Your message clearly shows that even YOU don't have a grasp on what want to do, much less what you need to do.
You need to stop being so "all or nothing" in your thinking. You can "like" guys without making them the center of your universe. You can see a guy without making him into a "boyfriend" and getting your family all up in arms. (BTW, that's their job. You're right... they love you and are worried FOR you, so you have to forgive them and appreciate the effort they're making on your behalf.)
And since there is ANOTHER 20yr old guy on the table now, you need to stop frequenting places that put you ( a 16 yr old ) into the target sights of 20 year olds.
Clubbing, at 16? You feel like a "ho" because you're acting like one. And don't get all defensive and accuse us of calling you a "ho", I'm just responding to YOU. You already know you're acting sleazy, and I detect you want to have a better situation, even in your own mind. OK, then I will talk straight to you and expect you to understand my point.
Listen to your parents, "friendship" with 20yr olds is dangerous (and exciting, I know I know... give me a break!), so you're going to have to put up with all your loved ones and friends properly freaking out FOR your since you're too busy having fun to stop yourself. It's good to have someone doing it, if you won't.
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