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lyla24 · Mar 8, 2008, 11:11 PM

My boyfriend has no interest in sex. We've been together about four months, he's always telling me how beautiful I am and how lucky he is to have me, but we've only had sex a handful of times. When I talk to him about it he says he's just been under a lot of stress. We spend every night together and he's very affectionate but it never goes further than kissing and hugging. I don't know what to do I love him so much and he is amazing to me in every other way. This is seriously affecting myself esteem and Im starting to flirt with other men just to get a reaction out of him.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated

dudubrown · Mar 9, 2008, 12:01 AM

You should try not to show him much attention a challenge is always good in a relationship and next time he does want to have sex play hard to get us men like that

hollylovesbrandon · Mar 9, 2008, 11:58 AM

Maybe you shouldn't be spending every night together. Try to spend time with friends and get out of each others hair every now and then.

TKK1028 · Mar 9, 2008, 12:23 PM

Originally Posted by lyla24

My boyfriend has no interest in sex. We've been together about four months, he's always telling me how beautiful I am and how lucky he is to have me, but we've only had sex a handful of times. When I talk to him about it he says he's just been under a lot of stress. We spend every night together and he's very affectionate but it never goes further than kissing and hugging. I don't know what to do I love him so much and he is amazing to me in every other way. This is seriously affecting my self esteem and Im starting to flirt with other men just to get a reaction out of him.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated

Sounds like he's having sex with someone else too. You need to show him that you're better at it than his other partner. Turn the lights down after you've both had a few drinks, do a strip tease for him, and then give him the best BJ he's ever had. Get him up again and then have incredible sex with him. He won't ever go back to the other woman, and he'll want you all the time!

blk_beauty · Mar 9, 2008, 01:34 PM

Actually it could be a number of things, how long have it actually been since you two had sex? If he says he's stressed tell him sex could help him relieve some of that stress. Do you think he's cheating, any signs? The best thing to do is talk to him and tell him how you feel about this situation.Tell him you love him but if you can't get it from him you'll have to go else where! Lol Good Luck!

Rate me please.

Choux · Mar 9, 2008, 07:00 PM

Dating is a time when you get to know a man to see if there is any future with him.

You have only been going with him for 4 months... he seems great to you, but he doesn't want to have sex with you. I recently read an article that women are more and more aggressive sexually and that as high as 25% of young men don't want to have sex!

Why don't you cool it off a bit... maybe you're being too pushy for now?

Alty · Mar 9, 2008, 07:11 PM

He seems to be satisfied with the relationship the way it is. Maybe he's old fashioned and would like to get to know you better before having a heavy sexual relationship, after all, it's only been four months.

If you really care about him and this is really bothering you then you need to talk to him about it and be very clear that you can't handle this.

If you are flirting with other men to make him jealous, then you obviously don't care about him very much and lack in maturity. Maybe that is what's turning him off.

I agree with Choux, cool it off a bit.

Good luck.

lyla24 · Mar 9, 2008, 10:31 PM

Originally Posted by lyla24

My boyfriend has no interest in sex. We've been together about four months, he's always telling me how beautiful I am and how lucky he is to have me, but we've only had sex a handful of times. When I talk to him about it he says he's just been under a lot of stress. We spend every night together and he's very affectionate but it never goes further than kissing and hugging. I don't know what to do I love him so much and he is amazing to me in every other way. This is seriously affecting my self esteem and Im starting to flirt with other men just to get a reaction out of him.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated

Im positive he's not cheating. We've been talking more about the issue, and he says he just doesn't have any sex drive right now. Im worried if we don't have a healthy sex life now, what's it going to be like in the future? Sex is not everything but it is important.
We've had sex once in the last two months. I don't even try to initiate it any more and have completely backed off, but nothing is changing.

ISneezeFunny · Mar 9, 2008, 11:34 PM

There's a handful of possibilities... as he COULD be cheating (but if you're sure... then... fine), he could be under a lot of stress, he may just not be that sexual of a person, he may want to take the relationship a bit slower, etc.

Anything goes. I wouldn't push him so much for the sex, but just spend time with him and get to know him a bit better. If the sex life doesn't get better given within a few weeks, then you may want to reconsider someone who has a similar drive as you... or be prepped to make big sacrifices in the bedroom.