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jdeleuze · Mar 22, 2008, 10:53 AM

My wife and I were married approximately five and a half years ago. About one month after our marriage in Nevada, she went home to England (she is a British citizen). Approximately four months later, she went to the country of Cyprus and decided to stay there and convince me to move there. I stayed for six months but returned home to the US due to a lack of job opportunities. We remained in contact but discussed legal separation and divorce. I returned to Cyprus once approximately three years ago. I leased a home for us but there was dissension almost immediately. I returned home a month later after exhausting my efforts to reconciliate. It has been three years since I've seen her. I have set up homes for us in California but she refused to return. We've remained in touch all of this time but there is no reconciling this relationship. It is over. What I'd like to know is, are there grounds for abandonment here? Or do I need to file for divorce?

N0help4u · Mar 22, 2008, 11:12 AM

If you ever want to get married again you need a divorce. Ask what she feels about getting a divorce. If she is okay with it then go for it.

JudyKayTee · Mar 22, 2008, 12:06 PM

Originally Posted by jdeleuze

My wife and I were married approximately five and a half years ago. About one month after our marriage in Nevada, she went home to England (she is a British citizen). Approximately four months later, she went to the country of Cyprus and decided to stay there and convince me to move there. I stayed for six months but returned home to the US due to a lack of job opportunities. We remained in contact but discussed legal separation and divorce. I returned to Cyprus once approximately three years ago. I leased a home for us but there was dissension almost immediately. I returned home a month later after exhausting my efforts to reconciliate. It has been three years since I've seen her. I have set up homes for us in California but she refused to return. We've remained in touch all of this time but there is no reconciling this relationship. It is over. What I'd like to know is, are there grounds for abandonment here? Or do I need to file for divorce?

The wording you used is somewhat confusing - I don't know if there are grounds for abandoment and an Attorney may recommend some other, easier grounds.

But you would still need to file for divorce - abandonment would be the grounds.

Do you understand what I mean? Having grounds does not negate the need to file for a divorce.

cdad · Mar 22, 2008, 01:39 PM

If you are in California you do not have to state anything for grounds to base a divorce on. That fact that you desire a divorce is good enough. Now are far as separate property during the marriage that's a different story. If you were acting in good faith and although she didn't reside with you she still has rights to what you have and you have rights to hers So be prepared for a legthy paper trail. If its uncontested ( meaning you both agree on settlement of assets and marital properties ) then it can go quickly. If contested you will have to go through 6 months of separation ( legal ) and a trial for a divorce. Either way get a lawyer and find out how to work this with one party being out of town and a non U.S. citizen.

JudyKayTee · Mar 22, 2008, 02:44 PM

Originally Posted by califdadof3

If you are in California you do not have to state anything for grounds to base a divorce on. That fact that you desire a divorce is good enough. Now are far as seperate property during the marriage thats a different story. If you were acting in good faith and although she didnt reside with you she still has rights to what you have and you have rights to hers So be prepared for a legthy paper trail. If its uncontested ( meaning you both agree on settlement of assets and marital properties ) then it can go quickly. If contested you will have to go through 6 months of seperation ( legal ) and a trial for a divorce. Either way get a lawyer and find out how to work this with one party being out of town and a non U.S. citizen.

Hmm - didn't know that about California. I DO know that one of the grounds used to be insanity because a friend of mine was going to divorce her husband and when she said, "Insanity," and I said, "What?" she said she must have insane to marry him in the first place.

Absolutely a true story.

Here - in NYS - we make up something instead of having grounds that make sense. So in California just having enough of a person is grounds? Hmm -