[jessica-26]

Hello all first time being on here so here's the question my boyfriend and I have been together for 7yrs we spit up for a bit and he got another girl pg I forgave him and now his son is 4yrs old and I'm totally in love with him we get him on weekends but my boyfriend is not on the birth certificate his son doesn't have his last name either I want his son to have his dads last name but the mom is datin a new guy and so happens the mom and new boyfriend have the same last name she doesn't want to change his last name I thinks its because of the new boyfriend how do we go about changing his last name?

[Sarah48375]

In my opinion, as a single mother, the child should keep the mother's last name. My daughter has her father's last name... different than mine. When ever I take her anywhere, I have to prove she is my daughter. We went on a trip out of the country, and I had to prove she was my daughter and have written permission from her father to leave the country. In school the kids are all confused why my last name is different. I had to go to the school and prove I was her mother. Needless to say, there are a lot of complications that go along with the custodial parent having a different last name than the child. I'm not saying it can't be done, but I don't blame her for being unwilling to change it. Also, my daughter is very confused, and at seven, she has already felt like she wasn't part of the family because she didn't share our name. She wanted to have the same name as her immediate family.

[mariposa11]

The mom obviously didn't plan on meeting MR. RIGHT who just happens to have the same last name she does when she gave this child his surname at birth, so the story that she won't change her son's last name because of her new boyfriend is not even remotely plausible to me. She won't change his surname because it is her surname. Period. And there is nothing you can legally do to force the issue. The child has had this last name for 4 years. It doesn't matter if you and your boyfriend like it or not. If he ever had a chance to fight about it legally, it passed 4 years ago when he didn't object. If your boyfriend wanted his son to carry his name, he should have stuck around in the first place. Your post says this is what YOU want, doesn't even mention how the kid's dad feels. Who cares what you want? You may love this kid, and that's great, but you are not his parent and you never will be. Picking a fight with his mom because of your own opinion won't help you and this child build any sort of healthy relationship either. Best advice, it doesn't concern you, leave it alone.