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21 n 1 · Mar 18, 2008, 02:03 PM

I just told the father of my child that Im 9-10 weeks pregnant... The first thing that came out of his mouth was...." IS IT TOO LATE FOR AN ABORTION?" Im not gettin an abortion. I dont agree with them, never the less I not in good standing to raise a child, but I knw I will do whatever it is that I have to do to take care of me and my child... BUT I AM NOT KILLING MY CHILD PERIOD. So I thought I would save him the hassel and jus have him sign over his rights and jus live my life with my child and to just tell her I had a artifical conception. But I have been finding trouble finding the documents for him to sign. He already has on child and he payin child support for him but he is also in his life. He is a good father to the child he has now, he jus doesnt wont another. And honestly I didnt ever wont a kid either, but Im not considering adoption. I jus wont him to sign over his rights and never see him again.... THERE IS NO FEELING LIKE NO BEING WANTED... MY UNBORN BABY DID NOT CREATE HERSELF... BUT IAM A DRAMA FREE KINDA GIRL AND I JUS WONT US TO GO OUR SEPARATE WAYS. The father and I were really really good friends I considered him... My BEST PHRIEND, but now I feel that he hates me for something we both did.
What Do I Do?:confused: :confused:

COOKIE MONSTER · Mar 18, 2008, 05:25 PM

Jesus you've just told him your pregnant with his child give him abit of time to get his head round it and then see what he's says,its abig shock saying oh by the way I'm pregnant to aman,he will need some time,give him afew weeks to think about everything and then see what he's says,then if he still wants nothing to do with the baby go to your solicitor and get him/her to draw the right papers up for you.but I really think you should give him awhile to think about it before you jump in with aform to give his rights up

REMEMBER your child will find out the truth 1day if you lie,its always the way you lie then get found out nomatter how many years go past and your child will hate you for it,its abig thing you can't just lie

Plus just for e.g. what if your child got sick [i hope she doesnt]but what if she did and you need his bonemarrow or something he could just turn round and say its nothing to do with me I signed myrights away,go away.you have to think about these things

ScottGem · Mar 18, 2008, 05:37 PM

Sorry girl it doesn't work that way. There are hundreds of threads here all on the same issue. If you had read some of them you would have found that out. Relinquishing rights is not taken lightly. Its not a matter of filling out a form. One has to petition a Family Court to terminate rights. And judges to not grant terminations lightly. Generally they are only granted if there is someone waiting to adopt or the father presents a danger to the child. Neither seem to be the case here. So the likelihood of this being granted is slim and none.

I applaud you for your conviction against abortion, But you need toconsider the child. If you aren't prepared to raise a child you need help. You can decide to not file for child support, but if you need to file for public assistance they will want to go after the father for support. One of the reasons a judge won't grant it.

So, if you want to try and go it on your own and not involve the father go ahead, just don't ask him for anything. But forget about himbeing allowed to relinquish his rights.

cdad · Mar 18, 2008, 06:22 PM

Another thing that you need to consider is nothing can really be done until the child / children are born. Until then you and the baby are one. So when the law looks at it from a Family Court Bench they can't even consider matters until birth. Good Luck.

Fr_Chuck · Mar 18, 2008, 06:47 PM

Hello, first you will find there are no such "forms" On the next no on can do anything until the child is born. If you don't put him on the birth certficate, then he has no rights unless he latter files for some rights or visit.

In a few states he may be able to sign over his rights after the child is born, but he will still be liable for child support, and if you or the child is ever on any government assistance, even some of the state health insurance programs for children using state funds, the state holds the right to go after the father for payments.

So you best bet is just to have the child, don't list a father, and hope he never comes back around

stinawords · Mar 18, 2008, 07:19 PM

What I'm about to say means no offence to you it is just something you may want to think about. You have already said you are not in the position to raise a child. He has already expressed his feelings (though they might change). You could also think about adoption. I know this is hard, believe me I know! It is one way to try to help your child as much as possible though because there are tons of stable couples that children but can't have any of their own. If that's not the road you want then you need to wait till the baby is born to do anything with the father.