tell him to really think about it. Even if he gives up his rights, his daughter will still be alive, she won't be erased!

svatnsdal · Apr 7, 2008, 01:13 PM

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

In the US you cannot give up your "rights" without someone else being available to adopt the child. I understand right now he doesn't see the child but pays support - however, he seems (from your post) to be in arrears and wants to give up his rights in exchange for not having to pay the arrearages - ?

He cannot give up his rights and stop paying support unless someone else is willing legally to step into his shoes.

If there is already a support order there should be a custody order. He should go back in and file for visitation or joint custody - unless he just wants to walk away from the child. Then he can pay support and not see her.

A man can just sign the papers giving up his legal guardianship. A woman can't do it that easily, but the man can!

JudyKayTee · Apr 7, 2008, 02:11 PM

Originally Posted by svatnsdal

A man can just sign the papers giving up his legal guardianship. A woman can't do it that easily, but the man can!

Could you give me where you found this? You cannot just walk away in the US - not under these circumstances. The father wants to stop paying support and have arrearages erased.

JudyKayTee · Apr 7, 2008, 02:13 PM

[QUOTE=svatnsdal]With keeping his rights, the mother of his daughter has no right to refuse him visits. He will have to go to court, but he doesn't need a lawyer. Just walk into a court house and ask about papers regarding visitation rights. Not exactly how it all works, but I do know he can do all this on his own. He will have to pay child support, but nothing compared to what the woman will be paying!

Once again you lost me here - how is the woman going to pay?

ronsgrl524 · Apr 8, 2008, 02:33 PM

First off he isn't trying to earse his arrear he will pay them if he too I was just asking if there was anything he could do about it.

JudyKayTee · Apr 9, 2008, 05:31 AM

Originally Posted by ronsgrl524

first off he isn't trying to earse his arrear he will pay them if he too I was just asking if there was anything he could do about it.

Okay, sorry, your question was: "The question is He wants to know how he can give up his rights and if he would still have to pay support and if he would still be responsible for his arrears?"

I thought you were asking if he can give up rights, if he did would he have to still pay support and if he did would he have to pay the arrears?

Obviously I'm misreading something - what are you asking about?